"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Online dating getting harder, or time to reevaluate myself?

the_stig

the_stig

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 30, 2010
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I need some advice fellas - I've been spinning my tires lately - and might need to reevaluate myself and make some changes.

From 2008-2011 I was killing it on POF. No problems getting second dates and spinning plates, short flings, banging a new girl at minimum once per month while messing around with others on the regular.

Was in a LTR from Aug 2011 to Sept 2013.

I got back on POF from Oct to Dec and was meeting girls left and right. Except this time I garnered very little interest. Slept with two girls, messed around with a few others, but for the number I met, those numbers were very low compared to before.

Now I've been playing around with Tinder. Of the maybe dozen I've met, I haven't had so much as a second date. Basically never hear from them again.

I'm still the same 155 lb physique, same clothing style, non-smoker, runner/cyclist. Only potential problem that comes to mind is that I'm still using photos from 2011-2012 (no 2013 dated photos I really like), but I wouldn't use them if I thought my appearance had changed.

I'm stumped, not sure if I need to take a closer look at myself, or if standards are going up :confused:
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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B

BeDJ

Guest
Online dating requires very little game. If a woman find you pictures attractive you will land a first date with her. That is why women that resort to online dating will never be relationship material. If you want to speak hypergamy, they are the very definition.

Although having said that, not all women do OLD. And not all women who you meet have done OLD. Many members will tell you the generic definition of how women find mates, but I can attest that Not All Women Are Like That. NAWALT.

What you need to realize is that you can and WILL attract a better pool of women offline. I'm fvcking serious. Please believe me. It's all about relationship building instead of swipe right if they are attractive. I rely heavily on my social game, once you develop that, you will be a rockstar. Just focus on your strengths, love people for who they are and you will gather more options than you can friendzone.
 
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