Oneitis: an extreme case

[Improving]

hi, lurker for a while, not posted much. 31yo, and a bad case of oneitis. Feedback and support greatly appreciated. I'll keep it short.

May 2010: started dating a girl in the same building as where I work.
August 2010: I expressed doubt about where things were going, as I was maybe not very enthusiastic. After a few days got back.

I had to travel for 2 weeks in June, she left soon after for 4 weeks; halfway those 4 weeks we met up for a weekend. Later in October I had to leave for 6 weeks, and Christmas break again 2 weeks. Lots of travelling first 6 months. After christmas break, she got a dog... I felt a bit excluded, and sleepovers were reduced, as she had to take care of the dog a lot.

May 2011: broke up, as I was under pressure for work, and wasn't in love or anything.
October 2011: tried to get back, had foot in the door, but fvcked it up. She broke it off after 4 weeks.
January 2012: I see her almost daily, and have an extremely bad case of oneitis.

Now, I've done a lot of reading, have some experience with the game and so on. Many girls are not as high-quality as this one. smart, kind, not a single harm. not a single issue with her. The world seems to be ending. Unlikely I'd meet someone as good and high quality as her again. I'm getting obsessed, but can't avoid her completely as she works in same building.

What to do? Anyone else ever had the "she's the one" feeling?
I remember times during Jan-May 2011 that I wanted to get out. Now it's the other way around. I know I'm bargaining, but maybe this is it? Maybe this was my chance?

an AFC (currently).

 

[Improving]

Thanks for you input PPRF.

I did like her, I do like her, she's amazing w.r.t stuff she's done in her life. There is absolutely nothing wrong with her this makes it so difficult to let her go! So, "the best I can get", yes, because I've never met someone who's "better"...

I do sound needy, don't I. I realize that a bit now.

I thought oneitis was being obsessed with someone... thinking a lot about her. Perhaps I don't like her enough. Just seems there's no end to this ****ty feeling.

thanks again.

 

[Improving]

I suppose my eyes were still wandering. It is a common phenomenon that other girls pay more attention to you if you're dating someone. As if they can smell it. It seems to be true. I had all sorts of opportunities, and had a hard time to don't do anything with those.

Another reason was maybe that we never really talked; she's in a different life phase, it seems, having done so much already (only 1 year older) and seemingly ready to settle. I was jealous of her achievements, also wanting to do those things. I've studied and worked all my life, so haven't had the self realization yet, I suppose.

It's very difficult to let go of her as she's still around, so can't ignore her. Everything she does, her laugh, the way she moves, her smell, it all brings back memories. It's amazing how you respond to that.

At this stage, I have no interest in meeting anyone else. There's loads of good looking ones, but none of them seem interesting, even hot ones. I know that life moves on and these are first world problems. Still, it's a bad place to be in, and that no guy should be in. There are a lot of guys talking of girls as if they're bad *****es or something, but there's nice and sincere ones too. It's hard to say goodbye to them. Sounds AFC huh?