What is the best way to open a woman when you cold approach? Is a simple Hi the best way to go? How do most of you guys start a conversation with a complete stranger on a cold approach? I'm not having any success in even getting them to talk to me.
Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single
She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.
You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.
The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.
Opening basics
- Thread starter Das
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Igetit!
Moderator
Been here three years,and you're asking questions about the basics?
WOW.
Well,like they say-I guess it's better late than never.
You say that you're not having any luck getting women to talk to you with whatever it is you're currently doing. Well, could you give a description of how you try to approach women right now? Maybe we can take a look at your current method to see what the deal is,and why you're having problems.
WOW.
Well,like they say-I guess it's better late than never.
You say that you're not having any luck getting women to talk to you with whatever it is you're currently doing. Well, could you give a description of how you try to approach women right now? Maybe we can take a look at your current method to see what the deal is,and why you're having problems.
BongDuy
Master Don Juan
If you're at a party, class, club, with friends, get next to her and ask " you want a piece of gum?"
Well I joined up, and was going to start asking questions and learning, and I got distracted by life and completly forgot about the site. Then I hit rock bottom, searched the net, found the site again asked a couple of questions, then I had to deal with a mess of professional problems for the last year or so, but they are squared away now so thats where the three years went.
Lets take yesterday for example. My buddy invited me to his company picnic. We meet up with some of his friends from work. I'm not really friends with them, but we all get along pretty well. Anyways theres a girl with them that isn't hooked up with anyone. (I found that part out later) I walked up to her to introduce myself " HI my names George" and I hold out my hand and nothing. No answer or acknowledgement that I even was in front of her. Just left me there hanging. So I'm a little upset and go "okay" and just leave her there. So anyway later to wrap it up Igor, my buddy's friend, and I were talking later and he suggests that I talk to this girl and he points out the same girl that blew me off earlier in the day. And thats how I found out she is single, and according to Igor at least is looking. I just chalked it up to her being a c**t and had fun with the rest of the group we were with.
I've tried other things like complimenting what they were wearing or their hair and stuff but I can never get them to answer me back. Sometimes they smile sometimes the give me an "OMG how dare you talk to me" look, but I can NEVER get them to open up a little bit.
Lets take yesterday for example. My buddy invited me to his company picnic. We meet up with some of his friends from work. I'm not really friends with them, but we all get along pretty well. Anyways theres a girl with them that isn't hooked up with anyone. (I found that part out later) I walked up to her to introduce myself " HI my names George" and I hold out my hand and nothing. No answer or acknowledgement that I even was in front of her. Just left me there hanging. So I'm a little upset and go "okay" and just leave her there. So anyway later to wrap it up Igor, my buddy's friend, and I were talking later and he suggests that I talk to this girl and he points out the same girl that blew me off earlier in the day. And thats how I found out she is single, and according to Igor at least is looking. I just chalked it up to her being a c**t and had fun with the rest of the group we were with.
I've tried other things like complimenting what they were wearing or their hair and stuff but I can never get them to answer me back. Sometimes they smile sometimes the give me an "OMG how dare you talk to me" look, but I can NEVER get them to open up a little bit.
Depends on what kind of "cold approach" you mean. A stranger in the street or at a store in the day time is different to one at a party or picnic, or to one at a club.
I'll give a little advice on cold approaching women you don't know and aren't associated with in any way, and who are just out there minding their own business (like a woman walking on the footpath or at a shop.)
The best way to start a conversation in that situation is with a comment of some kind. For example, if they're at a shop and have a bag full of 20 bananas, make a comment about it, or ask about it. At a shop, if you're looking at a shelf and a cute woman walks past, ask her which sauce would be best with whatever meal. Not only will it start a conversation, you should be able to work out how good of a cook she is
.
If you can't find something to comment on, or if you're walking past her, ask if you can get her opinion on something (works well if you're just walking past each other in the street). It's non-threatening, simple, and does a good job of getting women to stop and talk to you. Make it something sincere. Once you've got their opinion, introduce yourself and go on from there as usual.
I'll give a little advice on cold approaching women you don't know and aren't associated with in any way, and who are just out there minding their own business (like a woman walking on the footpath or at a shop.)
The best way to start a conversation in that situation is with a comment of some kind. For example, if they're at a shop and have a bag full of 20 bananas, make a comment about it, or ask about it. At a shop, if you're looking at a shelf and a cute woman walks past, ask her which sauce would be best with whatever meal. Not only will it start a conversation, you should be able to work out how good of a cook she is
.If you can't find something to comment on, or if you're walking past her, ask if you can get her opinion on something (works well if you're just walking past each other in the street). It's non-threatening, simple, and does a good job of getting women to stop and talk to you. Make it something sincere. Once you've got their opinion, introduce yourself and go on from there as usual.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Poonani Maker
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 29, 2007
- Messages
- 4,392
- Reaction score
- 927
I interact with a multitude of women Everyday. What I say is a simple, and maybe with a handshake, "Hi, how are you??" or "Hello, how's it going?" or "How do you do?" I have standard "Fine" "Pretty good" "The weather's good" "What do you do with all your time?" followups.
i don't know...very strange that i alwys have the "hi" or a nice compliment work. in fact, compliment works great i think. hi also works.
one good opener is "what's the time?" and after getting it, just turn you back like you are going to leave but then suddenly turn around and say "actually that was an excuse to talk with you, i'm suman" (put your name in there)
opening basics:
situationally relevent
not coming on too strong
body language
don't get her sure about whether you want it or not
one good opener is "what's the time?" and after getting it, just turn you back like you are going to leave but then suddenly turn around and say "actually that was an excuse to talk with you, i'm suman" (put your name in there)
opening basics:
situationally relevent
not coming on too strong
body language
don't get her sure about whether you want it or not
Poonani Maker
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 29, 2007
- Messages
- 4,392
- Reaction score
- 927
This is a helpful video, to me, on opening http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_PjTW4d95k