Nice without AFC

[inzone50]

When you want to say something nice or do something nice for your girlfriend without being afc what do you do?

 

[onyx]

carry her purse while shes shopping

 

[inzone50]

carry her purse while shes shopping

thats afc.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

thats afc.

Ya think???

Give a complement that doubles as a behavior enforcer. It needs to be specific enough so that she can replicate the action. More times than not the complement is genuine and not not misconstrued as supplicant.

There's a woman I'm seeing who makes sure that she's wearing a nice dress and shoes with her legs are smooth and silky whenever we're together, even if we are just going to hang out at home. It started when I complemented her on wearing sandals with heels instead of those slouchy flip-flops during the summer months.

I told her I like the way that the heels accentuate her calf muscles. It got to the point of me giving her a calf check under the table during dinner. I tell her that I like the smoothness of her skin. Long story short, she goes out of her way to make sure her legs are presentable to me and I let her know that I approve. It can be looked upon as a game that we both enjoy playing.

 

[Norisman]

Their is nothing wrong with being nice to women... Its AFC to be consistent and predictably nice for the sole aim of obtaining ur GF "soft spot". In other words, it OK to be volatile with your behavior, because in doing so, your niceties will be appreciated.
What I'm trying to say is, use push/pull .... hmmm... reward for good behavior and don't tolerate unacceptable manners.

This nice guy=AFC notion is encouraging lots of antisocial/distasteful behaviors!

 

[PrinceBeavis]

To me, it seems pretty afc to have to be worrying about every act of (reasonable) kindness.
If you're strong in yourself, just doing or saying something nice shouldn't be giving away your power. If we're that fvcking weak and pathetic, we should just give up.

 

[sexybeast]

This nice guy=AFC notion is encouraging lots of antisocial/distasteful behaviors!

This is a really good point.

 

[comic_relief]

Everything that an AFC does, can be done within a relationship. The AFC's problem is that they do it too early and is not a challenge.

Would I do some of the things that they do? No fvcken way!!! Could it be done? Yes.

comic_relief

 

[The Juan and only]

Everything that an AFC does, can be done within a relationship. The AFC's problem is that they do it too early and is not a challenge.

Would I do some of the things that they do? No fvcken way!!! Could it be done? Yes.

comic_relief

bingo

 

[Interceptor]

Here;s something that I think will really help in the early stages of the game.
This is something that is inherently AFC.
And these behaviors, and perspectives, which are BTW totally out of whack, are the "Red Flags" that women have when interacting with the poor AFC.

AFC are in LOVE with "LOVE". They want the excitement of "feeling" in "LOVE". And it's all an illusion. An unhealthy one at that.

They are Romantic, for the SAKE of "BEING" Romantic.
They place women on pedastles because they IDEALIZE Them, and place them above themselves, as if they were Godesses, not flesh and blood sexual creatures.
AFCs, by nature, (falsely, and mislead by their "feelings" of love), don't fall in love with the Woman. They fall in love with "LOVE" They are in LOVE with their "feelings", NOT the woman. The woman is simply a placeholder for the AFC to use for his injection of infatuation.
They don't REALLY "SEE" THE WOMAN.
They only SEE THEMSELVES, and how THEY "FEEL".
They are self centered. They are only concened with how THEY "feel".
They want a woman's validation.
They don't want a hot, sexual, fun, and adult relationship.
They want VALIDATION from a woman. Plain and simple.
They feel unworthy, awkward, and unconfident, and only awake when either a woman shows interest in them, or when they see a woman they are attracted to.
Some people say that AFCs "love like women."
Actually, I'm not positive on that one.
BUT I BELIEVE...
AFCs are in LOVE with feelings of VALIDATION, and the ILLUSION of "LOVE" and ROMANCE.


Some of women's (AFC) Red Flags early in a relationship:

Telling them ALL your feelings.
Telling them how much you "love" them. Even though you've only been together a few times.
Poems.
Flowers.
Candy. (all these things are NOT deserved for someone you just met! She KNOWS this! And she thinks to herself :"How does this guy NOT know this??! Is something wrong with him??Has he ever been with a woman? Why is he doing this? I would NEVER do this! Not with a guy I just met! He must be inexperienced. What a shame. Sorry, dork boy.. NEXT!!"
Corny speech. "I just love how your eyes are beautiful like the ocean! It makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside!"
Acting OVERLY "respectful".
NO Kino. Because , remember, do NOT touch the Godess! She's is not interested in Sex, by God! You are not worthy of her, dog!
Friendship oriented communciation. Meaning, NO sexy talk, or suggestive action, touching, teasing, or normal ADULT , and Maculine man behavior.
Talking about video games, Dungeons and Dragons, and how much you like to talk in the KLingon "language".

All these things, and certainly more, are red flags to women because they demonstrate your lack of experience with women. And especially...Sex.
You obviously demonstrate lack of knowledge of sexuality, and interaction with women.
You come off as being in "love" with her when you just met.
You display signs of being unworthy of her because of being overly complimenting on her, especially on her looks.
Being awkward interacting with her. I remember an episode of some reality dating show, and this poor dork was so NOT used to going out with women that he totally overdid the "Chivalry" thing calling his date "M' Lady" as if they were in the Medieival Era. Running to open doors and things He came across as a totally inexperienced, "finally a date with a real woman! I can't believe this is happening!" unconfident dork. She obviously was not attracted to him, and said that she thought the guy wasn't used to being with women.

 

[reset]

That's the Klingon language, Interceptor. Not Kingon. Jesus Christ. Star Trek is only like probably the most important science fiction shows ever created, Gene Roddenberry would be rolling around in his grave right now. "Kingon". Seriously. Show some respect.

 

[reset]

I mean how are you supposed to relate to somene... if you can't talk about what your interests and passions are? The girl needs a frame of reference to get to know YOU. So, say I'm out with a girl, and I order a house draft that I end up not liking so much. I may look into her eyes, with a wry smile, and say "this reminds me of the time when Han Solo ordered a synth-ale on the Hutt planet of Nar Shadda, and they screwed up his drink. He chokes it up, and he's like "what in the galaxy is this? You call this premium Hutt synth?" And the bartender is like, "our apologies sir. We accidentally gave you the drink that was forumulated specifically for that Ithorian symbiant over there in the corner... his protocol droid must have taken YOUR drink by mistake..."

I crack up, she looks at me and says "Ithorian.. what?" And I'm like "Hammerhead! Don't you remember Hammerhead from the Cantina on Mos Eisely? That's the name of his species! They have like two hearts... if Han Solo had drank anymore, he'd be dead long before Greedo could come and claim Jabba's Bounty on him! HELL-O??"

Some chicks are pretty dense man.

Sorry.

As usual Interceptor that was a great post.

 

[Interceptor]

Reset, you magnificent bastard, you.

You SO had me!


:crackup:

 

[reset]

.

Couldn't pass it up. Had to let the inner geek come out for a minute.