"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Neediness
- Thread starter Shashank
- Start date
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
Black Widow Void
Master Don Juan
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Under these circumstances, the best advice I can offer ... is for her to perceive you as being detached. This means no texting or "showing up" anywhere that you think she may appear. She can't miss you or wonder about you.. if you are always there to remind her of your availability.
Again, I don't see this one as having a favorable outcome. If you want to give it a shot, again... you need to give off the impression that you are indifferent and detached. If you two share social media, don't over do it, but a photo of you with another gal (and having fun) will not hurt.
It's now up to her to reach out. Because there was no longevity or depth between you two, I don't see this as very likely... but that's your only hope.
If she does reach out, post here again and we'll help you come up with the next plan.
Good luck.
MillionBillionaire
Master Don Juan
The only thing you can do is move on. Sometime in the future she may get bored or lonely and hit you up and give you another small window of opportunity, but for now all hope is lost.
If you keep reminding her who you are this window may never open again. So go ghost and let her wonder what happened.
Move on to another chick.
oldmanofthesea
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Thanks man I love what u wrote.... She was qualifying by saying many dudes propose to her (say I love u n ****) n showed me screenshots...
The condition is she is young n when I kissed her she gave me this closed lip kiss n I thought she didn't want to kiss me but she was smiling the whole time and after that she said people kiss after getting into a relationship but not before..... She said I'm too fast.... Do u think she's inexperienced? .....She has many guy frnds... If she's inexperienced then she might think I'm jus using her for sex n now avoiding me right?
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
Have sexual relations with another for about three months.
Black Widow Void
Master Don Juan
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When someone provides a perspective that we do not like, we can attempt to 'rationalize' an alternative situation/outcome that we may find more desirable. This isn't a put down to you or anything, I've done it myself.
Think back on a situation that you are now completely removed from. You can probably look back with one of those 'palm against the forehead' moments and think to yourself .. "what was I thinking back then?" The problem is... (and I've been there myself; we all have) ... is that when we are emotionally invested, we also become emotionally clouded against the facts. It's normal.
Even though I'm older, I'm still not immune to the "haze." It's just part of life. The only benefit to getting older is that we can recognize our distortive views and realize that we aren't being objective or self-objective. That is when we ask for opinions from someone that isn't within the 'equation' to offer their perspective
With the above being expressed, I still stand by my original response to your posting.
Damnn.... Eye opening... I like ur reply.... Maybe I'm jus making up scenarios to avoid accepting the fact that she lost interest n moved on found someone new.... Thanks for putting things in perspective man...
oldmanofthesea
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My response would have been to laugh and say, "Awww, it's so cute you are trying to impress me!"
My response would have been to laugh and say, "I guess you must like me so much that you're willing to break your own rules!"
She is drowning in options and you are not responding in a way that sets yourself apart from the rest of the guys so she simply enjoyed the attention from you and is now moving past you to continue searching for a guy who is more of a challenge to her, a bigger catch.
GET OTHER GIRLS
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Black Widow Void
Master Don Juan
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We have all had these 'humbling' moments. It's not fun, that's for sure. Even if we discover that a female situation is not salvageable, we can still "win" from a different angle. If we learn from a past experience, we can choose to become a 'newer and improved' version of our self. The more we learn, the more we modify our game and... the better chance for a favorable future outcome.
I've had as many failures here as anyone else. The difference between half of us here... is that some of us learn, improve and get better with girls. The other half, become bitter, blame women and criticize new forum members for their mistakes.
You seem to be on the "right side" of things, my friend.
Good luck with future encounters.