Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

OLD - Agreed Upon Meetup, After Some Drag Time

SH03C

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No. Do not ignore. The text is direct and somewhat gracious. Nothing more is needed. Get out of the habit of telling women after a date how good of a time you had. You are killing the mystery.
Yeah do agree. FWIW - I was at a bar post date and talked with a fairly attractive female who said it was imperative that I send a post date text since I was the one that initiated it. Probably not the best resource, in hindsight.
 

EyeBRollin

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Yeah do agree. FWIW - I was at a bar post date and talked with a fairly attractive female who said it was imperative that I send a post date text since I was the one that initiated it. Probably not the best resource, in hindsight.
Oh yeah, terrible advice. Never take dating advice from women.
 

SH03C

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Also @SH03C , read this long time ago , and is a really good starting point about dealing with women early in the seduction

the summary , just like the title is , is that women have different rules depending on how attractive you are as a guy . And being attractive is way more than looks

Great content. Thanks for sharing.
 

SH03C

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Final update:

So it seems I was able to pull her back into frame (See Image). From here I will be touch and go approach this week and attempt to arrange a 2nd date. I may possibly ask her to go salsa dancing Saturday or potentially a concert. Given there was little kino on the meetup I’m looking to escalate and think those options are most suitable.

Always interested in gathering additional insight, so feel free to provide some ideas or words of caution.

Have a great Monday guys!
 

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EyeBRollin

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Final update:

So it seems I was able to pull her back into frame (See Image). From here I will be touch and go approach this week and attempt to arrange a 2nd date. I may possibly ask her to go salsa dancing Saturday or potentially a concert. Given there was little kino on the meetup I’m looking to escalate and think those options are most suitable.

Always interested in gathering additional insight, so feel free to provide some ideas or words of caution.

Have a great Monday guys!
Too much texting my guy. The phone is for setting up the next date. Stop asking her irrelevant questions. She has to wonder about you. Any time you break that silence you are ruining it. The only time you should be texting her is if it is related to setting up the next date.
 

SH03C

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Too much texting my guy. The phone is for setting up the next date. Stop asking her irrelevant questions. She has to wonder about you. Any time you break that silence you are ruining it. The only time you should be texting her is if it is related to setting up the next date.
Do agree. My plan this week will be to lay low. Potentially reach out on Wednesday or Thursday to ask for a weekend meetup. Would this make sense to do?
 

RobbyDog

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Do agree. My plan this week will be to lay low. Potentially reach out on Wednesday or Thursday to ask for a weekend meetup. Would this make sense to do?
Yes it would make sense. You need to read 3% man…it’s free to read online, and covers many of your questions. The book isn’t the be all and end all, but is a good starting point.

I’ll second what was said above: A woman’s attraction to you is built when you two aren’t communicating and she is wondering about you. With a few exceptions, the phone is only for setting up the next date. Many women will complain that they never hear from you—this is a GOOD thing, bc it means she’s wondering about and missing you. Just don’t be aloof to the point of coldness.
 

SH03C

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Yes it would make sense. You need to read 3% man…it’s free to read online, and covers many of your questions. The book isn’t the be all and end all, but is a good starting point.

I’ll second what was said above: A woman’s attraction to you is built when you two aren’t communicating and she is wondering about you. With a few exceptions, the phone is only for setting up the next date.
Appreciate your perspective. I’ve been reading through a lot of content and will make it around to 3% man later today/tomorrow.

Recently @Bigpapa put me on girlschase.com, which has helped me learn a great deal about escalation and banter. All good stuff and willing to devote the time to refine my rusted out game.
 

SH03C

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Yes it would make sense. You need to read 3% man…it’s free to read online, and covers many of your questions. The book isn’t the be all and end all, but is a good starting point.

I’ll second what was said above: A woman’s attraction to you is built when you two aren’t communicating and she is wondering about you. With a few exceptions, the phone is only for setting up the next date. Many women will complain that they never hear from you—this is a GOOD thing, bc it means she’s wondering about and missing you. Just don’t be aloof to the point of coldness.
Wasn’t able to find a free version of 3% man online. Do you have any links? Thanks.
 

Ladykiler

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Also @SH03C , read this long time ago , and is a really good starting point about dealing with women early in the seduction

the summary , just like the title is , is that women have different rules depending on how attractive you are as a guy . And being attractive is way more than looks

Jesus that guy still makes content

wow
 

Ladykiler

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Thanks, will take a look.

Curious to know your method for arranging a second date. Care to share?
do something fun and exciting

i get it you’re a older gentlemen

whaterver hobby you have do that

i personally like basketball

so i put numbers on women heads from time to time

i like athletes you may like dancers or something

I personally think physically active women are sexy
 

SH03C

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@Modern Man Advice

Gotta say, I’ve seen a good deal of legitimate advice of yours, which has been wanting to know how you approach arranging a 2nd date.

How many days after the first do you line up a 2nd? Whats your preferred date, do you approach it differently with a LTR prospect?

Would be greatly appreciated
 

Modern Man Advice

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@Modern Man Advice

Gotta say, I’ve seen a good deal of legitimate advice of yours, which has been wanting to know how you approach arranging a 2nd date.

How many days after the first do you line up a 2nd? Whats your preferred date, do you approach it differently with a LTR prospect?

Would be greatly appreciated
Thanks, brother. I appreciate it.

There is no straight answer to this. The biggest thing is to allow the girl to also make an investment in you. If I planned the first date, it is usually me allowing that girl into my world. Meaning I am giving her a peek of my world. I would then allow her to give me a peek into her world and allow her to plan something.

Now, this can go two ways depending on her interest level in you. If she has a high interest she will make the effort, and there is something powerful about having a girl invest in you. However, if her interest level is low and she has 10 different guys hitting her up, chances are she will fade away. In that case, I let her slip, I don't invest time/energy/resources in girls that are not fully interested and invested. Too old to convince people to be in my life.

Having said that, this doesn't mean you can't suggest a second date. In fact, you should bring it up towards the end of the date (depending on how well you can read her interest level). Perhaps casually while talking about one of her hobbies/interests. Let her know you would like to hang out again, be clear if that is what you want.

And yes, if it's a girl I am not fully interested in and just casually dating her then I simply approach it less intentionally. Meaning, I care less if I see her again or not, don't suggest anything, and allow her to chase me. Otherwise, bye Felicia.

With girls that you see LTR potential, you should be more intentional and clear. Relate to her as much as possible. Make an emotional imprint during the first few dates. Allow her to invest in you.

Hopefully, all of that makes sense and helps.


Modern Man Advice
 

SH03C

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OP this. After you do a meet up do not reach out first. If she doesn't hit you up that week or two then you have the answer. Guage her interest. She is wired to weed out thirsty guys
I do see this point too. For me it was just natural to do so as we’ve chatted everyday for the last two+ weeks and things had been progressing nicely. Furthermore, we had both agreed early on that we were looking for LTR.

IMO I think allowing for any distance to develop would do more harm than good. To many DJ’s point on here - women can sense bs so why project a sudden incosistency? But am open to listening to others perspectives.

@Modern Man Advice - Would these circumstances change the approach you mentioned above, as far as relating to being more intentional?

Thanks.
 
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Modern Man Advice

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I do see this point too. For me it was just natural to do so as we’ve chatted everyday for the last two+ weeks and things had been progressing nicely. Furthermore, we had both agreed early on that we were looking for LTR.

IMO I think allowing for any distance to develop would do more harm than good. To many DJ’s point on here - women can sense bs so why project a sudden incosistency? But am open to listening to others perspective
@Modern Man Advice - Would these circumstances change the approach you mentioned above, as far as. relating to being more intentional?

Thanks.
It is one of those things where there really is no one-size-fits-all. Every girl is different, they may be wired subconsciously the same but since they live moment-to-moment-feeling-to-feeling it is your ability to read her fluctuations and act accordingly that will give you an edge and set you apart. Most guys approach every girl the same way and have the its-a-numbers-game mentality (which it is if you are trying to spin plates).

I am against becoming available for the sake of games. You are unavailable because you genuinely have hobbies, friends, projects, and a purpose you are on the path to fulfilling. Truth is, women are not stupid, they know when you are low-value, and unless they are just in for the fun, they will vet you out, QUICK. So playing games is not only not a male trait but it won't serve you long-term when it comes to LTR.

In my opinion, be intentional and clear with this girl. Just make sure you are not overinvesting and allow her to reciprocate. Don't make her your focal point or have an expectation for it to work.

My mantra is: Anything I've lost, I wasn't meant to have. Anyone I've lost wasn't meant to be in my life.


Modern Man Advice
 

SH03C

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It is one of those things where there really is no one-size-fits-all. Every girl is different, they may be wired subconsciously the same but since they live moment-to-moment-feeling-to-feeling it is your ability to read her fluctuations and act accordingly that will give you an edge and set you apart. Most guys approach every girl the same way and have the its-a-numbers-game mentality (which it is if you are trying to spin plates).

I am against becoming available for the sake of games. You are unavailable because you genuinely have hobbies, friends, projects, and a purpose you are on the path to fulfilling. Truth is, women are not stupid, they know when you are low-value, and unless they are just in for the fun, they will vet you out, QUICK. So playing games is not only not a male trait but it won't serve you long-term when it comes to LTR.

In my opinion, be intentional and clear with this girl. Just make sure you are not overinvesting and allow her to reciprocate. Don't make her your focal point or have an expectation for it to work.

My mantra is: Anything I've lost, I wasn't meant to have. Anyone I've lost wasn't meant to be in my life.


Modern Man Advice
Couldn’t have said it any better. Spoken like a master of the craft.

Thank you!
 
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