"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Off and On -> Steady - How?

omgwtfm8

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Off and On -> Steady - How? [UPDATED - Read my reply]

Obv. this girl is amazing in many ways.

I've met her thru a friend.

First day we met, we had a blast, swimming in my pool, BBQ'in, then cuddled and watched a movie.

She's been out of a 18 month relationship still not over him, it's been awhile though, and I was still fighting my ex at the time. We started hanging out a lot, then I made the worst decision ever and got back with my ex. That didn't work out, I starting seeing HB9.5 again, then she got back with her ex. That didn't work out either and we start seeing each other again off and on.

Months go by of just several occasions casually just hanging out, running into each other all the time. Calling, txt'ing, commenting, wall posts, parties, shows, and just recently, New Years eve.

We spent the whole time with each other and our friends at a party, ending up crashing and cuddled through the night. I felt very very close to her, got along extremely well and I would like to pick up the pace and have more of that.

I need tips on increasing the amount of time I spend with her. We've been on and off for the past 4 months and I want something more steady with her, We've kissed before at parties, kiss-close before. It's off and on though.

Any Advice?
 
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"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Jay Jay

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Proceed with Confidence.

Dude, DUDE!

Its a pretty fair call to say if you cuddle thru the night with a girl she is well into you.

Go for it bud.

Its looking good.

Call her and ask her out. When you guys are having a good time kiss her.

Simple

JJ
 

omgwtfm8

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Why is it like this though:

I see her off and on, so we'll hang out after not seeing each other for like one month, it feels amazing, we get along like we've known each other for years, the night feels magical, etc.

The next days are always confusing. We both play slow responses to txt, phone tag, etc. Then I always feel lost and so confused. Then it would be a break. I really want to ask her out for a date like this friday, but I'm trying to get into a conversation with her first and today. We've just been phone tagging. I texted her just now that i'm home and to call me back. Now I haven't heard anything and it's been a little while. I feel so confused. Do you think she's afraid to call me for some reason? She can be shy sometimes. She never tells me about her feelings towards me. I never told her my feelings towards her either.

I need advice on how to fix this problem. When should i tell her how i feel about her?
 

stuartSan

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There's this new Nike advertisement I just saw.

Basically it's this kid. He loves football. Whenever he plays, he always gets scolded. In school, his girlfriend shouted at him for not spending time with her. He ignored her and played. At a housing area, the residents shouted at him for making noise. He ignored them and played. At a field, his mom shouted at him because she was there to fetch him home. He ignored her and played. At work, his boss scolded him for playing at work. He ignored him and just played.

In a competition at the end, he shoots and scores a nice goal. Then their famous motto 'Just Do It' appears.

I guess it applies to you.
 

ryannath

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Would a woman with high interest not call you often, not return your texts/calls? I think you know the answer. She has low interest.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Jay Jay

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Sounds like shes as confused about your behaviour as you are about hers.

Gp for it buddy. It sounds like she really likes you and is just waiting for you to be the man and take the lead.
 

sexy_kuta

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your the rebound.

if its the same chick as before, you're the REBOUND
 

omgwtfm8

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Okay, Indeed I am being rebounded! I just found out she hung out her ex the day after New Years w/ me.

Can I be mad? She used me, we shared a very emotional night cuddling the night away, cheek to cheek, arm around each other, talking, flirting, cuddling, sleeping, etc.

How should I respond? Her response is to ignore me and drive me crazy and then I find out what's going on.

She's not going to call me until her ex goes back to school or hurts her feelings...

Her ex boyfriend calls her crying all the time and she gives in because she's afraid to move on. She's done this back and forth a bunch of times. Do I confront her now or wait until she tries to contact me again?
 

MissionX

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LoL real suddle Dapper.

Buddy, just ask her how she feels about you, if she says she doesn't know take it as she likes you but she is confused, you may be giving her mixed signals.

Ask her out, do the deed what ever. Just don't be as rash as dapper man lol....

Although dapper, you're reminding me of someone.... My old self lol haha before I met my fiance.

Love you all
Payne
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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MacAvoy

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Dapper said:
The next time she goes for cuddles - go for real:rockon:
Exactly stop being her cuddle bunny and be a man and fvck her, thats why she keeps goin back to the ex, cuz he fvcks her brains out whereas you only cuddle.
 

sexy_kuta

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well man what is your purpose? a LTR? or to have a one night stand? because for LTR ur chances are VERY VERY! slim. if u want a one night stand ur chances are fuking high! shes on a emotional rollercoaster, trust me i expeirenced this **** FIRST hand in the last 7 months!
 

MissionX

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Haha Kuta's right. **** the **** outa her. :p

Payne
 

Fortunate_Juan

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MissionX said:
LoL real suddle Dapper.

Buddy, just ask her how she feels about you, if she says she doesn't know take it as she likes you but she is confused, you may be giving her mixed signals.
DO NOT ASK HOW SHE FEELS ABOUT YOU. Assume she likes you.

Ask her out, do the deed what ever. Just don't be as rash as dapper man lol....
Haha Kuta's right. **** the **** outa her. :p

Payne
You're all over the map son...

Although dapper, you're reminding me of someone...
You're reminding me of some one.
 

MissionX

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Haha I change my opinion about something pretty quickly, why tare me up man? I did nothing to you lol
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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sexy_kuta

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listen, shes a keeper to her ex, not u, she doesnt like u, shes thinks U are her ex. shes tryin to get her mind off her ex by using U but in the end she will either find a new guy or go back to her ex, chances are her ex. the girl who rebounded me, her ex cheated on her 5 times, yet she still went back. what i highly recommend is DONT GET ATTATCHED< trust me! i got oneitis for over 6 months,.

but if uwant, and i recommend it, pull moves, fuk her, then let it be, cuz either way shes not gonna stick with u if u keep on hanging out with her,
if u want to turn this into a LTR then tell me and i can help u out, give u the right steps to get into the RIGHT directions but i cant gurateed that it will work. these girls are harsh and it hurts man, when they leave u. they give u their full undivided attention and its like awesome then when she withdraw all of it and leaves u in the dust, ur on the knees wondering wtf happend
 

Fortunate_Juan

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MissionX said:
Haha I change my opinion about something pretty quickly, why tare me up man? I did nothing to you lol
I am not tearing you up. You set off my BS detector when you said "ask how she feels about you". You ruin the mood by doing that, it's like farting in the middle of foreplay. More importantly you take the mystery out of it.

And I think you should think about your response then give it, instead of blurting something out and saying the exact opposite 1 post later.

I am here to help, not to wage battles.
 

omgwtfm8

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I guess I keep thinking relationship relationship. I honestly held back fvcking her brains out on new years night just because I didn't want it to look like a one night thing. This is the first chick I actually have feelings for in awhile and I didn't want to lose em by moving too fast. (Lately I'm looking for something more serious)

Knowing that she's got her ex and me in her mind, How do I position myself for a next time. Do I just wait until she contacts me. Right now, She is just avoiding me. Our last time of contact was me missing her phone call and me texting her later to call me back when you get this. She hasn't done anything.
 

sexy_kuta

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omgwtfm8 said:
I guess I keep thinking relationship relationship. I honestly held back fvcking her brains out on new years night just because I didn't want it to look like a one night thing. This is the first chick I actually have feelings for in awhile and I didn't want to lose em by moving too fast. (Lately I'm looking for something more serious)

Knowing that she's got her ex and me in her mind, How do I position myself for a next time. Do I just wait until she contacts me. Right now, She is just avoiding me. Our last time of contact was me missing her phone call and me texting her later to call me back when you get this. She hasn't done anything.
man i dunno how to tell u, u need to be HARSH, i mean harsh, but respectful, u gotta come off cold cuz ur gettin attatched, which u DONt want too! so the next time she PHones u, talk to her, tell her you dont want anythign to do with her until she makes up her mind, and that u will give her how much time as she needs to make up her mind but in the mean time make it clear that you will be meeting new ppl(dating) dont say date, just tell her u gonna be meeting new people. tell her straight up as you can. dont beat around the bush, u gotta set the LINE now, before she crosses it. because right now she doesnt know waht she wants. she may be using u for attention, cuz i know shes already using u for something, to get over her ex. so dont contact her, let her contact U. after u talk to her, shes gonna keep contacting u, IGNORE those calls, i dunno man its hard if u wanna turn this into a relationship, if u want more tips, i was in the same shoes as u, check out my previous threads i think the last 10 are about my ex. its harsh man real harsh, u get sooo fuked over it aint even funny
 

omgwtfm8

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Next time me and this chick hang out, I'm not going to hold back from the hooking up. I think she needs a reason to leave. Not just knowing i'm there. She needs some smashing from someone else.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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