"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Nice Guys Finish First! (iqqi summarized)

P

punchitchewy

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iqqi said:
Guys, I'm an obese and lonely girl, but this is so personal I just have to write it on a public forum...

LAST NIGHT I SLEPT WITH SOMEONE UGLY! LIKE HOLY FVCKING SH1T UGLY!!!!

:rockon: :rockon: :rockon: :rockon:

That's right, UGLY. Read it. Like swamp man, but on a different level!

I was turned on by his facial deformities and lack of hygiene.

In the past he helped ease my voracious appetite for dough nuts and sweet sweet candy.

Last night, I needed a ride on someone's ****.

When I called he sounded tired, but I did the girly thing which is "oiiiiiink" and "I got all dressed up and now my pvssy is moist..." and used some bribes: "my friends are REAAALLY horny...", and after a 4 hours of deliberation on his part, he came and got me. His original plan was just to drop me off at the party, because he was afraid I would eat everything in his house if he brought me home and my flatulence was thunderous. But I talked him into coming back, so he went home, got w00d, and showed up towards the end.

He did some pretty AFC things at the party, like him and and his buddies ran train on every chick at the party. But he also did some DJish things, like he didn't think twice about the AFC things he did - he didn't care what anyone else thought, because he doesn't spend any time on any internet boards trying to figure out if he should be a nice guy or just run train on hoes. He came and grabbed me up to dance at the end when the party shut down...

I sprinted after him and tripped and fell in the mud (I was unbelievably wet at this point, and not from the mud.) :eek:

Some points to make, hopefully to answer any sosuave questions that I can foresee:

1. We did anal.

2. I have always had a little crush on him, because of the way he holds himself (Read: because of the way he jams his r0d into b1tches (see... looks DON'T matter). He is quiet, moral, and runs train like a pro.

3. DJ traits you'd all recognize: He can dance, really well. (Read: He has a 9 inch johnson.)

4. If he is such a nice guy, iqqi, why are you just NOW giving him the time of day???
A. I want to join his harem.
B. He is a good friend of mine's brother, and that gets me off. :eek: The only thing that gets me off more is siblings. This is the code.
C. He used to work for me and my ex. (Long story, he ran train on my ex).

5. Yes, there were other men there who were totally hot, and who wanted to get to know the iq. (Corpses, in other words.)


So the point I have hoped to get across, is that not only is Nice Guy a nice guy, but he is fugly (Fugly aka fugly). And he still got the girl (Fugly aka...whoops...) And the girl is eternally hungry...where are the pancakes...

Discuss, b1tches.
Click to expand...
Wow, iqqi. The quality of your posts has diminished somewhat recently...still quality stuff though: +1


(http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=135283 <-- original)
 
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"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

I

iqqi

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What an attention wh0re you are.

I am flattered, though. I have never had anyone do a parody of my posts before! And a pretty darned funny one, at that. But since this is a parody, it probably belongs in the AE forum, along with any other iqqi fan club posts. :)
 
M

Mad Manic

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To be fair to Iqqi, she was attracted to him and went home with him and had sex with him. If the girls who were attracted to me did that, I'd be a pimp. Usually they have an entorage of friends stopping them or indeed they stop themselves through BS rationalisations. So I'm glad he got laid tbh and I'm glad she didn't ruin his night with LMR or cvckteasing and whatnot.

MM
 
P

Play the Game

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Anyone can fvck a desperate fat chick... even nice guys. They call it bumpin' uglies. :rolleyes:

Unless you're shallow hall, i wouldn't call that finishing first.
 
K

Ken785

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punchitchewy said:
Wow, iqqi. The quality of your posts has diminished somewhat recently...still quality stuff though: +1


(http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=135283 <-- original)
Click to expand...
Please tell me Iqqi is a woman!....and if she is...shes obviously Bi...at the end she mentioned the guy ran a run on her exGF....

somebody clear this up for me...who is a guy and who is a girl in this story? or are they BOTH guys and they did anal??? IM SO CONFUSED!!!
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

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ketostix

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That's funny as hell because as ridiculus as it is there's a lot of truth to it I'm sure.
 
R

Randallpink83

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haha... I'm glad it was just a parody thread... the whole "But doesn't get me as hot as my siblings"... lol I seriously was blown away before I realized it was a joke... funny stuff.
 
P

punchitchewy

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iqqi said:
I should give your rep points for that. But I will save them for something better, since they only let you give them out once to each member. RETARDED!
Click to expand...
Hey iqqi, I think now's the time to give me some rep points HAHA

I'm amazed some people don't realize right off the bat that iqqi didn't really post that. Rep points for all of you.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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