"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Oh the murky world of OLD

HenBogan

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So I picked up a woman off bumble, just for a hook-up last weekend...

She's just sent me the following message..

Hey mr grey, hows it hanging. So there is this guy I like and we "work well together" anywho I think he is up for a 3 way or potentially a 4 way...3 guys plus me...

Just wondering if youd be interested. X


To add... Initially this woman said she was looking for a relationship....
 
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"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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HenBogan

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ABORT ABORT ABORT
Ha ha ha...

This has actually made me decide to come off OLD for the moment..

The term "low hanging fruit" that I first read on here from keeps springing to mind..

But then again I am the one picking at them.. Interesting.
 

Augustus_McCrae

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So I picked up a woman off bumble, just for a hook-up last weekend...

She's just sent me the following message..

Hey mr grey, hows it hanging. So there is this guy I like and we "work well together" anywho I think he is up for a 3 way or potentially a 4 way...3 guys plus me...

Just wondering if youd be interested. X


To add... Initially this woman said she was looking for a relationship....
Did she have the 10,000 c@ck stare?

-Augustus-
 

RickTheToad

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So I picked up a woman off bumble, just for a hook-up last weekend...

She's just sent me the following message..

Hey mr grey, hows it hanging. So there is this guy I like and we "work well together" anywho I think he is up for a 3 way or potentially a 4 way...3 guys plus me...

Just wondering if youd be interested. X


To add... Initially this woman said she was looking for a relationship....
Aiming high I see...
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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HenBogan

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Aiming high I see...
Ha ha...

I was just looking for a hook up in all fairness but initially she said she only wanted a relationship..

We are all on journey and it's another lesson learnt.. Its about putting the pieces together...

It's all written on these pages but we have to go through these things and experiences for ourselves to grow.

It's taken me over 40 years to seek out a place like this and it's like being a child again, in many respects..
 

Alvafe

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It transpired, during further research analysis, that a guy she "really likes" suggested a gang bang and she thought of me first.... Ha ha ha..
I don't find this much of laughting matter, the disrespect is palpable
 

HenBogan

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I don't find this much of laughting matter, the disrespect is palpable
I find it amusing that someone wants to go exclusive and then they are suggesting they would like to have an orgy of sorts.

I have politely declined the offer and people's choice of sexual recreational endeavours are theirs to make
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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RickTheToad

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Ha ha...

I was just looking for a hook up in all fairness but initially she said she only wanted a relationship..

We are all on journey and it's another lesson learnt.. Its about putting the pieces together...

It's all written on these pages but we have to go through these things and experiences for ourselves to grow.

It's taken me over 40 years to seek out a place like this and it's like being a child again, in many respects..
You guys do not have to be on the same page intially, just the same chapter. Just remember for her to come into your frame, you do not go into hers.
 

HenBogan

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You guys do not have to be on the same page intially, just the same chapter. Just remember for her to come into your frame, you do not go into hers.
Your point on frame is a really good one and is often mentioned here; I had never heard of it before I joined…

Firstly I am working towards discovering more about my own frame; is it simply just being myself, I have always been happy with the person that I am. But that being said, I acknowledge that I need to add and tweak things…

I am now working out my life’s purpose, it appears to be a spiritual one.

In addition, I am now slowly removing the women that are orbiting my life; I have come off all dating apps… This recent online exchange brought me to that realisation…

A good friend of mine said imagine your life as a blank piece of paper, now for everything you have going on (in your life) draw a straight line across your page. For each and every line you draw the spaces between those lines gets closer and closer; to where you will have no space between them.

I now want to remove as many lines as possible, to reset myself, and then add value to my life, my kids, clarity on my purpose, regular gym sessions and get to a 9hcp.

Secondly I can say that I have 100% allowed the frame of my EX GFs to come to the fore in my past relationships, especially the last one.

One thing is that I need to stop repeating that what has gone before…

Sifting through the posts on here, some folk are so advanced on their journeys; it makes for interesting and enlightening reading and it allows me to accept we are all at different stages.

The key, for me, is to take on board that what I feel will be of benefit and therein I guess it’s trial and error..

Change your mind, change your world.

But to start with Frame is such an important aspect; thanks Rick
 

RickTheToad

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Your point on frame is a really good one and is often mentioned here; I had never heard of it before I joined…

Firstly I am working towards discovering more about my own frame; is it simply just being myself, I have always been happy with the person that I am. But that being said, I acknowledge that I need to add and tweak things…

I am now working out my life’s purpose, it appears to be a spiritual one.

In addition, I am now slowly removing the women that are orbiting my life; I have come off all dating apps… This recent online exchange brought me to that realisation…

A good friend of mine said imagine your life as a blank piece of paper, now for everything you have going on (in your life) draw a straight line across your page. For each and every line you draw the spaces between those lines gets closer and closer; to where you will have no space between them.

I now want to remove as many lines as possible, to reset myself, and then add value to my life, my kids, clarity on my purpose, regular gym sessions and get to a 9hcp.

Secondly I can say that I have 100% allowed the frame of my EX GFs to come to the fore in my past relationships, especially the last one.

One thing is that I need to stop repeating that what has gone before…

Sifting through the posts on here, some folk are so advanced on their journeys; it makes for interesting and enlightening reading and it allows me to accept we are all at different stages.

The key, for me, is to take on board that what I feel will be of benefit and therein I guess it’s trial and error..

Change your mind, change your world.

But to start with Frame is such an important aspect; thanks Rick
Dating apps are the devil. However, they do have their place. I'm a little concerned about STDs, so I tend to stay off them (since March). So say I am a bit too concerned, but to each their own. I did best on Jswipe (not Jewish, but they love non-followers I guess) and Bumble. As @Amante Silvestre said multiple times before, use their boost feature, delete account after a week or two and repeat. It works each and every time. Just becareful.

Always best to meet IRL. Focus on you and the rest will fall into place. Good health. Good food. Some exercise and working on your purpose; then you will be golden.
 

Spaz

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Why are you people still doing OLD?

Is it really hard for a man to move about and create his own social network?

A man must learn how to socially mix around on his own, he can't be an island forever.
 

RickTheToad

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Why are you people still doing OLD?

Is it really hard for a man to move about and create his own social network?

A man must learn how to socially mix around on his own, he can't be an island forever.
Some take the path to least resistance. IRL is much better and you, as a dude, are looked upon much better by your prospectives then online IMO. Shows you have a backbone to approach.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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HenBogan

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Why are you people still doing OLD?

Is it really hard for a man to move about and create his own social network?

A man must learn how to socially mix around on his own, he can't be an island forever.
It's an insightful post and true...

I have heavily relied on OLD, for a long time now.... I am instigating change.

In my previous life, everything revolved around my kids and ex wife.... Like a fool I gave everything up along the way in the thought I was being a better husband etc...

My social network is redundant, but I am putting things in place again...

I have joined my local golf course, regular gym classes and I am looking to connect with old friends... It does take time...

My days here are few indeed but in that short time you do appear to be an exception rather than the rule... And kudos to you for creating your own place in this life and the world around you..

That should be a goal for us all, but that ties into frame and inner belief... Strength in a world where we (men) are being cajoled and herded into the feminist trap...

This whole subject, not just OLD, is truly fascinating...
 
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