You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Cool thread.What do you think you may regret not doing more of when you're lying there...?
Hint: it won't be wishing you had spent more time at the office nor will it be fretting over some dumb bytch....
Don't get me wrong: I say a lot of things about not been attached to ****e etc but I very much live in the real world. Money is fvcking essential. Only a fool would completely dismiss money. But of course, we are back to the old question: are you working for money or is money working for you. I'v tried not to get too attached to money, while still trying to make it work for me......but I'll be honest and say perhaps I haven't totally arrived at that place yet (being unattached ). I still listen to about 3 financial podcasts weekly. I still believe that only a fool doesn't bother to educated himself enough (financially speaking)Cool thread.
Nothing wrong with chasing money, but you hear so often of men who regret spending too much time at the office. A lot of people wish they could have traveled more, and I have blessed enough to have the opportunity to get to 20 US states and about 15 countries by age 27. But I would like the see about half the globe before I die. I have also found I have spent a lot of my most valuable years (my 20s) wasting time on the internet when I should have defined a goal in my head, working towards it every day, toward a final product to leave behind in this world - be it my ideas (writing an actual paperback book that can remain on library shelves, not an ebook that will be compromised when someone eventually owns the internet), an invention, or a company I created.
For me, travel is a great hobby that I want to do a lot of, but wandering aimlessly is not good enough. I need to be offering something to the people of this world as I go to their countries, because very few obituaries strike a nerve when they read "Bob was a loyal employee of Big Sausage Factory for 32 years, and he enjoyed gardening in his spare time." You might respect Bob, but do you think he was happy with that on his deathbed?
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Even though I feel as though I would have accomplished pretty much (or at least most) of what I set out to do.....I believe I would always feel as though I didn't do enough.What do you think you may regret not doing more of when you're lying there...?
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
One reason for acquiring material and financial wealth is it can be passed on to offspring and family. You don't have to spend it all while you are here.i have this conversation with family / friends on almost a weekly basis
i am getting to an age where people are telling me i need to take more responsibility on in life .....buy a house , get a stable relationship , have children , save loads of money blah blah blah
my answer is always the same "why the fvck would i want to do that" i have a job , i pay my rent , car insurance , phone bill and gym membership
to be perfectly honest that's more than enough "responsibility" for me , responsibility is a grown up word for boring
designed by society to keep you in line , to keep you in the format
people seem to think they will live forever ,problem is what use are all those "rules" you've spent your entire life obeying all that money you've saved and all that property you've bought what use is it all when you are dead ......
no thanks
yes but not everyone has offspring or a family they would want to leave anything tooOne reason for acquiring material and financial wealth is it can be passed on to offspring and family. You don't have to spend it all while you are here.
Maybe a special friend became family or someone you wanted to bless.yes but not everyone has offspring or a family they would want to leave anything too
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Good luck, man. Totally agree, by the way.Agree with most on travel here. Hopefully, by the time I reach my death bed, I will not have any regrets or things I wish I had done more.
I am beginning to believe more and more that the marriage, kids, buy a house is some veil brought over all of our eyes by the machine we call democracy. By following this formula, we basically hamstring ourselves into a world of monotony. I can't tell you how many people I have encountered that give the same tired response... "I want to do this, but..." then list of reasons of money, kids, etc. Imagine if more people in society actually pursued their dreams to help advance us as a species? Imagine where we would be as a civilization?
Instead, the masses follow "the formula" while a small group of people actually pursue their dreams and realize their success. The formula is the ultimate control mechanism driven by the fear of failure. It is the exact same thing that landed most of us on this website. The fear of losing our girl, thereby losing her in the process.
Do I practice what I preach? Well, I walked away from a good marriage with a wife that would give me the world. We own a house in Silicon Valley (not an easy feat) and were very comfortable. I have begun my journey and my biggest regret will be if I do not complete it...
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.