on the brink of snapping.. so down..

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i have been lurking around for a while, and i finally registered to post something to get it off my chest.

i never really had problems iwth women but i just got dumped. it was a 3 year relatinoship and few days after that she was going out with this guy and i had to see them everyday cos they lived near and always hungout in the places i do. it hurt so bad.. seeing whatever we used to do with another guy.

life has been tough lately, with studies being more and more stressful each day. finals are aroudn teh corner. i don't have much money, and i can't get normal shift jobs they clash with my classtimes. that means i don't hve the luxury of hanging out enough to keep my mind off htings. i'm 21 and i'm struggling with my life. pathetic. my parents don't care about me, but fortunately they provide me shelter. this doesn't feel like a home anymore, it feels like a hotel.

i can't open up to anyone.. which explains why i'm typing here. my friends don't listen sincerely too.. and no one actually bothers. i guess its normal. people don't really care bout anything else other than themselevs. right at this moment i'm hurting so bad.. because seeing an ex you just broke up with of 3 years being so loving with someone else really makes u wanna explode. it really burnt.. and she didn't even care.

i don't know what to feel. i don't know who to talk to. i don't know what to do. i tried new hobbies, but the hurt overcomes them. i can't get my mind off it even when i'm talkign to other girls cos the unbearable pain overcomes every single thing that i'm tring to do to move on.

it really hurts so bad. maybe thats part of life and you guys are gonna ask me to let time heal it. i will. i just needed to let this out. this is the first time i'm ever really letting my pain and feelings out to other 'people'. it really sucks when you got no oen in real life to talk to.. someone that really cares and wants to listen. no.. all my friends ever care about are their cars (i don't have one), and their life. they listen for 10 secs and go 'oh' and go on with their conversation.

i know it really sounds pathetic and some of you probably hate whiners and all that.. i'm sorry i just needed to let things out. still feel ****ty even after typing this much. i'm really lost now. i never knew things could hurt this bad. obviously not comparable to physical pain.. because they're two totally different things.. but this is really torturing. it must take a real great person to endure all this.. because i certainly can't anymore. i respect those who did..
 

CLOONEY

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dude thats REALLY REALLY harsh!! I cant beleive she doesnt even care. what is she seriously.......obviously NOT worth it! You are still young and have plenty of time, but sometimes when you are hurting this bad you need to FEEL the pain, u cant just push it away, feel it, it will slowly die down, then u can move on, just dont get STUCK in a rut, after a few weeks maybe even a couple of months u should be out doing your own things again. DONT HANG OUT AT THE PLACES YOU USED TO. The more you see her the more it will fukc with your head!! U need to just soak this up as a learning curve in your life, and find a more respectful girl, and THEY ARE OUT THERE! Good luck mate. I feel your pain, I truly do!!
 
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I'm feeling the pain, don't worry. I just feel so so so ****ed up beyond recognition now. i don't mean to whine, seriously.. it just emotionally hit me like BAM. still trying to cope.. just came back from a drink with my friends. still feel the same though.
 

b's nuts

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I feel ya, and this is one of those times when you must stay strong. My first suggestion, if you aren't already, is to get into the gym, and push yourself, it will help you clear some of this aggression. Keep your head up.
 

G_S

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Have you tried saying "serenity now"?
 

chlywly

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We love you man :) Keep on trucking things will clear up, promise ;)
 
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i decided on trying to be famous. maybe because of the pain.. i decided to try to get things off my mind and at least reach one of my many goals. at least this goal is free and reachable atm, unlike material ones like cars. how do i be the guy thats able to walk around college and be greeted by most of the people that he sees?
 
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also, thanks for the comforting words.. because i'd never get anything remotely close to these due to my emotionless friends.
 

Julian

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Man i feel you. Sometimes you just gotta post about all your problems.

Wait till tomorrow, you will feel 10x better already. I guarantee it.
 

Zephyrus

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You sound almost suicidal....

Man that's horrible, you sound soo down. We all feel for ya... lots of us have gone through the exact same thing. (Believe it or not) And it totally sucks!

It probably seems like your the only one who's ever felt this way, but your not... I've been through it. I've had my heart stomped by stiletto heels, after a few years of seeing this girl.

It's a long hard road out of hell"... a wise man once stated, I think it was Marilyn Manson, anyway... it does take time, unfortunately, you may want to avoid those special places the two of you used to visit, avoidance isn't bad, it's even recommended. You could always talk to one of your girlfriends about it, they love that shyt!

Finding and going on other dates will make it easier for sure... I know as soon as this other chic was interested in me, it made it alot smoother.... especially since the new girl had an awsome body which the first girl didn't, but wanted one.

Best of luck during your battle

I hope this Helps.
Zephyrus
 

Jet Jockey

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I know the feeling all too well. It will pass..but it takes time, there is no quick fix.

Best advice I can offer you is to stay away from places she hangs out. Just seeing her with this guy is torture right? Why torture yourself?

Here is your new goal: You need to flirt with at LEAST 4 new woman each day. I mean with good effort. Be all you can be.

Don't let your case of oneitis control your life. If you play your cards right, you won't be alone for long will ya?

I know what hurts. Its the abrupt stopping of all the good things. The intimate times with her, the laughter, the hanging out, the sex.

Well, she is denying you those things now. She is giving them to someone else and that hurts. You my friend, are no better if you don't get up off your azz, and do something about it! Don't deny or deprive yourself of those things! There is another woman..she doesn't know it but she is waiting for you to make your move. She is going to give you all those things!

Hone your skills. Take your mind off your misery long enough to pursue a few other women. You'll get a few "no's" no big deal! You are gonna get some "Yes's" too! If nothing else the law of averages will see to that.

The sooner you get started the sooner, things will get better. Good luck!!
 

Krassus

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"That which doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger"

Everyone here has been through this. EVERYONE. Some even had it worse. But all of them made it out alive, and are now stronger than they were before - and you will too! The pain will fade, and a 6 months from this day you'll be wondering what you were upset about in the first place. In fact, you'll probably wish this happened sooner so that you could go on to meet better women (the kind you'll be meeting then).
 
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Been there myself. You need to start getting laid by other women. You need to start taking these other women to the places where "she" is to let her know that your doing just fine.

This hearless ho needs to be taught a lesson. And the best revenge is doing well.

I hate to speak about a negative with a negative...but some people need to learn a lesson.

Read the f*ucking bible...**** now I am feelin ya pain and anger.

Do a boot camp...start collecting numbers.

here are a few tips from another posts:

Action Plan:

If you set a ship at sail on the ocean with no destination in mind, do you think you will ever get anywhere? What I’m saying is that you must have a plan of action for getting women in your life.

1. First of all decide what type of women do you want:
Intelligent, tall, short, slim, thick, education level, funny, serious, does she work out ect.ect.

2. When you’ve made this list, then break it into 2 separate categories. List A are your must haves. This is the stuff that the women must bring to the table before you will even consider kicking it with her.

3. List B is your criteria of “it would be nice” stuff that she might possess. For example DD breast would be nice but not a major must have.

4. Now you must Stalk your prey. Where does this person hang out at. List at least 5 new places where you would find the type of person that your looking for.

For example. I look for women who are over 30 years of age, intelligent, with good jobs, fun, easy going, low maintenance, integrity, honesty, ect ect… I find them at clubs that cater to older crowds. These clubs will almost always have a band playing, since older people prefer bands over DJ music. I will also find them at local health clubs during x hours…ect ect.

5. Now decide what your willing to do to meet your targets. How far are you willing to go. Are you willing to Ask 3 girls a day for their email or phone numbers? Are you willing to clean up your dress, car and crib, are you willing to go back to school and get an education so that you can attract more intelligent people in your life and get a better job? Unfortunately your playing a numbers game here. You must increase the numbers in the formula in order to come out on top at the end of the equation. That means making contact with as many potentials as possible.

You will go through a process that was described in the e-book “the dating black book”, but I have changed the wording to the 3 F’s:

1. Find em. This is where you go out and introduce yourself to them.
2. F*uck em. Ok now you’ve met em…you then bed em.
3. Forget em. Now you walk away if you decide they don’t quite meet up to your standards. Never be afraid to walk away. Once you get into the swing of it you will realize that you can always meet someone new.

“When you date only a few women you will fall prey to misconceptions and bitter downward spirals of attitudes which will block your ability to meet other women. When you date a lot of women you have the ability to learn more about what does and doesn’t work for you. You have the option of finding those traits that you desire vs those that don’t work for you. Thereby you learn to take control of your whole dating life.”

The hungry never get fed, yet those who do not want always have plenty. When you start obsessing on it you can’t get a date…this is why I have women crawling out my ass. I think in the bible it says something like: he who has shall be given more and he who has little even that shall be taken from him.

Ever notice when you got women, it’s easy to get more women? But like a buddy of mine who doesn’t have one right now, it’s hard to get back into the flow.

Everyone here is self made. We create the conditions of our own life. If you don’t have a woman it’s by your own creation. You need to stop standing in your own way with that weak crap like “I’m too shy” or “ What if I get shot down” My answer to the latter is “SO”. So what you get shot down.

“It’s better to regret the things you did than the things you didn’t do”

and remember life is not shaped by circumstances, it's shaped by action.
 
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Oh thank you for reminding me that we are all human. I had gotten pretty bitter over the last few weeks. And your post touched a spark deep inside...


Now it's time for you to get mad and let your anger channel and fuel you into making some changes in your life. Develop a plan and carry it out.

By this time next month you should have had a few dates...and if money is a problem then solve it. Even if it means having a girl come over to your parents hotelhouse to watch movies with you while they are away one day.

Even if you gotta work partime in the middle of the night....your problems are only obsticales to be overcame. Use your creative imagination and develop a plan of attack.

peace
 
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kid here is another nugget for you to much on. I'm sure the bible has alot of info on approaches to try also.

Approaching made easy or not.

Sometime ago I said you gotta approach dames from a side angle. This is still I feel the best way. Women get guys hitting on them all day long so they got this shield of protection up against any symp who tries to step up to them.

When you walk up and act like you want their number your asking to get shot down. What I like to do is come in from the side. I do this by acting just the opposite of what she expects. I act like I’m not interested in picking her up. If she’s a dime I will not say something corny like “ I think your very beautiful” She has probably heard that all her life.

My favorite thing to do is start with making fun of her in some way. You’ve probably read one of my earlier posts where I did one of my zenmack specials of flipping a girls lips when I get them to look down at some imaginary thing on their shirts. But I almost always did that after I started convo’s with them and cracking jokes.

If you remember my email seduction thread I came in from the side by talking about how that woman’s dance made me feel. Now she is my bottom girl. I moved the accountant to a lower position.

Most of my successful approaches came when I was able to come up with some kind of funny wise assed remark directed at the babe. This showed that I was different from all the other fella’s who put her on a pedistal and bowed down to her eternal beauty.

When you act like your not concerned with her or her looks it will make her try harder to win your attention over. Remember this. This is very important “ho” knowledge.

Combine this with coming in teasing her ass and you will amp up her interest level in you. To do this you must train your brain to think of something slightly funny about every one of your targets.

For the next week pick one girl that you see, every day and go up to her and bust on her butt. Then report back in the entire situation and what happened.
 
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wow thanks for the tremendous support. i bet its because you guys went through it before, thats why you're taking the time to reply. i'd do the same down the road if someone tells me about something like this, cos without anyone to really listen and understand, its hell.

i feel better today, although the image of them having sex does intrude my mind once in a while. hurts like hell when it does. will try to replace those thoughts with better ones like my freedom.

yeah i agree without girls its real hard to get em. now i'm trying to jumpstart my life again. its really hard..

hope i pull through. still burns to the max. argh what a feeling.
 

Legend

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Heartless byitch

Hey man,

I am not going to say oh things will get better dont worry. Who am i to tell you such a thing. Things dont always get better man, things in life do suck, life is a cruel and unforgiving thing.

I feel your pain because i have been there and just got dumped last night. This girl is ignoring me after she sees some other guy that was home for the past four days. Sure i could probably get her back but why? She is a tramp and will do me no good. I want to make my life easier not harder.

Just think of it this way...that girl did you a favor by breaking up with you and moving on. You should do the same, if you cant right now you will be able to in a couple of weeks. Right now i am working on two other chicks from school eventhough i am still hurting from my oneitis.

Since this i am going to focus on myself, i am going to do the things i want to do. I am going to start lifting more at my gym, i am going to try and get my grades up, i am going to try and be the better person and I am going to try and save a lot of cash.

Its so hard to stay happy when you are around such bast*rd people.

Also.....a mistake i have done in the past

Once she ends things ....its over. This same ***** has broken up with me and kicked me so many times. I always have taken her back and tried to fix or repair what went wrong between us. Not anymore, this is the last draw, once i am over her i will never take her back and i will only laugh in her face.

So....she am be back after she gets tried of her new bf, do yourself a favor and not take this heartless stone b*tch back. I wish i had this advice the first time she broke things off.

Hopefully things will get better for all of us....but things seem to be bad for to long now.

good luck man

-John
 

DJ_Dork

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yo dude, work out... jog .. relieve the stress you are feeling. I feel for you and hope you will get over it. You learned a valuable life lesson and nothing is loss.. ALRIGHT.
 

NewMike

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Yeah, i can't stress the Gym enough. It will help you get out extra aggression, make u look better, and build your self confidence.

Better days are just around the corner. :D

Trust me on that
 
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today, she came over to collect her stuff. i was hungry so she said she'd take me out for lunch and she did. she wanted to shop for clothes, and i saw a visor i liked so she bought one for me. she was still holding my hands and hugging me. i feel like a boytoy but deep inside i just want things to work out. she isn't going for the guy anymore, yet tomorrow is the day where i have to see her clubbing with another group of guys and she's probably going to stay over at one of their houses, she doesn't even know them well.

not only do i still feel burnt, i kinda fear for her safety.. but she doesn't want to have anything to do with me other than just being friends. if anything bad were to happen to her, i don't know what to feel.

i'm trying so hard to move on.. and its hard to accept the fact that its really over. i've been exercising and socialising lately but the thought of the things she does just INVADES my mind without me giving it permission to. at 5:50am here, i can't even sleep. this is so pathetic.

i don't know why i'm not man enough to let go.. i don't know how to control my feelings. if i knew how.. i'd make sure i have NO feelings for her at all whatsoever.. but its so tough. its easy for me to break anytime now.. i was once the dominating one in the relationship.. now that its over see whose the whipped one.

aaaahhhhh it sucks and i can literally feel my heart break so many times.
 
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