"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Online Personals Without A Pic?
- Thread starter Juan_Man
- Start date
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
Search the forum, there's countless posts about it.
Go on Yahoo personals. There you can remain invisible and have only people you have contacted be able to see your profile.
Match...I'm really starting to hate that service. Virtually no privacy now...you have to be visible to everyone for someone to see your profile, and now you're even able to see who's looked at your profile.
And check this out. My match profile has been hidden for two months, but somehow three people viewed my profile yesterday. Also, a girl in my club saw it is now harassing me about things I wrote in it. I think she's a little spiteful and bitter that I turned her down last fall when I started seeing my ex. Still trying to figure out how to handle this...ignore her, tell her to fvck off, or try to defuse the situation so she doesn't try to embarrass me in front of other people we know.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
What the heck did you write to get he so teed off or did you lead her on?
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
LegalSeduction
Don Juan
would match.com or any company allow you to have an image like that? would they cancel your account or something?
squirrels
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 15, 2003
- Messages
- 6,620
- Reaction score
- 186
- Age
- 47
Dude...would you try to get with a GIRL who didn't provide a pic? You will get zippy chicks without one.
Just take one and upload it. Are you ashamed of your appearance?
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
They won't cancel your subscription, they just wouldn't post something like that.
LegalSeduction
Don Juan
what do you mean? they screen all the pictures before they're uploaded? i thought it was automated
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
The pictures are validated by human intervention. If it were automated, people could post any type of picture imaginable.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
The problem is not, at least according to the guy asking, that he's ashamed of his apperence. The problem is that he feels ashamed of entering the online dating scene. Now, this IS a problem.
I've posted online profiles at different websites getting ZERO responses without pictures(During the first days, or week, when the staff are 'accepting' the picture), and then immidiately having girls writting to me once the picture(s) are there.
This is a fact.
Now, to the most important point. Do not believe that someone will write you and ask for a picture unless your personal profile is outstanding(Even then the odds will be against you).
Why is this? People are lazy!!! Just put yourself in their situation. There are thousands of guys on the dating site, and almost all have pictures. Why in the whole world would this girl take her time to first write you a email, motivate why she wants the picture, wait for hours and even days to recieve the picture -- When she knows that you might - not even - be good-looking?(from her point of view... which is the only one that really matters in this case).
This girl knows that she, instead, could spend this time finding at least 10 other guys which she ALREADY KNOWS are good looking.
Just think about it. This is how I do when browsing communities like myspace or dating sites for good-looking girls.
If I see a girl without a picture(which have been a member for a while) I think;
"Oh, if she doesn't have a picture im sure she's ashamed of herself. NEXT!"
As a matter of fact I don't even read the personal description. The first thing I do is looking at the picture and trying to decide weather I wanna get to know her or not.
Girls work the same way.
You do as you like, but just remember - The odds are clearly against you without a picture. It's up to you.
LegalSeduction
Don Juan
Could you please name some of them? I'd like to sign up with one