Not very good at treating women like s***!!!

[Triple X]

OK guys, listen up. Here is a problem I seem to be having - and I need some advice.

Like so many of us on here - I used to be a 'nice guy'. In fact it makes me cringe when I think back to my days of being a full-on chump. I was always 'too nice' and this used to be my downfall.

So nowadays I am a RAFC.. and day by day I am gradually increasing in confidence and strength, and most importantly of all - NOT TAKING SH*T. From anyone.

We have all heard the cliches. 'Treat em mean, keep 'em keen', 'Women like bad boys', 'Women love to be treated like sh*t' etc. So I thought I'd try and put this into practice (not too much, obviously. But just subtly, to see the effect it has)

So here's the problem - I'm really not very good at treating women like sh*t. I have no experience in this field (!) and I don't seem to be able to do it very well at all. I'm still generally a nice person and I'm not good at 'being bad'.

In a lot of my recent interactions with women I have tried to include a bit of 'talking down to them' into my game, ie with the purpose of establishing myself as superior, and most importantly the PRIZE. Not being rude... but things like calling them on their sh*t, laughing at them when they f*** up... things like that.

But... all I seem to be managing to do is p***ing them off. Don't get me wrong I'm being subtle and only doing it when necessary.. but it seems to be anything but beneficial when it comes to gaming them.

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For example I am talking to this girl (OK its via email but whatever, it still counts! lol) and the conversation is going fine, pretty damn flirty. But when she asks me what I thought of something she did, I responded with something ****y along the lines of 'yeah you were good, but not quite good enough yet for my standards'.. something like that.

What happens? The tone of the conversation COMPLETELY drops. She is offended and basically tells me to go f*** myself (in a more polite way). She then proceeds to cut off the conversation pretty instantly.

(Hardly onto a winner there..)

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Another example: A girl at work tries to TELL me I have to answer the phone, often (when it could be anyone). So when she says 'its yours, mate' I say back 'Don't think so, MATE' blatantly taking the p*** and refusing to do what she says. What happens? An argument (even though I was joking and not too bothered, she gets enraged and starts getting at me even more).

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OK so these aren't the best examples, but they're the best I can think of right now. The point I'm making is everytime I try and treat a women 'bad', like they supposedly want, all they seem to do is take offence and then not speak to me so much (or even at all). It certainly seems to be detrimental when gaming them.

Yet we've all seen these pricks who beat their women regularly, constantly put them down... and they LOVE IT!! So what I am doing wrong?? Do the women not respect (or even fear) me enough?? Or do I need to be 'nice' and respectful after all?

What's going on? Can anyone enlighten me?!?

 

[Bonhomme]

Are you serious?

I may be responding to a joke post, but I'll play it straight nonetheless.

You're putting the cart before the horse.

The sexy "bad boys" don't get women becuase they treat them like crap, they treat them like crap because they get them so easily. Just as super-hot women can get away with treating some guys like crap.

See my comment on this thread: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=76208

 

[arutha]

Email isn't the same, those things (IM) don't let you convey your meaning, tone of voice and stuff like that. I use them a lot but I'm starting to realise IM sucks compared to talking in person.

I don't know, I think you have gone too extreme and need to lighten it up a bit and be funny as well as 'rude'. Theres a fine line, say these things lightheartedly with a grin on your face and it seems to be a lot better than just saying it straight out, because that does make you seem angry, rude or whatever. Strike the balance between the humour in it and the ****iness.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Re: Are you serious?

Originally posted by Bonhomme
I may be responding to a joke post, but I'll play it straight nonetheless.

The sexy "bad boys" don't get women becuase they treat them like crap, they treat them like crap because they get them. Just as super-hot women can get away with treating some guys like crap.

See my comment on this thread: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=76208

I don't think this is a joke. He's from England.

The women in England are a totally different breed than in north america. Those stupid games of "C+F", "neg hits" etc only work on stupid fuked up north american women for the most part because they are immature, messed up and respond to games. Real women don't respond well to games.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Originally posted by Triple X
Yet we've all seen these pricks who beat their women regularly, constantly put them down... and they LOVE IT!! So what I am doing wrong?? Do the women not respect (or even fear) me enough?? Or do I need to be 'nice' and respectful after all?

What's going on? Can anyone enlighten me?!?

Let me clue you in on something.

YOU DON'T WANT THOSE GIRLS WHO LIKE THEIR MEN TO BEAT THEM UP AND CONSTANTLY PUT THEM DOWN

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Originally posted by Triple X
Yet we've all seen these pricks who beat their women regularly, constantly put them down... and they LOVE IT!! So what I am doing wrong?? Do the women not respect (or even fear) me enough?? Or do I need to be 'nice' and respectful after all?

What's going on? Can anyone enlighten me?!?

Let me clue you in on something.

YOU DON'T WANT THOSE GIRLS WHO LIKE THEIR MEN TO BEAT THEM UP AND CONSTANTLY PUT THEM DOWN

 

[the_great_gaia]

the reason why you are failing at this is because.. you're trying too hard. When you be mean to a girl, it has to seem "natural", don't try too hard. When you try too hard, you over-do it, so pissing girls off. Try being mean in a 'nice way', if that makes any sense. And be mean sparingly, like when they say something stupid like "Where's the food, in the kitchen?" That was a very dumb question, if you smell food cooking. being mean can get the job done, but you want to not care. Don't try to be mean, you WILL over-do it. just... DON'T CARE, then being mean will come natural for you. That's when fvcking will be essential for you in these situation, I would know...

 

[Triple X]

Re: Re: Are you serious?

Originally posted by TillTheEndOfTime
I don't think this is a joke. He's from England.

The women in England are a totally different breed than in north america. Those stupid games of "C+F", "neg hits" etc only work on stupid fuked up north american women for the most part because they are immature, messed up and respond to games. Real women don't respond well to games.

Haha.. nah it wasn't a joke. I mean it took me half hour to write - so yeah I'm serious!!

Yeah I do live in England but trust me we got f***ed up women over here too! I think it seems to be a kinda universal thing. So the same techniques must surely work. I guess the only difference is they don't have the ridiculous overload of self-confidence that American women have. lol

Thx for comments guys.. I mean this isn't like a massive issue in my life or anything like that... just something I've found recently and needed advice on. The point I was making was that any time I (deliberatly or not) have treated a girl like sh*t, she normally responds with contempt. Nothing more.

I know what some of you guys are saying about needing to lighten up or stop 'trying too hard' etc.. trust me its not like that, really! I just occasionally 'experiment' during interactions with women to see their reactions. I do TRY and be humorous or light-hearted.

It's just so far in my experience, being a little mean does nothing to increase interest level. Even tho the saying is 'treat 'em mean, keep em keen'.

I've found it to be 'treat 'em mean, keep em away'.

 

[Jake-inator]

You're not really treating women like ****, you're just being mean.
It so easy to see through.
Like purpesfully telling her to pick up the phone?!?
LOL that was funny, but it made you look like a little brat. I would have just ignored her and kept doing MY JOB.

Then i would have taken it out on the b*tch for being lazy...

Something along the lines of:
"Why didn't you pick up the phone?!?! didn't you see that i was busy!??
When are you going to learn some responsibility?!?"

Yes, there are fu*ked up women who will enjoy being told what to do and put down. Trust me you don't want them.

All a bad boy is a guy who doesn't go out of his way to talk to girls. He gets girls, therfore he has no need to act like a chump and do thing for them.
It's all about mystery, and making her wonder why you're not like all the other chumps who won't leave her alone.

It's definately not about being an assh0le, although if you're good looking you can get away with that.
Plus if you truly don't care, it shouldn't affect you... If a girl b*tches at me, i tell her something back or completely ignore her and talk to other girls.
I think you're still obsessed over actually getting a girl... you need to see the big picture.
Whatever Happens happens and you walk away with your balls. If she doesn't like it, too bad for her. Talk to another girl.
Don't ever let a girl have power over you no matter how much that sucker inside tells you too.


Don't be mean, be bad.

Treating women like sh*t doesn't mean dissing them to their face.
It's more about them being wortheless and you taking advantage of them.

Let them figure out that you don't give two fu*ks about them and NEVER EVER EVER back down...

Always twist the situation around so that socially it is HER fault for whatever little power game she played. She'll then appologize to you,
because she was wrong for starting that bull**** in the first place.

 

[Q-Pid]

Treat anyone like **** and they'll think you're a prick.

Neg hits should be used sparingly or they'll become annoying.

 

[Marf]

lol...

well what I usually do is that I misinterpret things any girl says, such as come, it, etc... it's funny as hell and they laugh most of the time ...this makes it seem like all they are thinking about is sex: which is a total opposite of what "society" thinks that women think. WHEW...that was weird wasn't it? lol

Now this is just an example; im not telling you to follow this like a slave or anything... the key is to be funny but at the same time be a arrogant/****y, u know... and being funny is mostly about being witty (saying something unexpected), k?

 

[Triple X]

Haha I wont be your slave Marf, don't worry.

But yeah, thx for the replies once again guys. So the key is to be funny first, right?? The ****iness comes second. I can certainly see some sense in that. And Q-Unit I completely agree, even tho this is exactly what these females are supposed to love (f***ed up I know)..

And Jake-inator.. where I'm from a 'bad boy' is not just a guy who doesnt go out of his way to talk to girls...that's just being aloof. A 'bad boy' is someone who gets in trouble or displays 'bad' behaviour.. like a criminal/drug dealer type. Someone who leads a dangerous lifestyle in other words.

And I mean damn, I'm from England and we don't even really have GUNS here so God only knows what it takes to be a bad boy in America!!

I agree with what you guys are saying about mystery, keeping your balls, standing up for yourself etc. This stuff makes sense.

Maybe I'm doing it wrong.. but David D always says basically to act like a jerk. He claims the woman may initially think 'who is this a$$hole?!?' but at the same time become mysteriously attracted and not be able to figure out why.

Personally this hasn't worked for me. I will just continue to treat women accordingly and as they deserve. But if I need to be an a$$hole - I will!!!!

 

[Jake-inator]

I see where you might get the idea that you have to kill people to be bad in America... but not every bad boy that girls go after is a criminal.

To be bad just means to do what you please.
Basically the opposite of an AFC who does everything society tells him to do.

This is a bad boy:
http://www.askmen.com/dating/curtsmith_100/126_dating_advice.html


How to be a bad boy:

Dial up the independence
Act as if you couldn't possibly care less about getting women. Never change who you are to please a woman or in the hope that you'll get her into bed. Get involved in your own life and your own interests. Make plenty of time for male stuff. Your attitude should be: "This is who I am -- if you like it, fine; if you don't, leave."

Don't show emotions
Be indifferent and don't show you care. You should have a poker face at all times. Remain mysterious and don't let women know what you're thinking. Keep them guessing.

Furthermore, ration your words and make sure everything you say has a purpose. Don't volunteer information. Simply answer a question if asked.

Put the kibosh on crap
Refuse to tolerate any female BS. When she tries to test you, don't give in -- tell her to grow up. Don't be afraid to say "no." Stand your ground, or simply walk away from a situation.

Get her off the pedestal. Run the relationship by your rules, not hers. If you don't agree with her, say so -- don't be a doormat in the hope of getting laid. And if she doesn't like it, show her the door.

Light your fire
Bad Boys are all about sexual confidence, and women appreciate confident lovers. So don't be afraid to let your natural masculine sexuality shine. This doesn't mean you should go around leering at female chests all day, but you should be comfortable and confident about letting a woman know you're attracted to her without becoming a pawing jerk. And when you do step up to the plate, make sure you know what you're doing in the bedroom.

Make yourself scarce
For women, guys who are too available are boring. Bad Boys are selfishly independent -- they aren't desperately hanging around women, hoping to get tossed a few scraps of attention.

Women always want what they can't have, so make yourself busy and scarce. Be a mystery man. Be unpredictable. Be a challenge -- let her do some work to get you.

Turn on the confidence
Bad Boys always assume that women want them -- insecurity has no place in their personal vocabularies. This is the exact opposite of the usual male desperation. So your attitude should be that you're the catch, not that women are doing you a favor by talking to you.

You can't afford to be too nice -- catering to women, agreeing with every word they utter, paying for female attention (all things Bad Boys don't do) -- because women see this as "weak" and wimpy.

Be decisive and don't hesitate when talking. Don't second-guess yourself after you've made a decision. Voice your opinion and don't worry about offending others.

Once you get this stuff you'll be a chick magnet.
You'll have girls asking YOU out.

 

[Triple X]

Hmm... very interesting stuff man. Thanks a lot.

 

[Joe The Homophobe]

Triple X, maybe you're taking women too seriously?

so you used the C&F and one girl told you to F*** off. Now what did you expect and how is this bad? how do you know she got angry at the C&F when this conversation of yours was by email? she told you to f*** off but i bet she was thinking about you after that!

the common mistake of newbies is that if C&F doesn't work once they immediately think they are being too rough on girls. A girl shows an undesired response and immediately the guy turns back to his afc nice guy self
"oh my i think i offended her! oh my im so sad im so sorry maybe i should stop using c&f, damnit im an idiot i wanna punch myself"

STOP THAT, DON'T BACK DOWN! remember that all women are different and women are illogical creatures that can't reason very well. Keep using C&F and don't tone it down. If one girl gets pissed it means you need to keep it up! the hard to get *****es won't fall for C&F right away, you have to slowly break their defenses!

 

[Triple X]

the common mistake of newbies is that if C&F doesn't work once they immediately think they are being too rough on girls. A girl shows an undesired response and immediately the guy turns back to his afc nice guy self
"oh my i think i offended her! oh my im so sad im so sorry maybe i should stop using c&f, damnit im an idiot i wanna punch myself"

Haha... no those weren't quite my thoughts.. lol.. but I get what ur saying. And the email thing was just used as an example - its the best I could think of at the time - but there have been plenty of 'real-world' examples too.

If anything I've come to realise its not the treating like sh*t/being ****y that is important, it is ESTABLISHING YOURSELF AS SUPERIOR/THE PRIZE. Everything else (the ****iness etc) stems from this and this is what matters most.