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If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

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NEVER APOLOGIES

Ceaserofnone

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Ive made an observation and please correct me if im wrong as I dont think my theory is 100%.

Anytime you have made a mistake or not, as a guy you should NEVER apologies.

What ive noticed is that many men cheat and a lot of the times when the girl finds out she goes berzerk. This follows up with the dude apologising and grovelling at her feet. In the end she leaves him.

Now, as many on here know, women LOVE a man with options. So surely if a guy DOES get caught cheating then why do these chics leave their guys for it? My theory is that a lot of the times its *what follows* from the guy that leads to the demise of the relationship. IF the guy is overly apologetic and grovels, thats a huge turn off and the woman will be on her way. If however, the guy isnt apologetic understands he made a mistake but doesnt grovel or chase the woman pleading for her acceptance, then she will love him 10 X more.

In the same way, if out of anger you push/slap/spank your girl, she will scream the house down maybe even cry and say all sorts. IF the dude apologises profusely, shell just disrespect him that much more. IF however, you walk away without saying a word and WAIT for her to return she will be in love with you that much more.

Its not the bad behaviour that women hate but how a man acts after being exposed or committing that bad behaviour.

Let me know if Im getting this right.
 

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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In the same way, if out of anger you push/slap/spank your girl, she will scream the house down maybe even cry and say all sorts. IF the dude apologises profusely, shell just disrespect him that much more. IF however, you walk away without saying a word and WAIT for her to return she will be in love with you that much more.
I can verify that this is true through observations with my own mother. I have never once seen my mom ever kiss my dad. Not once. She used try to beat him, almost killed him many, many times. One day he hit her back after another awful beating. Only the first 4 fingers, and that was it. The next few days, tensions were high. But then suddenly, like a mother****ing switch, she became SUPER sweet and SUPER loving. About a week or two after that event, I saw her kiss him for the first time in my entire life. My siblings can vouch for me and will say the same thing.

The craziest part? None of my siblings nor I were sympathetic to my mother (she deserved it tbh). But what truly shocked me as how we were ally alking about it, and that it was my OLDER SISTER, a woman in her own right, brought it up and said “have you guys noticed how mom’s been acting a lot nicer to dad ever since he hit her?” And we all nodded. We talked about it. My dad came downstairs to the kitchen a while we were talking (we were in the kitchen), and we brought it up. My dad still felt so guilty but was sick of the abuse and I don’t think he apologized lol.

And get this, while we were talking to my dad about it, my older sister (again, a female herself, AND not even my younger sister; it was my OLDER sister), she said something I will never forget till the day I die:

“Why didn’t you hit her earlier?”

Yeah. So moral of the story, you can abuse and hurt a woman as much as you possibly want, and can do it in the cruelest of ways. But if you’re still a MAN when you do it, she will STILL be attracted to you, ALWAYS. ****’s so ****ed up man...
 

Black Widow Void

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I wish that your theory didn't hold a lot of truth, but from my personal experience, it does.

If I f*ck up and it's with one of my pals, I'll own it. In fact, if I feel bad, I'll even say I'm sorry.
It then becomes the past and forgotten.

Unfortunately, (so far with my experience) the same outcome does not apply with women.
With women, when I've admitted any wrong doing... instead of moving forward, it's like handing them a branding iron. And this 'branding iron' ... to them, never has an expiration date.
 

MrWood

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I had a bitchy LTR, and one day she simply told me I should tell her to shut up when she is being a *****.

Learned alot that day.
 

zekko

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Too rigid.
Apologizing does not equal groveling. Don't grovel.
Apologizing should be rare but I wouldn't say never. Some people apologize habitually, don't do that. And don't beat it into the ground. Do it once and be done with it.
 

bcude

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Yeah. So moral of the story, you can abuse and hurt a woman as much as you possibly want, and can do it in the cruelest of ways. But if you’re still a MAN when you do it, she will STILL be attracted to you, ALWAYS. ****’s so ****ed up man...
This, right here. Women forgive cheating, but they don't like it obviously. They only like the feeling that her man COULD cheat since he's a man in demand with options.

I think it's dangerous to tell yourself NEVER to apologize though, sometimes we cross a line and we know we did so we own up to it, what is wrong is the excessively apologies and saying sorry all the time.
 

Xenom0rph

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Donald Trump never apologizes and he's the ultimate alpha male and the POTUS....


....Apologetic nice guys finish last.....dont be a nice guy, be a winner.....
 

Who Dares Win

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I agree with the message, women are often fine with bad guy but they are never fine with weak guys and awfully in the insignificant moral of women apologizing is a sign of weakness since they only do it when they cant afford otherwise.

I can also relate with the doublegreatest's example, I kid you not I shouted at women and even kicked them out of my house in night time and shout even more when they hit the doorbell...the only things I got were *******s, cooked breakfasts and a serious decrease in drama the following days.

Their hamster powered brain still works as if we were in the stone age.
 

gettinit

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I have no problem apologizing if I do something stupid, but it ends there. No groveling. We all screw up. It could be a bad day, lack of sleep, lapse in judgement, bad choice of words and maybe some alcohol in the mix.
That said, I won't ever apologize if only SHE thinks that I did something wrong, just to smooth things over. If she legitimately did something that doesn't sit well with me, I tell her about it and if she gets upset, too bad. I no longer stand for any BS and have found that if you don't make this clear early, you will be dealing with endless nonsense and a complete loss of respect. I just dealt with this sort of thing recently and low and behold, three days after my "non" apology for sternly calling her on her BS, she reached out to me, sweet as pie. If she hadn't reached out, I would take it that her interest level wasn't high enough to continue anyway.

The bottom line is: If I act like a D**k, I'll own it and apologize. Otherwise, not a chance.
 

Ceaserofnone

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I can verify that this is true through observations with my own mother. I have never once seen my mom ever kiss my dad. Not once. She used try to beat him, almost killed him many, many times. One day he hit her back after another awful beating. Only the first 4 fingers, and that was it. The next few days, tensions were high. But then suddenly, like a mother****ing switch, she became SUPER sweet and SUPER loving. About a week or two after that event, I saw her kiss him for the first time in my entire life. My siblings can vouch for me and will say the same thing.

The craziest part? None of my siblings nor I were sympathetic to my mother (she deserved it tbh). But what truly shocked me as how we were ally alking about it, and that it was my OLDER SISTER, a woman in her own right, brought it up and said “have you guys noticed how mom’s been acting a lot nicer to dad ever since he hit her?” And we all nodded. We talked about it. My dad came downstairs to the kitchen a while we were talking (we were in the kitchen), and we brought it up. My dad still felt so guilty but was sick of the abuse and I don’t think he apologized lol.

And get this, while we were talking to my dad about it, my older sister (again, a female herself, AND not even my younger sister; it was my OLDER sister), she said something I will never forget till the day I die:

“Why didn’t you hit her earlier?”

Yeah. So moral of the story, you can abuse and hurt a woman as much as you possibly want, and can do it in the cruelest of ways. But if you’re still a MAN when you do it, she will STILL be attracted to you, ALWAYS. ****’s so ****ed up man...
That sounds crazy man. Just so alarming how women operate.

I can relate to your story but the other way round. I remeber how my father was a complete alpha. Did what he wanted without being apologetic. My mother was always in line. ever spoke out of turn and was 100 percent submissive.

However now that they are older my father has become soft. My mother has got her way nearly 90 percent of the times whenever she throws a tantrum. My father does not check her and if he does, he seemingly becomes apologetic. Tries to make her happy or get good with her even when its her fault. The more hes done that the more I have seen my mother disrespect him. He doesnthave that auhtority anymore. Funny thing is hes a richer man now (financially) then he was before but my mother is more disrepectful now then she was back then.

Me and my siblings have discussed this. My brothers and I have noted these things down and seen how women respond to apologetic behavior.
 

samspade

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Apologize rarely and only if it's truly merited. And if it's merited, say it strongly once and mean it and that's it.

The thing about apologies is they have to be accepted or rejected. A lot of the problems discussed here are because you are dating women who don't know how to accept an apology and move on, or you don't know how to offer them this choice. Some women would rather cling to victimhood than forgive, and some men are too prone to feed into that than to walk away.

If she's not letting go and still making it an issue, you simply say "I see you chose not to accept my apology." Then I would recommend making yourself scarce. She'll either come around or lose you.

I've been with some women who are mature enough to understand this. Generally they were not the spoiled western variety (but not always). This is just another reason why it's so important to screen. In fact, if this comes up it's a good screening method. She should know the difference between being hurt in the moment and clinging to anger or using it to settle scores. Any woman who can't forgive and forget is not worth my time.
 

RangerMIke

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If you made a mistake, and sincerely regret your actions, apologize ONCE. If the chick will not let it go, dump her.

Where men go wrong is they become groveling fools... supplicating like a thrall. This sh!t turns women off.

One more thing, if you really are not regretful... do not apologize, do not blame others... just fvcking own it. If you are not sincere, and this is a woman you've been with for awhile, she will know if you really mean your apology.
 

RangerMIke

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That sounds crazy man. Just so alarming how women operate.
Yea... it is crazy. Normally when a chick doesn't respond or flakes on me I just forget about her, pretending she doesn't exist. But a few weeks ago a chick cancelled a date with me the day before, and didn't try to reschedule. Anyway, I've been battling a bout of food poisoning and was not my normal centered self. I happened to run into her a couple of weeks after she flaked on me and asked "Where have you been? I haven't heard from you in weeks." Now normally I would have just told her "Been busy, let's catch up, are you free XYZ..." However, since I was feeling cr@ppy, I said "Well... last time I checked the phone works both ways, you cancelled our date and didn't reschedule... I don't have patience for flaky @ss behavior. Ball's in your court, you want to get together let me know." Then walked away.

She's been texting me like crazy ever since.

Women hate weak behavior, but being an @ss isn't always going to work out for you, she is just as likely to disappear totally and you'll never hear from her again... if that happens at least she'll respect you.
 

Black Widow Void

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However now that they are older my father has become soft. My mother has got her way nearly 90 percent of the times whenever she throws a tantrum. My father does not check her and if he does, he seemingly becomes apologetic.
This is very common after a certain age. Your father is now in his late fifties to late sixties, Right?

In fact, after reading your observation about your father, I thought back to all the dad's I knew when growing up. Most of these men were all southern and old school. Not any more. After a certain age, it seems that even the most hardened man will become mellow.
 

Ceaserofnone

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I made this thread a few days ago. Lo and behold I am now being pressured by my family to apologies to my wife.

Things got out of hand. I understand I was wrong and I overreacted but I can't be apologising. I've made it clear that I should not have done what I did. That it was an overreaction. There are 2 sides to the story. Nonetheless, everyone expects me to apologies.

I wont do it.
 
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