"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Nervous DURING the approach?

ElStud

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So say your in the approach already and you start getting nervous DURING the approach. Like today just a few minutes ago even, I was talking to this Kaara girl and I had no problem starting the chat or even getting interest from her, but dude I was hella nervous. This is uncommon for me, because usually I'm not nervous during the approach or I'm just nervous before the approach. Advice is appreciated.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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ElStud

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Come on guys, I really need advice on this situation.
 

HandyAndy

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I dont think there is really any advice on how not be nervous DURING the interaction, think of her being bald? I heard that works lol
 

Obsidian

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If it's happening, I can think of a few possible explanations:

1) You were tired.
2) She was not doing a good job of making you comfortable; for example, she may have been very untalkative, which put the entire strain of making conversation on you.
3) You had oneitis for her.
4) You tried too hard beforehand to think up something interesting to say.


If you're doing a good job of living in the moment, not thinking ahead for clever thinks to say, not trying to impress her, and not yearning desperately for some smooth way to #-close, then she probably just wasn't doing a good job of making you comfortable. Some girls just make guys nervous, and it's usually because they have poor conversation skills. The upside is that every other guy will have the same problem with her, so if you really want her for whatever reason, you will not be at a disadvantage.
 

MikeYikes122

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^^^ Obsidian makes a lot of good points. I've always noticed if I'm tired as hell I suck at cold approaching. I also need to be in a good mood/have a clear head.

Are you nervous when you're talking to the chick? If so, don't force anything. If the she isn't being talkative with you, just politely move along. It's not a big deal.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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