Rainman4707
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Dec 30, 2012
- Messages
- 1,588
- Reaction score
- 518
Was seeing a girl when i was 14/15. In a LTR with her for 9 months. Kissed another girl behind her back once. Near the end lost interest in her & started trying to see other girls. Then i ended things with her. That was 19 years ago. She could be one of two girls that i have ever loved.
I have checked her face book a few times over the years, but decided not to pursue anything with her.
Last weekend i decided i would meet up with her to see what she was like now. She accepted my invite. We had a catchup. Before she left we had a kiss & a cuddle.
I contacted her next day to arrange another meet... this is the convo :-
Me :-
I'm on an easy job tomorrow night..have the place to myself...so you could call over for a cup of tea. Am not trying for sex, just a chat, like last night
Her :- Hey, thanks for reassuring me, you're as nice as I remember you being. I'm thinking we seem to be on different pages with what we're looking for, so it might be kinder to us both not to keep meeting? I'm pleased you asked me though, it was lovely catching up, I enjoyed seeing you again xx
Me:- What you looking for? x
Her : Looking for something that might have a future, much like your ex, from what you said. x
(the night before , when we met, she asked about my previous relationship. I told it did'nt work out. My ex was wanting more commitment & i was'nt ready.)
Me- I was ****ing stupid letting you go. Biggest mistake of my life. I was young & daft.
I will try my best to give you everything you desire, if you can find it in your heart to give me one last chance.
Her :- Fifteen year old me would've given anything to have heard that from you, you know. I got over that heartache a very long time ago though, there's honestly no hard feelings now.
In the last 10 years I've learnt people don't change for others, only when they're ready for it for themselves. I've been flattered and hooked with promises of trying to change for me before. I want to believe it was meant genuinely, but in the end I'm always the one left hurt and disappointed, told I'm expecting too much.
I think people are happiest when they move at their own pace and find someone who fits in well with that pace, naturally.
Im thinking she is'nt interested. Shes met me & decided..i'm not for her. She is an accountant & im a security guard. I think this could be her way of letting me down gently.
I do want a family & kids, if i meet the right girl. God, feel like she is taking it a bit overboard - just because i wont commit to one girl dose'nt mean i wont commit to another. Like i mentioned earlier though. This could just be a cover, for her lack of interest.
I'm aware i'm being soppy with her, but i feel like i fu*ked things up with her when i was younger & would do anything for another chance. I'm aware this soppy mentality could result in her thinking im a wuss, but dont want to leave things without telling her how gutted i feel about what i did. Maybe she has forgiven me, after all..she met up with me & kissed me. Would she do that if she was still pis*ed with me. Maybe she is ok with me because it has been 19 years since we broke up. I'm just writing my thoughts...as could do with someone elses input, as i have just been thinking about all this myself for the last week.
She told me on our meetup that her ex wouldnt commit to her, he was'nt ready to have kids & marriage with her.
I was so loyal & trustworthy with my last GF. I believe i am so loyal & trustworthy now. Don't believe in cheating whilst in LTR. I would give my own life for a girl that i am with.
I have checked her face book a few times over the years, but decided not to pursue anything with her.
Last weekend i decided i would meet up with her to see what she was like now. She accepted my invite. We had a catchup. Before she left we had a kiss & a cuddle.
I contacted her next day to arrange another meet... this is the convo :-
Me :-
I'm on an easy job tomorrow night..have the place to myself...so you could call over for a cup of tea. Am not trying for sex, just a chat, like last night
Her :- Hey, thanks for reassuring me, you're as nice as I remember you being. I'm thinking we seem to be on different pages with what we're looking for, so it might be kinder to us both not to keep meeting? I'm pleased you asked me though, it was lovely catching up, I enjoyed seeing you again xx
Me:- What you looking for? x
Her : Looking for something that might have a future, much like your ex, from what you said. x
(the night before , when we met, she asked about my previous relationship. I told it did'nt work out. My ex was wanting more commitment & i was'nt ready.)
Me- I was ****ing stupid letting you go. Biggest mistake of my life. I was young & daft.
I will try my best to give you everything you desire, if you can find it in your heart to give me one last chance.
Her :- Fifteen year old me would've given anything to have heard that from you, you know. I got over that heartache a very long time ago though, there's honestly no hard feelings now.
In the last 10 years I've learnt people don't change for others, only when they're ready for it for themselves. I've been flattered and hooked with promises of trying to change for me before. I want to believe it was meant genuinely, but in the end I'm always the one left hurt and disappointed, told I'm expecting too much.
I think people are happiest when they move at their own pace and find someone who fits in well with that pace, naturally.
Im thinking she is'nt interested. Shes met me & decided..i'm not for her. She is an accountant & im a security guard. I think this could be her way of letting me down gently.
I do want a family & kids, if i meet the right girl. God, feel like she is taking it a bit overboard - just because i wont commit to one girl dose'nt mean i wont commit to another. Like i mentioned earlier though. This could just be a cover, for her lack of interest.
I'm aware i'm being soppy with her, but i feel like i fu*ked things up with her when i was younger & would do anything for another chance. I'm aware this soppy mentality could result in her thinking im a wuss, but dont want to leave things without telling her how gutted i feel about what i did. Maybe she has forgiven me, after all..she met up with me & kissed me. Would she do that if she was still pis*ed with me. Maybe she is ok with me because it has been 19 years since we broke up. I'm just writing my thoughts...as could do with someone elses input, as i have just been thinking about all this myself for the last week.
She told me on our meetup that her ex wouldnt commit to her, he was'nt ready to have kids & marriage with her.
I was so loyal & trustworthy with my last GF. I believe i am so loyal & trustworthy now. Don't believe in cheating whilst in LTR. I would give my own life for a girl that i am with.