I've asked this girl to out twice so far. First time we grabbed lunch, movie, then went to the park. During that day, she asked if i wanna get more people or if i should make it a "me and her" time, of course i picked the latter. We had some kino at the park that day and that was about it Second time she came over and we watched movies at my house, we walked my dog together and had a little kino. Though those weren't considered official dates, I wonder how she felt about it. Right now I am thinking of taking things an extra step. What should I do to make it seem like it's more of a date than just us two hanging out together?
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
No Official Date
- Thread starter Oni
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
RogueWarrior
Don Juan
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Good question. What are people's criteria for a date? When a girl says "I'm dating this guy..." does that mean she's hanging out with him or f*cking him?
Ya that's what im trying to get at. I want the situation to be "im dating this guy" rather than just hangout u know? I also want to show her that im interested, but i also need her to show me that she is as well.RogueWarrior said:
It'd be safe to say that once you two are fvcking regularly (assuming she's not fvcking other guys during this time) and spending a good amount of time together, you're dating. It's more of an implied thing that happens naturally rather than "would you like to date?"
edit: Don't confuse this with an Fbuddy.
edit: Don't confuse this with an Fbuddy.
Well the thing is, when we spend time together, I don't know if she's seeing me as just a "friend" or something more. I guess what I'm kinda looking for from her is some type of reassurance. She never had a bf before nor had she dated other guys.Sadao said:
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
It usually takes a few "Actionless" dates before she considers you a friend, most women throw you into that category only after you've failed the "something more" test. I'd guess that right now she sees you as something more if she asked if you wanted to invite other people or spend time just the two of you. I do highly suggest not waiting long before making a move though, unless you want to be that friend of course.
edit: keep the flirting and kino high, try not to have conversations that she would be having with her friends, but rather someone she'd want inside her
edit: keep the flirting and kino high, try not to have conversations that she would be having with her friends, but rather someone she'd want inside her
Holding, holding hands, kissing, etc etc. I'd avoid basic conversations that you'd have with your grandmother, and don't quiz her. It's kind of counter productive for me to give you a "cookie cutter" conversation to have, so just try to have a fun conversation that you feel would spark interest in her or allow opportunities for you to chime in and impress her. I'm sure you'll do fine, just remember the building blocks of all of this rather than focusing on little specific insignificant things.
Oh that reminds me. What's a good way to initiate holding hands. What if i grab her hand and she doesnt like it, things would be pretty awkward after that wouldnt it? Also, when watching movies, do people wait until the girl lean on them before wrapping their arms around her or just do it sporadically, I've always have a hard time with it.
don't be so generic, this isn't the movies.
if you grab her hand and she pulls it back, say something like "GOOD I DIDNT WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND ANYWAY!" in a joking manner. Like I said, don't over analyze.
if you grab her hand and she pulls it back, say something like "GOOD I DIDNT WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND ANYWAY!" in a joking manner. Like I said, don't over analyze.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Haha you are right, I guess i think too much, I need to get over that. Thanks!
I was reading the forum the past few hours and somethings i found out was you always want the girl to express her feelings to you before you do, is that right? But I was thinking, what if the girl is shy and conservative, wouldn't that be impossbile then?
I was reading the forum the past few hours and somethings i found out was you always want the girl to express her feelings to you before you do, is that right? But I was thinking, what if the girl is shy and conservative, wouldn't that be impossbile then?
It's not impossible. For a DJ, nothing is impossible. If you make the right action based moves and heat up the relationship through your actions, she'll counter-act that by bringing up her feelings to you. It will happen trust me on this just be bold but use DJ smoothness.
I see, by actions it would be things like kino, flirting, etc right?Charm said:
I come to realize that whenever after i end a day with a girl, i always come up with things that i SHOULDVE done which would have made things much better for me, it occurs so much. Anything i can do to help me improve that?
alright so today, we met up again and we fished. i made her laugh a lot and when we were at my house, there was some light kino when we were playing around with my dog. thats about it. i think i should've done more, but i didn't. damn. next time i guess.
I.A.F.Y.B.
Master Don Juan
Does she like you or your dog?Oni said:
Next time kiss her then, you will know where you stand.
Better to fail than regret.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
i want to! i jsut cant seem to find the perfect timing for it.I.A.F.Y.B. said:
that's what im afraid of. i need to pull off something good next time.Max Power said:
anyone know if there's anything i should say the next time i see her?
penkitten
Master Don Juan
why don't you just kiss her?
Gangster Of Love
Master Don Juan
Like on the lips.Oni said:
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.