Newest Dating Trend: The Bird Theory Test

[Tilex]

This video popped up on my feed last night. Have you heard about it recently?


What is the Bird Theory Test?

The Bird Theory test is when one person in a relationship points out something ordinary to their partner, like a bird. If their partner reacts with excitement and interest, they pass the test. If they dismiss it, they fail. Psychology suggests that these tiny moments of connection are very important in relationships.

TikTok Trend Explained: What Is The Bird Theory Test?

Clinical therapist Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP shares the psychological basis of this theoryThe Bird Theory has recently gone viral on TikTok, offering a simple way for people to test their relationships. But...

www.wikihow.com

 

[Barrister]

This sounds like something my ex wife would have been into.

I am focused working on a work project or a home project and then: "Oh wow, look at that bird!"

Me: "Oh yeah, that's a pretty bird."

<I keep working on what I was doing>

"You don't love me! You didn't take enough time to talk about the pretty bird with me! I want a divorce!"

More or less just another example of how soft our society and women specifically have become by getting pampered by psychologists and everyone else. My opinion is that this kind of sh1t is ridiculous and is the problem and not the answer.

 

[Bokanovsky]

This sounds like something my ex wife would have been into.

I am focused working on a work project or a home project and then: "Oh wow, look at that bird!"

Me: "Oh yeah, that's a pretty bird."

<I keep working on what I was doing>

"You don't love me! You didn't take enough time to talk about the pretty bird with me! I want a divorce!"

More or less just another example of how soft our society and women specifically have become by getting pampered by psychologists and everyone else. My opinion is that this kind of sh1t is ridiculous and is the problem and not the answer.

I like how towards the end of the interview, the "political psychologist" (WTF does that even mean?) says that the purpose of couples therapy is to help men develop capacity for conversation about intimacy. In other words, it's always the man who is the problem. No wonder women love couples therapy so much.

 

[BadBoy89]

The Bird Theory test is when one person in a relationship points out something ordinary to their partner, like a bird. If their partner reacts with excitement and interest, they pass the test. If they dismiss it, they fail. Psychology suggests that these tiny moments of connection are very important in relationships.

So if a woman points out an ordinary guy to her boyfriend, and he dismisses it, relationship over?

 

[BillyPilgrim]

This is all well and good until the chick gets insecure and starts doing this incessantly.

 

[MatureDJ]

This video popped up on my feed last night. Have you heard about it recently?


What is the Bird Theory Test?

The Bird Theory test is when one person in a relationship points out something ordinary to their partner, like a bird. If their partner reacts with excitement and interest, they pass the test. If they dismiss it, they fail. Psychology suggests that these tiny moments of connection are very important in relationships.

TikTok Trend Explained: What Is The Bird Theory Test?

Clinical therapist Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP shares the psychological basis of this theoryThe Bird Theory has recently gone viral on TikTok, offering a simple way for people to test their relationships. But...

www.wikihow.com

I'm naturally curious and would show interest in that - but it doesn't help me getting to the point of being with a woman to even have this question posed in the first place.

 

[Gamisch]

This sounds like something my ex wife would have been into.

I am focused working on a work project or a home project and then: "Oh wow, look at that bird!"

Me: "Oh yeah, that's a pretty bird."

<I keep working on what I was doing>

"You don't love me! You didn't take enough time to talk about the pretty bird with me! I want a divorce!"

More or less just another example of how soft our society and women specifically have become by getting pampered by psychologists and everyone else. My opinion is that this kind of sh1t is ridiculous and is the problem and not the answer.

Get used to those little shyte tests. Now it's a bird, next it's a bag to be carried, holding open a door, doing dishes, how enthusiastic you are when she talks about her soap series ect.

Most women operate like this, and you won't stop her from reading AND believing these theories.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

Interesting video. I find this to be true. Men do this in different ways (seek connection). If a man goes to his wife looking for sex because he has morning wood at 4am......he's sensitive to whether she accepts his sexual advance or rejects it. Engagement builds the connection, rejection tears down the connection.

More often than not my husband brings me a cookie or something if he gets a sandwhich (for example). Its not that I have asked for a cookie.....its a bid to connect. If I show appreciation for his gesture I'm engaging. If I reprimand him for getting me a cookie (wow, you know I don't eat that stuff) then I am rejecting. These things happen All. The. Time. in serious relationships and each bid you accept is a brick to build the relationship; each bid you reject is a brick you throw away.

Love is in the small moments folks. Its in small gestures & expressions of love day in & day out.

 

[Sega Genesis]

Love is in the small moments folks. Its in small gestures & expressions of love day in & day out.

So much this^^. Like (for example) when my boyfriend would come home with a cute pair of earrings he bought just cause....he was thinking of me at that moment and thought they'd look pretty on me.

No special occasion, again just thinking of me while he was out and about doing whatever (pursuing his purpose).

Note it was NOT the gift per se, it was him thinking of me at that moment that means so much. And I'd do the same for him sometimes.

The element of surprise can really keep a couple connected sometimes.

Re the article, like @BeExcellent I agree with it as well although it did state to not do this while your partner is immersed in something important like while they are driving or working. That's not the time to try and foster a connection.

But rather if you're out walking together or engaged in an an activity together and your partner notices something interesting (like the bird flying over or perched in a tree or something) and they point it out, you taking notice and an interest can mean so much.

Versus not giving a **** and dismissing the comment. I've had it happen both ways and the times when he dismissed it (again while we were out together NOT while he's engaged in a solo activity) felt quite deflating.

 

[Bible_Belt]

There is an old piece of research that analyzes statements made between couples and categorizes them as either positive or negative. This includes all communications, not just the ones that have anything to do with the relationship. The more positive the communication, the more likely the couple was to stay together. So if you think birds are stupid, just shut up about it.

 

[Bokanovsky]

More often than not my husband brings me a cookie or something if he gets a sandwhich (for example). Its not that I have asked for a cookie.....its a bid to connect. If I show appreciation for his gesture I'm engaging. If I reprimand him for getting me a cookie (wow, you know I don't eat that stuff) then I am rejecting. These things happen All. The. Time. in serious relationships and each bid you accept is a brick to build the relationship; each bid you reject is a brick you throw away.

You talk about your husband as if he was a dog

 

[BeExcellent]

You talk about your husband as if he was a dog

Ah - you still love me enough to insult me. How darling of you (roflmao)....

If you don't think operant conditioning is a thing then you are not paying attention. Humans respond to operant conditioning too. There is a reason Pavlov's dogs are classic human psychology.

We teach the same thing here.

People respond well to and seek rewards. That can be attention, sex, food, comfort, etc. All relationships and interactions operate this way. To think otherwise is foolish.

Positive interactions build comfort/connection/emotional currency. Wise people foster the positive & reduce the negative, and this is accurately predictive of relationship success.

Mine, yours, anyone's.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Ah - you still love me enough to insult me. How darling of you (roflmao)....

If you don't think operant conditioning is a thing then you are not paying attention. Humans respond to operant conditioning too. There is a reason Pavlov's dogs are classic human psychology.

We teach the same thing here.

People respond well to and seek rewards. That can be attention, sex, food, comfort, etc. All relationships and interactions operate this way. To think otherwise is foolish.

Positive interactions build comfort/connection/emotional currency. Wise people foster the positive & reduce the negative, and this is accurately predictive of relationship success.

Mine, yours, anyone's.

And you still love me enough to provide an extended response to a casual, semi-serious observation, lol.

Tell us more about how you use sex, food and comfort to control your hubby's behaviour.

 

[Sega Genesis]

Lightening things up a bit, this just happened!

I'm still at my brother's in the Sierra's (LOTS of birds) and I was out for a bit and must have left the door slightly ajar cause a bird flew in!

I noticed it immediately when I walked in cause I saw feathers in the doorway and then I saw the poor bird flapping around trying to find its way out.

My brother is working in another room but I yelled out "Pete!!! A bird flew in"!!! And he stopped worked immediately, ran in and got the bird out, poor thing it must have been so scared.

So I guess under certain circumstances bringing a bird to your partner's attention while they're working can be a good thing. Lol

At least it wasn't a bear! There are lots of bears here too and they'll enter your home and rummage through your kitchen and eat your food!

They're typically pretty harmless though.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Lightening things up a bit, this just happened!

I'm still at my brother's in the Sierra's (LOTS of birds) and I was out for a bit and must have left the door slightly ajar cause a bird flew in!

I noticed it immediately when I walked in cause I saw feathers in the doorway and then I saw the poor bird flapping around trying to find its way out.

My brother is working in another room but I yelled out "Pete!!! A bird flew in"!!! And he stopped worked immediately, ran in and got the bird out, poor thing it must have been so scared.

So I guess under certain circumstances bringing a bird to your partner's attention while they're working can be a good thing. Lol

At least it wasn't a bear! There are lots of bears here too and they'll enter your home and rummage through your kitchen and eat your food!

They're typically pretty harmless though.

Taking symbols literally to make an attention whoring post? Check.

 

[BeExcellent]

And you still love me enough to provide an extended response to a casual, semi-serious observation, lol.

Tell us more about how you use sex, food and comfort to control your hubby's behaviour.

Touche' my friend .

Cheers.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Lightening things up a bit, this just happened!

I'm still at my brother's in the Sierra's (LOTS of birds) and I was out for a bit and must have left the door slightly ajar cause a bird flew in!

I noticed it immediately when I walked in cause I saw feathers in the doorway and then I saw the poor bird flapping around trying to find its way out.

My brother is working in another room but I yelled out "Pete!!! A bird flew in"!!! And he stopped worked immediately, ran in and got the bird out, poor thing it must have been so scared.

So I guess under certain circumstances bringing a bird to your partner's attention while they're working can be a good thing. Lol

At least it wasn't a bear! There are lots of bears here too and they'll enter your home and rummage through your kitchen and eat your food!

They're typically pretty harmless though.

Wait, your brother is your partner?? I didn't realize that Ilhan Omar had an account on SS! lol

 

[Sega Genesis]

Wait, your brother is your partner?? I didn't realize that Ilhan Omar had an account on SS! lol

No course not silly lol. Just a somewhat relevant story I thought was funny. It had literally just happened!

@BeExcellent got the humor, thanks Be!

 

[Bokanovsky]

No course not silly lol. Just a somewhat relevant story I thought was funny. It had literally just happened!

@BeExcellent got the humor, thanks Be!

I'm just pulling your leg lol

 

[Divorced w 3]

This is a thing, I’ve had it be the slow corrosive burn on relationships. This is simply saying that your partner took the time to make conversation with you and you either receive that conversation or you swat it off. The bird is irrelevant, it could be any topic. The point is whether or not you respect your partner enough to listen to what they have to say. In other words, don’t be so egoistic that you can’t show curiosity to other thoughts besides your own.

Blow off enough bird tests and she stops getting naked for you and finds someone else who will pretend to care about birds.