Ok im confused please help

[rottweiler_273]

Ok so I asked this girl out. We have been friends for 2 years but have become really close in the last 8 or 10 months. Her boyfriend,of 5 months, dumped her 2 weeks ago. I knew I should've waited longer to ask her out but people were doing it already and I though I'd lose her if I didn't so anyway. I asked she pretty much said no, it was a nice no but I'm not sure if it was a straight no or a no not yet our conversation went something like this [I'll call her B]
[after I had asked the question]
B:You really wouldn't want to go out with me,I do too much work and I'm not that fun to be with
ME:If I thought that was true I wouldn't have asked you,if you dont want to go out with me all you have to say is no
B:no no no its not that,Its just the last guy I went out with hurt me badly and we [meaning her and I] are great friends and I dont want that to be made different if things get awkward.
So did I ask too soon?
or was it a straight no?
sorry for it being so long

 

[rottweiler_273]

ok i see people ARE looking at this but plz leave a reply I really do need help with this

 

[musclyjerk]

She wants you only as a friend and the situation is practically hopeless - you will always remain her friend unfortunately.

The Muscly Jerk

 

[Plec07]

Mate I got no idea but I do know what your trying to do rarely works (going from the friend zone to boyfriend) all you can really do is stick around as her mate but carry on gettin others girls numbers and goin on dates with em. Maybe she'll realise then that she should take her chance and go for you because you have your choice and you picked her. Or maybe you two will carry on as friends and you'll find a new girl.

One thing is for certain, your not going to help yourself by hanging around waiting for her to make her mind up.

 

[The Shocker]

Welcome to the Friend Zone

Population: You.

 

[rottweiler_273]

Thanks for ur help guys
Since this I asked another girl out and she said yh

 

[jmm854]

I disagree with muscles on this post and pretty much anything else I've ever seen him write so pay no attention, not everything is as clear cut as he'd like to think.

She did turn you down. But let's think about why. Has she ever looked at you in a romantic or sexual manner? Doesn't sound like it. So naturally, just because you bring up the idea isn't gonna get her thinking otherwise. From what you wrote it sounds like she's really down on herself right now, but it didn't sound like getting together with her would be entirely out of the question either. But something big needs to change. You need to get her to think of you sexually.

Keep in mind, you are rolling the dice here. If you can't change her thought process about yourself, it's not going to happen. And the only way to accomplish this is to stop treating her like a friend. You stop treating her like a friend and you won't be friends anymore. So ask yourself, is this someone I'm willing to potentially not have in my life anymore for the chance to have something more than what we already got? In a highschool setting, I'll always say go for it. If you go to school with 1000 people you might see 10 of them once you graduate.

So, how do you change her thought process? Well, you've got some recovering to do. Shouldn't have just asked her to be your girlfriend like that, gotta stir up the pot a little bit first. But highschool girls have the memory of an elephant so it shouldn't be that hard. Your objective is simple and has already been posted on sosuave numerous times. Make her begin to feel like youre dating without actually comin out and saying it. How do you do this? Ask her to join you in whatever activities you so choose--and do them alone. Also, not saying you don't already, but dress nice and bulk up. I can't emphasize these enough. Yeah the whole DJ concept bullsh*t and techniques are great but more times than not a girl just wants someone that looks good and that they feel safe around. Take her places, spend time, get close when the opportunities present itself, and at some point you've gotta make a move. Just don't ever call hanging out with her a date until after you go for the kiss.

If you really want her than approach her from now on like you would any other girl except go really light on the neg hits.

 

[rottweiler_273]

Thanks fr this jmm
I do know she already finds me attractive [she told me] but over the last day or so I realised I didn't mind too much she said no. I found out another girl iked me and i like her so I am with her now Thanks for ecerything dudes

 

[michaelhctam]

Welcome to the Friend Zone

Population: You.

oooo ouch, but painfully true!

 

[GaryUranga]

I believe is he magic art of escaping the friend zone, it has to be really calculated tho and someimes it isnt possible.

 

[bigw]

Use some Kino, start showing more romantic interest, but if she doesn't like it - you're stuck in the friend zone bud.

 

[rottweiler_273]

I appreciate all the advice
But I don't need it now so feel free to post it for othe peoples benefit though
also what is Kino?

 

[bigw]

Kino is short for Kinaesthetic i.e. touching.

Kino is used to make a woman feel more comfortable around you, and more comfortable with your touch. It makes things a lot easier if they're comfortable around you

Don't overdo it, just light stuff at first - i.e. touching their hand when you make a point etc.