I am a newbie here and sort of a newbie with women, but I am here because I would like to do something about it. Anyways a bit about me, I am 22 Latin guy from northern California I am college educated, I have a good job, nice car ( Infiniti G37s coupe =D) I work out often, am well read and can hold a conversation pretty well with most people, however I am extremely shy and introverted and am being constantly rejected by women.
So there is a girl I have been known and been sleeping with/dating since August of 2008. Anyways we started as F*** buddies back in Aug 08 till about the present. Intially I didn’t think nothing of our arrangement but about 6 months into it I caught feelings for her, I played it cool and became observant to her actions which to me indicated interest we also went on a dates, spent a weekend together, had a couple sleep overs. After going through all of this my feelings became a lot stronger, so about a month ago I told her how I felt. Her reaction was “wow” she seemed pretty stressed, she said she wasn’t ready for a relationship but really enjoyed spending time with me and cared about me, she also said if this would been another guy she woulda cut communication a while back ago, she also told me that I have been the only person she sleeps with since we first met, which after getting to know her well I believe. I didn’t bring up again for a couple weeks, in between that we still went on a couple dates and continued to sleep together. We would text almost everyday but I noticed it was sort of tapering down, I touched the issue again via email, she responded that she is fine how we are now and that if anything is meant to happen it will, with adequate time. This was two weeks ago, last week she wouldn’t answer her phone at all, so I called from another number, she answered and I told her it was no big deal she was pretty happy and invited me for lunch the next day. She cancelled lunch about an hr before and said she would call me after work, she didn’t. Now I texted her about 4-5 times this weekend and got nothing. I also texted her about a surprise I had for her (concert tickets to see a group she really likes and spend part of the weekend in Tahoe) she didn’t even bother to respond or inquire about the surprise. Today it has been 4 days since I have last contacted her I am planning on giving it about 10 days before I contact her again and try to surprise her with those concert tickets and those weekend plans. I just need some help here, I really like this girl I am not sure if I love her but man the insecurity of losing her is killing me so bad! In a way I feel that she thinks im clingy and that is pushing her away, but then again she got me used to texting/calling everyday because she would do that. Can you all give me advice? Do you guys think the strategy I have in mind is a good one? Should I try something else?
So there is a girl I have been known and been sleeping with/dating since August of 2008. Anyways we started as F*** buddies back in Aug 08 till about the present. Intially I didn’t think nothing of our arrangement but about 6 months into it I caught feelings for her, I played it cool and became observant to her actions which to me indicated interest we also went on a dates, spent a weekend together, had a couple sleep overs. After going through all of this my feelings became a lot stronger, so about a month ago I told her how I felt. Her reaction was “wow” she seemed pretty stressed, she said she wasn’t ready for a relationship but really enjoyed spending time with me and cared about me, she also said if this would been another guy she woulda cut communication a while back ago, she also told me that I have been the only person she sleeps with since we first met, which after getting to know her well I believe. I didn’t bring up again for a couple weeks, in between that we still went on a couple dates and continued to sleep together. We would text almost everyday but I noticed it was sort of tapering down, I touched the issue again via email, she responded that she is fine how we are now and that if anything is meant to happen it will, with adequate time. This was two weeks ago, last week she wouldn’t answer her phone at all, so I called from another number, she answered and I told her it was no big deal she was pretty happy and invited me for lunch the next day. She cancelled lunch about an hr before and said she would call me after work, she didn’t. Now I texted her about 4-5 times this weekend and got nothing. I also texted her about a surprise I had for her (concert tickets to see a group she really likes and spend part of the weekend in Tahoe) she didn’t even bother to respond or inquire about the surprise. Today it has been 4 days since I have last contacted her I am planning on giving it about 10 days before I contact her again and try to surprise her with those concert tickets and those weekend plans. I just need some help here, I really like this girl I am not sure if I love her but man the insecurity of losing her is killing me so bad! In a way I feel that she thinks im clingy and that is pushing her away, but then again she got me used to texting/calling everyday because she would do that. Can you all give me advice? Do you guys think the strategy I have in mind is a good one? Should I try something else?