"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

No Contact and One Up manship

HeadLightsOn

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 17, 2011
Messages
419
Reaction score
78
Just thought Id get some opinions on this.

I have been with a FWB girl for a year. She has hooked up with a new 'boyfriend' and is now devoting the majority of her time to him (fair enough).

Because she was quite deeply into me - at an emotional level - she is now trying to 'teach me a lesson' by trying to make me jealous - txting me about him, talking to me about him etc (we no longer have a FWB arrangement).

So... I am thinking about going full NC. That way she will get the message that I am not interested in the friends club thing.

However I have always thought this method is a bit childish, eg I would rather carry on to her as if Im having a good time/normal life, rather than coming across to her as angry etc... if I am like that, she wins.

Problem is she still contacts me for 'coffee' etc.

How would you suggest I overcome freezing her out completely (and looking like I am pissed at her) VS looking as though Im carrying on with life as normal?

Thoughts appreciated.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

bigneil

Banned
Joined
Oct 20, 2006
Messages
8,265
Reaction score
2,644
Location
Texas
Sounds like you ended up in the Friend Zone, unless she's trying to make you jealous.

I recommend No Contact for a while, then Limited Contact if you really want to stay in touch. However that might only prolong the agony.
 
Joined
May 25, 2011
Messages
51
Reaction score
0
If I were you, I would just tell her you are busy when she contacts you for coffee, dont offer any alternative date. And move the F**k on with your life. You don't have to go no contact with her, just dont initiate contact and when she contacts you be short and to the point and dont offer the opportunity for her to develop a conversation. Find yourself another girl, there are billions out there...
 

HeadLightsOn

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 17, 2011
Messages
419
Reaction score
78
bigneil said:
Sounds like you ended up in the Friend Zone, unless she's trying to make you jealous.

I recommend No Contact for a while, then Limited Contact if you really want to stay in touch. However that might only prolong the agony.
Funny, a couple of days after your post, I have just received a txt from her. Very descriptive and sexual. Know what I think? She wants to keep me around in case new BF doesn't work out. Heck if we just agreed we were FWB and NOTHING else I would be good with that.

I just want to maintain the upper hand. Hmmm this could make for an interesting diary log...
 
Top