Spinning Spinning
Don Juan
Smart move you put yourself in a very approachable position in the type of place where you're likely to be approached and let the rest take care of itself. I like it.
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
Nightclubs-Difficult Environments
- Thread starter jglide123
- Start date
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
I agree with this. The type of bar you go to makes a huge difference. The places you want to avoid are the "downtown" bars that attract everyone in the metro area. You'll be competing with every other guy in the city, and the b!tch shield with these chicks is almost impenetrable. This is where a lot of social circles gather as well for special occasions such as birthdays, bachelorette parties, etc. In other words, these girls are there for reasons other than a ONS.Espi said:
Local bars that have live music (as Espi mentioned) are absolutely your best chance at a ONS. Reason being, these girls are usually low key, probably live in the vicinity, and your social value can be pretty decent because the place probably isn't going to be a meat factory.
The one thing you want to be careful of in local bars is reputation. I've had to take a hiatus from one of my local hot spots because some of the bartenders have caught on to my shtick. They've never said anything to me, but I've gotten some dirty looks because I usually only have one beer, chat up a few girls, get the numbers, and I'm out of there. Many times I've done it twice in one night. Another time one of the girls I was making out with happened to be a waitress from the restaurant side of the bar (unbeknownst to me). I've seen that girl in there at least twice, lol.
Don't try to talk to women at clubs, go right into dancing with them
The last time I tried to talk to women at a club I got rejected like seven out of seven times. I have gone to clubs since then, but didn't try so much to talk.
The last time I went to a club, I didn't try to talk to them. I went with friends and several girls, got a table and in fact had the club setup a table right in the middle of the dance floor. Then proceeded to really look happy and enjoy the time with my friends. This built my status up a bit and also my confidence, I was having a good time dancing away with my friends and looking important (whether I am or not).
So that's phase 1.
Phase 2 I just went up to the most attractive girl and started dancing with her, you gotta have balls to do this and sometimes I do and sometimes I don't but this night I did. She didn't scream or run or anything but I was doing all the work and could tell it wasn't taking. She wasn't resisting and in fact moved along decently, but I was still putting forth 100% of the effort so I could tell she was a little uncomfortable. But of course I remained a gentleman.
So what I did I do next? I grabbed her friend who I found pretty as well and proceeded to dance with both of the them at the same time. I think she felt somewhat reassured from that, I was trying to send the message that I'm just trying to have fun. They'd move along with where I lead them but they didn't put any effort into it and it broke up after a short while.
So in the end it didn't work but I never said one word to them and never got a verbal no, it just wasn't taking. The place was loud and you need to sometimes just be confident and use body language. Don't try so much to talk. If a girl takes to your dancing then she'll eventually lead you to the bar to have a drink and you can talk then. I've gotten there before but it still doesn't generally end up back at ones place. I think getting to home plate is more a function of what city you're in.
Other guys tried dancing with them later in the night but they all left alone... They weren't really looking for guys in my opinion. So I didn't feel so bad and still had a great night.
The last time I tried to talk to women at a club I got rejected like seven out of seven times. I have gone to clubs since then, but didn't try so much to talk.
The last time I went to a club, I didn't try to talk to them. I went with friends and several girls, got a table and in fact had the club setup a table right in the middle of the dance floor. Then proceeded to really look happy and enjoy the time with my friends. This built my status up a bit and also my confidence, I was having a good time dancing away with my friends and looking important (whether I am or not).
So that's phase 1.
Phase 2 I just went up to the most attractive girl and started dancing with her, you gotta have balls to do this and sometimes I do and sometimes I don't but this night I did. She didn't scream or run or anything but I was doing all the work and could tell it wasn't taking. She wasn't resisting and in fact moved along decently, but I was still putting forth 100% of the effort so I could tell she was a little uncomfortable. But of course I remained a gentleman.
So what I did I do next? I grabbed her friend who I found pretty as well and proceeded to dance with both of the them at the same time. I think she felt somewhat reassured from that, I was trying to send the message that I'm just trying to have fun. They'd move along with where I lead them but they didn't put any effort into it and it broke up after a short while.
So in the end it didn't work but I never said one word to them and never got a verbal no, it just wasn't taking. The place was loud and you need to sometimes just be confident and use body language. Don't try so much to talk. If a girl takes to your dancing then she'll eventually lead you to the bar to have a drink and you can talk then. I've gotten there before but it still doesn't generally end up back at ones place. I think getting to home plate is more a function of what city you're in.
Other guys tried dancing with them later in the night but they all left alone... They weren't really looking for guys in my opinion. So I didn't feel so bad and still had a great night.
WORKEROUTER
Master Don Juan
I have mixed feelings about clubs. I like bars/pubs to pick up. Haven't put much time in the night clubs over the past few years. I will admit though that the chicks are dolled up more and more aesthetically appealing. Good topic.
jglide123
Don Juan
Great Advice Remote Control.
As you stated, seduction is very important to women. However, seduction generally takes time, and most nightclubs are so loud that it is hard to talk to women for a long time without straining your voice. Sure, you could pull her to a more quit location, but if she came with friends (must girls do), they will usually be wary of their friend being led off by a stranger (hence, the c0ck blocker is born). I like going to clubs alone, so I don't have the benefit of a wingman to placate her friends.....These are just a few obstacles which make clubs challenging for me.
I've come to the conclusion that in order to maximize your success in nightclubs, you must be strategic and have a strong and assertive frame. As many guys have already stated, you must be willing to crash and burn, to go for broke, and you should never take rejection personally....
As you stated, seduction is very important to women. However, seduction generally takes time, and most nightclubs are so loud that it is hard to talk to women for a long time without straining your voice. Sure, you could pull her to a more quit location, but if she came with friends (must girls do), they will usually be wary of their friend being led off by a stranger (hence, the c0ck blocker is born). I like going to clubs alone, so I don't have the benefit of a wingman to placate her friends.....These are just a few obstacles which make clubs challenging for me.
I've come to the conclusion that in order to maximize your success in nightclubs, you must be strategic and have a strong and assertive frame. As many guys have already stated, you must be willing to crash and burn, to go for broke, and you should never take rejection personally....
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"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
in my opinion gaming at clubs isnt the most efficient way to use your time and energy, only because of the noise level. i like it though because its just fun, and i usually have no expectations for the outcome of the night.
the fun part for me is just dancing with random HBs and having some laughs. this one time i approached two HBs by doing some really funny/stupid dance moves to the song umbrella by rihanna.. they both started laughing and immediately formed a circle. then afterwards i got all up n clsoe grinding with one of them on the dancefloor but not much conversation because of it being so loud
the fun part for me is just dancing with random HBs and having some laughs. this one time i approached two HBs by doing some really funny/stupid dance moves to the song umbrella by rihanna.. they both started laughing and immediately formed a circle. then afterwards i got all up n clsoe grinding with one of them on the dancefloor but not much conversation because of it being so loud
PrettyBoyAJ
Master Don Juan
Heres some extra game I'm going to give you guys. Free of charge.
This just dawned on me but it really is common sense. Most of my success in the club area has been at the bar area. The girls on the dancefloor want to dance and be attention wh0res. If you get a girl at the bar area then the music won't be as allowed. You can look her in the eye and just spit that ism. She will be more likely to remember you and the conversation.
I've noticed that the majority of the Good pulls I received during the last couple of parties I have went to have come from the bar area. Now I don't buy drinks at the bar at a party (too damn expensive) but I'll just be around the area chillen and watchin sports.
So simple yet so deep.
This just dawned on me but it really is common sense. Most of my success in the club area has been at the bar area. The girls on the dancefloor want to dance and be attention wh0res. If you get a girl at the bar area then the music won't be as allowed. You can look her in the eye and just spit that ism. She will be more likely to remember you and the conversation.
I've noticed that the majority of the Good pulls I received during the last couple of parties I have went to have come from the bar area. Now I don't buy drinks at the bar at a party (too damn expensive) but I'll just be around the area chillen and watchin sports.
So simple yet so deep.
marmel75
Master Don Juan
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I just posted about something I have been doing recently that seems to work most of the time really well...and I don't even use it to my advantage because I am married and just like screwing with their minds when I go out...
Basically just walk up to the bar and get a drink next to a spot with cute girl or girls, and just say something like "Hey what are you ladies up to tonight!" or "How are you ladies doing tonight!" Most of them will respond and then ask what you are doing, etc. Then just say whatever, like "I am out havign a few drinks with some friends, etc." Most of them will then just start talking about some other random stuff and then kind of zone them out and start looking around like you are not paying them any attention. In the middle of them talking, cut them off with "It was nice meeting you, we are gong to go find some pretty girls to talk to..." Then immediately turn and walk away before they can respond. After about 3 or 4 feet, turn back and give them a smirk or a devilish smile and wait for them to respond to it...some smile back, some will say "You are an a**hole!", etc...
Then go about your business...you will find these same girls will usually be stalking you throughout the club and will "run into" you a few times that night, usually commenting about how much "prettier they are than that other girl you were just talking to"...
funny funny stuff...wish I knew about it when I was single...
Basically just walk up to the bar and get a drink next to a spot with cute girl or girls, and just say something like "Hey what are you ladies up to tonight!" or "How are you ladies doing tonight!" Most of them will respond and then ask what you are doing, etc. Then just say whatever, like "I am out havign a few drinks with some friends, etc." Most of them will then just start talking about some other random stuff and then kind of zone them out and start looking around like you are not paying them any attention. In the middle of them talking, cut them off with "It was nice meeting you, we are gong to go find some pretty girls to talk to..." Then immediately turn and walk away before they can respond. After about 3 or 4 feet, turn back and give them a smirk or a devilish smile and wait for them to respond to it...some smile back, some will say "You are an a**hole!", etc...
Then go about your business...you will find these same girls will usually be stalking you throughout the club and will "run into" you a few times that night, usually commenting about how much "prettier they are than that other girl you were just talking to"...
funny funny stuff...wish I knew about it when I was single...