"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Online Personals (Merged threads)
- Thread starter Komodo
- Start date
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
miscombobulated2
Don Juan
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- Feb 17, 2003
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I have been utterly unsuccessful in getting even a single reply on all the online dating sites I've tried. Can you guys post some transcripts of what you did to get an answer?
Howie Farkes
Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 19, 2003
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Keep EVERYTHING lighthearted, C&F until... well... always. Don't ever say you're a romantic nice guy who still believes in the long lost art of chivalry. My profile mainly just listed some of the things that I most love doing in life (guy stuff like motorcycling and mountainbiking) - basically give the impression that your life is full and that any girl is gonna have to compete hard for your time. And when I mean your life is full, work and study don't count - everyone has to do these things - it should be stuff you really enjoy and make time for, not excuses to get out of.
What works in the real world works just the same on internet. Along the lines of Pook's Be A Man, Have a life and be genuinely happy. You're just looking for a girl to perhaps supplement your life, you're NOT looking for a girl to BE your life. Desperation in your profile and emails is just as off-putting as in any social situation.
Contrary to popular belief, online chicks are not aliens. They actually are people too. Don't quote me on that though...
Yeah, I didn't get too many replies from my profile, but if you try to find something that relates to you in theirs- they will be likely to respond. Just try and make it clear ASAP that you are not some loser jerkoff...you're busy and you see this as a cool way to meet someone more like yourself.
Howie Farkes
Don Juan
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- Apr 19, 2003
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Again, like the real world, the expectation is that the guy initiates things. I have had only 2 girls ever contact me first, and those were just "kisses" - a service whereby attention wh&*rs can fish for more responses to their profiles.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
One on One
Master Don Juan
Internet dating sucks. I can't believe what just happened. Ok, first of all, I know that talking to girls online for a long time is AFC and should be avoided. I don't need people to tell me that. Anyways, here's the ****ed up story.
Last June, I get this IM from some girl who I guess is really good at flirting online. We talk for about a year and she seems like a really nice girl and my type. She sends me a picture and she is quite attractive. However, it's only a face picture and now I've learned it would be recommended to request at least 150 pictures, a SS card, driver's license, and medical records.
Basically, this girl had been getting on my nerves lately and she didn't want to meet me for some reason. I couldn't figure out why since she was all over me. **** we had phone sex like 4 times (something I totally regret). I made up a new screenname and secretly chatted with her. I just wanted to check some information she had given me. So, we start chatting and I have to go through the basics like where you from, etc. I make up a story that I'm a big dude who played football in HS. She offers to send a picture and I get this picture of this overweight girl with a sorta cute face. I don't find this girl attractive at all, but her previous picture was flattering.
I won't ever admit to her what I now know, but I'm not going to chat with her. It's unbelievable what you can do with 2 seperate pictures...they can be so different. What I've figured out is that she wasn't afraid to send the full body picture to the big football player guy, but she was afraid to send it to me, the tall, slim, athletic guy. I asked her for pics multiple times and she always said she didn't have anymore.
Don't give me any advice, don't tell me how AFC it is to do some of the stuff I did. The internet is still a place you can find girls, but make sure you get lots of pictures and proof. Just a serious warning to all the guys out there not to waste their time.
In fact I cant handle all the women and ussually diss most of them while im bangin thier compettion. I do see a probelm with alot of horny loser women not to mention the fatones.
But I am here to tell you I have met and either been dissed , dissed them, fuc-ked them, or have been fuc-ked.
Who gives a crap how you meet them as long as you are meeting them
My 2 cents--dont knock it till you try it.
Or you can knock it and Ill just have more snizatch for myself, Im getting tired at times though so help a brother out
A1SteakSauce
Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 26, 2003
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- 52
I am still trying to successfully meet someone online. It's kind of become like something I got to do before I die b/c I never thought it would be so hard in the first place.
Anyway, I've had some very short anonymous emails with one girl for the past two weeks. I did not make any profile myself for this dating service (too cheap) but just contacted her directly and it's been short messages of one or two sentences back and forth every couple days. There is no sign of interest except that she keeps replying, at least a half dozen times by now. She also said I seem "mysterious" and when I asked her to imagine what I was like she said "self-confident." I attribute that to the fact that I made value statements rather than ask questions and I didn't play by the rules (no profile).
So that part seems good, but this is taking way too long overall. I know from past experience if you make too strong a move you scare them off. So I want a pic or a phone # but I don't see how I can get this without scaring her away. The last one I asked for a phone # wanted my resume first. I'd like to hear from some guys who've done this successfully how you got the #. Also, keep in mind she is not a party girl type, but more intellectual (based on her profile) which suits me better. One option is maybe just to keep batting the ball back and staying self-confident and mysterious until she gets so bored she asks for my #?
One more relevant fact is I told her to take a personality test and send me the results . . . and she did.
Thanks for any advice. This can't be as hard as I am making it.
A1
Sowatchasayin
Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 3, 2002
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- 58
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In my experience, this has been true in almost every case. If they can't think of something to say online, they'll have little to bring to the party in the flesh. And I can almost guarantee that they'll be equally unimaginative between the sheets.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Starman
Master Don Juan
I think by the 2nd email..you should ask for the number or chat on AIM..other wise the chick thinks you are just looking for a pen pal..
duke007
Master Don Juan
While he and a friend waited at the meeting place, these two dog ugly girls walked past. He then thought "Phew that was lucky". But then they turned around and asked, "Is your name Ben?"
So with crushed spirits the two agreed to continue the date, and found out they had terrible personalities on top of their poor looks.
So here's the funny part, they decided to just break off contact while at the game and pretend they weren't even there!
Then halfway through the game the girls said, "Boys, we're just going to get a drink." Lucky for my friend, they didn't return
descartes
Don Juan
what site have you used on the net and successfully met grls?
i tried adultfriendfinder, but it was a bunch of girls trying to get you to go on their website where you have to pay to see them live on their webcams(they are certainly not looking for a man)
what site has real grls looking for someone?
thanx for any help
Dust 2 Dust
Master Don Juan
I have met five girls online by using AOL instant messenger. I just do a search for girls in my area and it gives you a list of profiles and messenger names.
“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”
Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.
I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.
Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules. Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.
Dee-Zy
Master Don Juan
jlujan
Don Juan
When you guys say you got 5 dates does that mean you where contacted by those 5 women or you had to contact like 10 or 15 women to get those dates??
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.