OK guys I met this girl on facebook last december....she stayed in colorado and I stayed in california..I figured I hit her up because she was cute so f it....anyways we would talk everyday but I had other females so I wasnt really sure about her...main reason I wasnt sure was because she was a good looking female who is 26 and no kids and a decent job so I say damn whats the catch..i was like whatever...so after months of talking and falling in love everything i take trip out to colorado to visit her in august...you know 3 days...everything was wonderful i mean we had sex all day everyday she seem like the love of my life...i met her family and everything...so after I left we decided we should get a place together in colorado...so in october we find a place..so she flys out to cali to meet my family and help me drive back to colorado...so anyways about 6 days into us living together everything ****in changed I mean everything...now guys keep in mind I have no job because I left my job in cali to be with her so now im looking for a job and she just changes on me...before she wanted have a baby with me and get married but now she doesn't want any of that...now were living together broken up and we sometimes have sex..its just crazy how quick she changed on me...what you guys think?...I think I am a idiot for moving out here with her
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Online love...moved to another state to be with a female
- Thread starter brady1124
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Iceberg
Master Don Juan
Well....yeah.brady1124 said:
But everyone makes mistakes. It's not like you have kids with her....you can easily get out of this situation.
If you want to.
And that's a big "if".....because most guys who do what you just did are desperate as hell, and really naive about the concept of love. So I guess I'm saying that it wouldn't surprise me if you convinced yourself that this is a "rough patch" and your true love will overcome these hard times.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Iceberg
Master Don Juan
brady1124 said:
Yep.
Well.....see ya.
You should never move in with a woman you aren't MARRIED to because if something goes wrong you can't distance yourself from her and get space.
1) Did you sign a lease at the new place?
If not then get out of there. You are not legally obligated to anything.
2) Can you get out of your lease if you did sign one?
In a lot of cases you will only lose your deposit and a slight credit downgrade, and it might be worth doing to get away from her.
3) Just cause she gave you sex does not mean you owe her anything, especially moving several states away to live with her.
1) Did you sign a lease at the new place?
If not then get out of there. You are not legally obligated to anything.
2) Can you get out of your lease if you did sign one?
In a lot of cases you will only lose your deposit and a slight credit downgrade, and it might be worth doing to get away from her.
3) Just cause she gave you sex does not mean you owe her anything, especially moving several states away to live with her.
No my name isnt on lease....I figured I shouldnt put it on there and I cant move back to cali till I find a job out here...I need money now but what kills me is she cooks for me and everything..I mean if you dont like me why do stuff like that.
Mantis Toboggan
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 27, 2010
- Messages
- 859
- Reaction score
- 58
Ugh. I can see where this thread is going.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Mantis Toboggan
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 27, 2010
- Messages
- 859
- Reaction score
- 58
brady1124 said:
You're not very bright are ya
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
omkara
Senior Don Juan
You are probably just young and haven't learned the true nature of (most) women yet. I too believed a woman's words once. Basically, she will stay true to you as long as she feels like it. Nowadays women are not held accountable for their actions so they can basically follow their feelings at will, and those feelings change like the wind.
There is no longer any guarantee that a woman will be faithful to you, but you can increase your odds by developing the suite of characteristics that women are attracted to: confidence, social facility, masculinity, having your s*** together, big muscles, guns, trucks etc.
It is shocking at first how a woman can say all these things and then, in extreme cases, act like she never knew you. Ever since I went through a break up 4 years ago I've just been focusing on increasing my own value to women, rather than any one particular woman. And that is what most of the guys in this community are doing one way or another.
There is no longer any guarantee that a woman will be faithful to you, but you can increase your odds by developing the suite of characteristics that women are attracted to: confidence, social facility, masculinity, having your s*** together, big muscles, guns, trucks etc.
It is shocking at first how a woman can say all these things and then, in extreme cases, act like she never knew you. Ever since I went through a break up 4 years ago I've just been focusing on increasing my own value to women, rather than any one particular woman. And that is what most of the guys in this community are doing one way or another.
Desdinova
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2004
- Messages
- 11,681
- Reaction score
- 4,879
You've built up a foundation for your own life (your own place, a job, etc). You decide to replace that foundation for your life with a woman. Now the woman doesn't like you and your foundation is gone.
This is why people should NEVER make a woman more important than the basic necessities. Love can't pay your bills nor put a roof over your head.
This is why people should NEVER make a woman more important than the basic necessities. Love can't pay your bills nor put a roof over your head.
Gray The Prince
Master Don Juan
He could possibly be trolling. However, you would be surprised on how many guys would sell their souls for some poon.JonJaper said:
50/50 chances he's trolling, but his story is possible.
Here's a Zarky tip...
Avoid the following things and you'll be fine:
1) Being convicted of a felony
2) Getting a chick pregnant
3) Getting married before the age of 30
Everything else can be fixed.
Here's a Zarky tip...
Avoid the following things and you'll be fine:
1) Being convicted of a felony
2) Getting a chick pregnant
3) Getting married before the age of 30
Everything else can be fixed.
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.