Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Nobody can hurt you like a woman

bigneil

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I've dated bisexual women since 1992 so the subject is boring to me, but the other night my favorite girl (who of course is bisexual - yawn) said something that was really eye opening.

I approached the subject by saying "So, we've dated 5 months now to the day, and you've told me about some men who you've loved, but you never mentioned any women..."

She said "Yes. I'd rather not talk about them. You know, with men you always know what to expect, but a woman can hurt you in ways that a man never could."!

She is a stripper so consider she has access to unlimited men and women. Her comments are testament to the fact that the men tend to be at her beck and call while obviously the women (one of whom she pursued originally enough to go see her at a strip club where she joined) not so much.

This is a woman who insists that she never experienced the concept of jealousy about a man (which I disproved personally, but still). She isn't someone who often admits to experiencing heartache, but the moment I mentioned women, it was like she was too hurt to discuss it.

This makes a lot of sense, but for fun I thought readers could clarify what they think she meant: how can a a woman hurt you worse than a man?
 
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Milano

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Or she just wants to look cool by claiming bi as we men like the idea of girls doing it :)
 

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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Women USUALLY hurt others more than men, but the most painful experiences are always FROM men though. To answer your question 'why?', here is why:
because they commit to it in ways most men don’t. Men usually prefer more direct ways of achieving their goals.
Women commit to manipulation in ways most guys don't. But read further:
But the best con artists are men for a reason. When men commit to being good manipulators they destroy even the best women.
She just hasn't been burned by the best guys, because the best men do not go for strippers usually.
 

SmooveMooves

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Someone once said women were the best teachers a man would ever have on this life. That is true. I thought I was smooth sailing master of my domain until I was crushed by a woman not too long ago. I thought I was a DJ. I thought I knew who I was. How the game goes. Wrong. After brief sadness I retook the reigns of my life and climbed to another level. Now that woman couldn't so much as breathe the same air in a room as me. I've become better. And it's thanks to her.

I agree with you and your bisexual lover @bigneil. Even if she's lying because she's not really bi.
 

Trump

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This makes a lot of sense, but for fun I thought readers could clarify what they think she meant: how can a a woman hurt you worse than a man?
Men are more direct in their manipulation. Women use subtle techniques; victimization, threat of abandonment, emotional abuse, all which are hard for men to see because having sex with a beautiful woman clouds their judgment.

In 2017 men are disposable. Women matter. The law and society is always 100% on the woman's side. If she decides she wants to hurt you, she knows nothing can stop her because she has her backup. Brutal to a man in Facebook/Snapchat/Twitter/Tinder era.
 
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Urbanyst

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Its because women always attack the ego. They go for your weak spot.

They make themselves important in your life by building you up. This is how they seduce you and make you fall for them. Then they break you down later to control you.

Think about this. If your boss at work told you how amazing you are at your job every week for a month, you would probably start to think you're the sh*t right? Then one day he comes in and rips you apart and says he can't believe he ever hired you. How would you feel?

Now if he never built you up to start.. it would be a wash because you would just go to work every day without much ego.

The trick is not to let your ego get big when women build you up. What goes up must come down. If you want to keep your frame you can't worry too much about what women think about you. But to show you how skilled women are... they will be quick to call you "emotionally unavailable" or "creepy" if you seem too aloof with them. They are pretty relentless with their attacks on your ego.

Your best defense is to know what they are doing so it doesn't effect you too much. Having a lot of other options is also a good way to keep them in check.
 

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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Someone once said women were the best teachers a man would ever have on this life. That is true. I thought I was smooth sailing master of my domain until I was crushed by a woman not too long ago. I thought I was a DJ. I thought I knew who I was. How the game goes. Wrong. After brief sadness I retook the reigns of my life and climbed to another level. Now that woman couldn't so much as breathe the same air in a room as me. I've become better. And it's thanks to her.
This is in the Bible:
Do you not realize that because she drives you nuts from wanting to be with her, that she is compelling you to improve yourself? To know yourself better, to become more confident, to rid yourself of those flaws that you feel she exposes every time you come anywhere near her?

I believe that her role in your life is to make you a better man. Were it not for her, you would be an ignorant fool still bumbling around in darkness. Her presence is capable of lifting you up higher than you could ever have imagined. And thus her presence is a double-edged sword. You cannot have her, you will not have her, at least not at this stage in your life (we are probably talking about anytime within the next five years, if at all), because if you DID then you would not be compelled to improve.

Therefore.

Let her disappear.

You cannot succeed until you do.

cynetix
 

Urbanyst

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This is the Bible
Do you not realize that because she drives you nuts from wanting to be with her, that she is compelling you to improve yourself? To know yourself better, to become more confident, to rid yourself of those flaws that you feel she exposes every time you come anywhere near her?

I believe that her role in your life is to make you a better man. Were it not for her, you would be an ignorant fool still bumbling around in darkness. Her presence is capable of lifting you up higher than you could ever have imagined. And thus her presence is a double-edged sword. You cannot have her, you will not have her, at least not at this stage in your life (we are probably talking about anytime within the next five years, if at all), because if you DID then you would not be compelled to improve.

Therefore.

Let her disappear.

You cannot succeed until you do.

cynetix
I think this is a bit of a stretch. Makes it sound like men have no motivation unless there is p*ssy involved.

This is not totally true. A lot of great men have stayed single for life and were not primarily motivated to improve themselves because of women. If that is the only thing that motivates you to improve yourself you need to do some serious soul searching. That is not healthy at all.

I'm naturally competitive and a lot of times I push myself just for the satisfaction of accomplishing something. I don't care if there is p*ssy at the finish line or not.
 

WanderingMan

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I agree with a lot of what's said here. However, I feel this comes down to one thing. Your bi-sexual friend can control men rather easily, but not so much other women. Once she gets involved with them, she's undoubtedly got her hooks in them and she knows, in one way or another, that she'll always have the upper hand in the relationship. However, with women, it's probably different for her. She may be an AFC in that regard haha.

Plus, a few theories: as it sounds, she's probably the "woman" in the female/female relationship dynamic. Therefore she's the submissive and therefore she gives up control to the other. Plus, there's always the risk of losing a woman to another man, something she virtually as NO control over. Women's emotions change with the wind. When it comes to other women and relationships with her, I'm willing to guess that a lot of them are just temporary until a better MAN comes along.
 

sch

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Men are more direct in their manipulation. Women use subtle techniques; victimization, threat of abandonment, emotional abuse, all which are hard for men to see because having sex with a beautiful woman clouds their judgment.
That tricks are hard for men because we're just not used to them. We can't even think that women can cry to manipulate us.

The counter measure is to not get your ego involved, and judge women by her actions.
 

Chamber36

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It's because we as men (and even women aswell) tolerate much worse behavior from women than from men.

Check this out:


What's going on here?

If a man were to act like that, they wouldn't be tolerated one second. For some reason the range of acceptable behavior from women is just a bit broader in our society.

That being said, the only thing I have to add is this ancient african proverb I heard from my Ghanaian friend: "If you give her the key she will drive you crazy".
 

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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It's because we as men (and even women aswell) tolerate much worse behavior from women than from men.

Check this out:


What's going on here?

If a man were to act like that, they wouldn't be tolerated one second. For some reason the range of acceptable behavior from women is just a bit broader in our society.

That being said, the only thing I have to add is this ancient african proverb I heard from my Ghanaian friend: "If you give her the key she will drive you crazy".
Damn I saw that last week, ***** was screaming like the devil man, looked like she was posssessed or some ****.
 

bigneil

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The best men do not go for strippers usually.
The best men also aren't 17 living with their mom, so your input on this subject as it relates to 46 year old men is getting old. Get a job.

Men are more direct in their manipulation. Women use subtle techniques; victimization, threat of abandonment, emotional abuse, all which are hard for men to see because having sex with a beautiful woman clouds their judgment.

In 2017 men are disposable. Women matter. The law and society is always 100% on the woman's side. If she decides she wants to hurt you, she knows nothing can stop her because she has her backup. Brutal to a man in Facebook/Snapchat/Twitter/Tinder era.
True, but in this case I'm talking about a woman who was hurt by women.

Is she lying about being bisexual? God, I hope so.

I once made fun of gay people (saying LOL is gay) and she got offended and said her first love was a gay woman.

So I (jokingly) said "Ok, I won't make fun of gay people anymore, but just to be clear: I can still make fun of black people, right?" and she said "Ok, but my first love was gay and black!"

Also, she said she dated bull-dyke type women before, and she reminds me of another girl I dated who dated a bull dyke woman (for 20 years). So I'm afraid she is indeed bi.

So who better to get insight on how evil women are than from a woman who is attracted women?
 

bigneil

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In the end its the simple opinion of a stripper.
Not an argument. You are disagreeing with her? Or dismissing anything spoken by a woman too hot for you to get a date with?

I agree with a lot of what's said here. However, I feel this comes down to one thing. Your bi-sexual friend can control men rather easily, but not so much other women. Once she gets involved with them, she's undoubtedly got her hooks in them and she knows, in one way or another, that she'll always have the upper hand in the relationship. However, with women, it's probably different for her. She may be an AFC in that regard haha.

Plus, a few theories: as it sounds, she's probably the "woman" in the female/female relationship dynamic. Therefore she's the submissive and therefore she gives up control to the other. Plus, there's always the risk of losing a woman to another man, something she virtually as NO control over. Women's emotions change with the wind. When it comes to other women and relationships with her, I'm willing to guess that a lot of them are just temporary until a better MAN comes along.
Exactly. This was what I was leaning toward.

Further evidence she is bi: our first kiss was 3-way kiss with another girl. Always ask or the 3 way kiss if you find yourself with 2 beauties btw.

Get this: on our next date, I have the 23 year old Russian girl (who I once brought to the club of and is in love with my favorite girl) scheduled to randomly show up at our dinner table.
 

bigneil

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Big Neil, i actually agree with the stripper.

For who else but a woman can hurt you so much by, say, sleeping with another man and then telling you about it while you're in love with her?

Only a woman would be so evil to do that. A man could never be able to hurt you on such a level.
Well it's true that a man couldn't hurt me on such a level because I don't have sex with men.

But if you are referring to her having a ONS the first month we dated, and your Muslim faith of arranged marriages forbidding her from doing such a thing (then again you may have thrown her off a building for being gay in the first place), note that a week prior I had told her I had sex with another woman - who was 19 - on my girlfriend's birthday - which is why I didn't call her that day.

So the idea she was diabolical because she's a woman and didn't automatically commit to me in October doesn't really apply.
 

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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The best men also aren't 17 living with their mom, so your input on this subject as it relates to 46 year old men is getting old. Get a job.
Of all the things to pick out, you only look at the negative. It probably hurts to realize that despite all the money you throw her, she will never love you Neil. Plus, if this hurts your ego, it is you admitting that you are not a top tier man. Grow a pair.
 

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Hey Bradd80,
I know this is usually a no go but I had a bad breakup with an ex. Literally ignored her for sixty days after and she never saw anything from me except hearing stuff from her best friend who happens to be dating my best friend. I never post on Facebook hardly ever or instagram so that's why she never saw anything regarding my life. I get two Snapchats about a week ago from the girl and just opened them and ignored them. Any advice on working my way back in without seeming to over zealous.
 

bigneil

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Hey Bradd80,
I know this is usually a no go but I had a bad breakup with an ex. Literally ignored her for sixty days after and she never saw anything from me except hearing stuff from her best friend who happens to be dating my best friend. I never post on Facebook hardly ever or instagram so that's why she never saw anything regarding my life. I get two Snapchats about a week ago from the girl and just opened them and ignored them. Any advice on working my way back in without seeming to over zealous.
They have this thing called PM. Not Tylenol PM. I mean Private Message. And just because his name is Brad doesn't necessarily prove he is gay, so stop hitting on him in public.

Of all the things to pick out, you only look at the negative. It probably hurts to realize that despite all the money you throw her, she will never love you Neil. Plus, if this hurts your ego, it is you admitting that you are not a top tier man. Grow a pair.
How you think you can make that generalization is beyond me. She already loves me. I've already had the best relationship of my life. She taught me what making love was. No, you can't take that away from me. The money I spent on our dates is negligible - it's less than my third job paid in a couple of weeks. Can you imagine having THREE jobs when you still have zero? How did I get a third job? By the stamina I gained having a girl 25 years my junior. As Robert Greene in Laws of Power reminded us: money is power. Pay what things are worth.

Try going out in the world and supporting yourself and providing a value to the world and earning enough to support a woman, and try staying in shape enough that you can keep dating the girls who are your age now. Then come back and tell me who grew a pair.
 

bigneil

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Special thanks to ImTheDoubleGreatest for underscoring what Vox Day outlined in his book "Social Justice Warriors Always Lie".

In adage 2 he notes: "Social Justice Warriors Always Project".

When ImTheDoubleGreatest (ad nauseam) whines about "She'll never love you despite your spending money" this is Projection 101. What he is really admitting is "Women will never love ImTheDoubleGreatest until he gets a job". This is why ImTheDoubleGreatest will clench his fists and stomp his feet some more: he knows deep inside that no matter how many great ideas he has, no matter how much virtue signalling he shamelessly spews, no matter how many Likes his alternate accounts give himself, he ultimately has to get off his as-s and go out and move matter - to provide a service to others besides 17 year old philosophy - or women will continue to point and laugh.
 
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