"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Not "Alpha" Yet

AlexKaiser

Don Juan
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So, I've been taking the advice. Working out now, going on longer walks, eating less garbage. Going to buy nicer clothes. Money is still a major limitation in terms of improvement (can't do much with $120.00 of post-rent Money). And of course, doing the DJ things with women, and shedding the skin of the nice guy.

Thing is, I'm not a person that makes girls turn their head and smile when they see me. No messages out of the blue from girls I haven't met. I can't do that "i'm THE King" thing where I just approach a girl and literally own her and suck her and her friends into my world. I can't dethrone alpha girls or 10/10s and have their panties dripping within an hour.

Basically I'm not even at a level where I can notice improvement. Fresh start. I've got a ways to go before that.

So the question is, what the hell do I do in the meantime? I can't just approach my intended targets right now because they have other choices, they have options, and those options are a hell of a lot further in the game than I am. Their life currently revolves around ****ing hot girls and getting drunk and high. Mine revolved around just making myself as independent as possible.

How do you believe you are the prize? Like, not in the delusional way that gurus try to inspire you to believe where you pretend to be valuable with nothing to back it up? I basically spent a good 16 years of my life believing I was not, and it became a habit to believe I was eternally beta, an evolutionary dead-end. Conquering this negative thinking ain't something I actually learned how to do. So, how do you convince yourself you are a prize that girls can actually desire?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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MrOctober

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All your targets are going to have other choices.

I'm curious. What's the deal with these targets? Without serious detail
 

AlexKaiser

Don Juan
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All your targets are going to have other choices.

I'm curious. What's the deal with these targets? Without serious detail
Girl 1 is pretty to say the least. Employed at a pizza place. Not a BPD but currently rubber-banding back to her BF who works at the gym who dumps her to slay other girls. Currently working out at the gym he's employed at, I don't think he has any idea that I want to get a piece of his ex-gf. I used to check up on her, ask her how she's doing. Wonder if she's okay. The basic beta supplicating. Thing was, she actually kind of liked it, then I learned from you guys that it's going to kill my chances of ****ing her so I just stopped talking to her completely. She wonders where I went but haven't talked to her at all yet.

Woman 1 is a mother of 2, country girl, who gets annoyed by her husband taking her for granted. Opened up to me a couple times at work, let me take a peek underneath her shirt once, winks at me when she gets a chance (she's friendly with a lot of the workers there but she's most friendly with me). Thing was, I was studdering and nervous the first time I saw her and apparently that endeared to her or whatever. I've since kept my flattery and stuff toned down. She gave me her number, she asked me to call and I haven't yet because no money to do anything. Just inviting her over to my place to **** would seem too direct?
 

AlphaNate

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OP's targets are irrelevant.

OP, you're on the right track. It's not going to happen overnight. My advice is always the same: get out there and fail.

The more you fail while improving yourself, the stronger your frame gets. Once your frame is high-value, women will put themselves in your path.
 

MrOctober

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You have to be direct with either one at some point. Pitch the idea of them coming over. Worst case scenario they don't act and you can go back to not talking to her like you already have.

Woman 2 sounds more promising. Married or not. I'd subtly pitch something to her. Just randomly a "so when you gonna come hang out".
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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lizardking82

Master Don Juan
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You do not convince yourself. You work on your goals and on your things (I would personally suggest spending a lot of money on nice clothes will not even affect the ***** as much as you think it does, but anyways, that's my personal take on this specific thing). Work on you and when you start to actually become a prize, you will definitely feel like one.
 
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