"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Online dating contact question

RickTheToad

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I reached out to this lady last week as we were messaging three or four times and asked if she'd like to get a drink, but she didn't reply. I waited a week and I just shot a messaging saying I just wanted to circle back and see if you'd be up for a drink. She replied back immediately and said Sure! Call me later tonight. I know this is going to sound naive and stupid, but should I call her tonight or wait til tomorrow?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Glassguy

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Call her tonight but keep the convo light and upbeat. No serious talk. Set up the date 5 minutes or so into the call.

Once the call is going well, tell her that you have to run but looking forward to picking the convo back up when you meet for drinks. Always end the call while things are good and the convo is flowing.

Call shouldn't last longer than 15 minutes total.
 

Mazer

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Call her tonight. Ask her out, if she gives you the run around, next her.
If she doesn’t answer the phone, do not contact her again. Let her reach out to you.
 

RickTheToad

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Will do, but she doesn't have my number, I have hers. If she doesn't answer, I will just shoot a quick text and say hey it's Rick, give me a call when you're free.

Also, think I fvcked up another lady who agreed to a drink, but said she was only free Monday or Wednesday; which is fine. I told her on Monday morning I'd reach out, but I a family friend died Monday, and was at the wake, so I didn't reach out until this afternoon. Never heard back. Is this one dead?
 

marmel75

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Circling back can do wonders for you...it worked very well for me aftee giving them a week of dead time.

Do the same thing you did here with her.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Igetit!

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Will do, but she doesn't have my number, I have hers. If she doesn't answer, I will just shoot a quick text and say hey it's Rick, give me a call when you're free.

Also, think I fvcked up another lady who agreed to a drink, but said she was only free Monday or Wednesday; which is fine. I told her on Monday morning I'd reach out, but I a family friend died Monday, and was at the wake, so I didn't reach out until this afternoon. Never heard back. Is this one dead?
Unfortuantely,there's probably a good chance that she won't believe you if you told her that about your family friend.....however,if you suggest an alternate time,she may. But if you have to wait almost another week for the next available day,then yeah.....it probably is dead.

All you can do is try and see what happens.
 

RickTheToad

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I meant to call yesterday, but as soon as I got home I fell asleep in my attire. The whole wake session when on for 12+ hours. Not going to try an offer up an excuse, as that never works. I can reach out next Monday or Tuesday and see if she bites. I wonder why she only has first drinks on Monday and Wednesday. That then has another issue, we'd have to make a drink date for the following Monday or Wednesday. So, if I texted today to set something up for next Monday or Wednesday, what's the big deal? A bit strange.. No?

Perhaps she on a first drink date. LOL.
 

RickTheToad

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She just texted back. LOL. Said she had a bad day at work. Good way to start a text. She did ask how I was doing. sigh.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Mazer

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Usually when a woman opens up with something negative it means she is rejecting you but wants to let you down easily.

bad day= stop contacting me

A woman with interest would have said " I was having a bad day but its gotten better now that you texted me"

I wouldnt even respond. Next!
 

RickTheToad

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Usually when a woman opens up with something negative it means she is rejecting you but wants to let you down easily.

bad day= stop contacting me

A woman with interest would have said " I was having a bad day but its gotten better now that you texted me"

I wouldnt even respond. Next!
Bit negative view of things... No? Only contacted her once. If she didn't want to respond, she wouldn't of.
 

The Diver

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think I fvcked up another lady who agreed to a drink, but said she was only free Monday or Wednesday; which is fine. I told her on Monday morning I'd reach out,
Why you not hitting the iron while it's hot and set up a date on the spot, than and there???. Why waiting till Monday to setup a date for the same day/Monday?
do you think she sitting at home biting her nails waiting for your call? If she is half a decent woman she will have other things running in her life.

Bottom line, waiting to the last minutes to set up a date, is taking the risk there will not be a date.
 

Mazer

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Just going on past experiences my friend. Let us know if you get a date.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

RickTheToad

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I said my day was long and hard, but really good and positive. She's turning around with smiley faces and hamppy emojis.
 

RickTheToad

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Why you not hitting the iron while it's hot and set up a date on the spot, than and there???. Why waiting till Monday to setup a date for the same day/Monday?
do you think she sitting at home biting her nails waiting for your call? If she is half a decent woman she will have other things running in her life.

Bottom line, waiting to the last minutes to set up a date, is taking the risk there will not be a date.
Someone died. Normally I do.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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