Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Old Caulk: Caulk Over It, Or Remove It?

Down Low

Master Don Juan
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BOB: Hi I'm Bob Vila. Welcome to another edition of This Old House. In this show, we'll be talking about ways you can protect your home. So stick around.

ANNOUNCER: This Old House is brought to you by a grant from the Natural Endowment for the Humanities.

BOB: The subject of this week's show is old caulk. That can be a lot of trouble. With us is master carpenter Norm Abram.

NORM: Hi Bob.

BOB: Norm, how much of a problem is old caulk?

NORM: It's a big problem, Bob. You don't want to ignore it. If you leave old caulk in the home, she's wide open to all kinds of intrusion. Old caulk is going to pull away from her sides. You can see how the relationship between old caulk and the drywall spoils. It just crumbles away.

BOB: Yeah, that's pretty ugly.

NORM: When old caulk peels away, it leaves her vulnerable to penetration from moisture, microbes, foreign objects, and pests. The home will just rot away.

BOB: So can we just caulk over the old caulk?

NORM: I wouldn't do it. If you ignore the old caulk, and try to apply your goo around it, the old caulk is going to always be there causing problems. Nobody wants that.

BOB: No, I sure don't. What else could go wrong?

NORM: Well, as soon as you start caulking, while the old caulk is still there, you've sealed it in. The old caulk no longer serves any purpose, but it's comfortable lying around. If you did that, it would be practically impossible to remove old caulk without removing the new caulk at the same time.

BOB: That would be counterproductive.

NORM: I'll say. What's needed is to pull the old caulk out and clean up the house. Get the old caulk out before you start your new caulking job.

BOB: Sure. I like to use my handy scraper to just dig in and get that old rotten stuff out.

NORM: The right tool for the job, Bob.

BOB: Right. Give him a good tooling and get him out. Clean up your surfaces. Never rush though it. Good preparation gets you ready to do a good job. Then lay in a fresh bead of high quality, new caulk.

NORM: That's how I do it.

BOB: Thanks Norm. And thank you for joining us . . . on This Old House.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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