"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
needadvice with that one
- Thread starter Toreador
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
razors_edge
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Man oh man. Toreador, look here and try to understand something. You want to come across as being nice and chivalrous by worrying for her. But do you realize how insanely illogical that is?
First of all, you clearly do not believe that she got herself into trouble and couldn't return your calls and messages. Second, you think she's this special someone. Here's the shyt though. This special someone isn't returning your calls and messages. Okay. Let's say by some freak of nature she was in trouble. She's not gonna go beserk over you for not worrying about her. How the hell are you supposed to when she doesn't even tell you about it?
The fact that you find this silence from her an issue is a clear indication that you should move on from her. You've already done what you can to show your interest. There's no doubt that she is aware of your interests. And now she's ignoring you. Just say "Fvck it".
Hi, You are very symphatic to me and I would like to meet you again, but only as friends, I cant imagine something else.
I wrote her back that I wan`t to call her this evenig to speak with her.
my bottom lines are:
- on the first date there was attraction from her big time
-she revealed that she is intereseted
- I wan't an explanation from her about her change of mind (maybe to learn of mistakes)
-maybe we should start again, but slower
any suggestions?
PS: I realize now, that I messed up with her because of my previous short messages, this was the reason.
this sux.
one last question and please answer:
Where my messages really this bad? cos different girls said that they would have appreciated these 2 messages from a guy.
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
It's not because of your messages man. If it were because of them, I'm telling you know that a girl that could decide whether a guy is worthy of her by 'reading' the messages he sends her is a total waste of time.
This is something you must learn man. That you should be able to do whatever crap shyt you feel like doing and girls still want you. Of course there are situations where you're doing your crap shyt which girls generally get repulsed by. But those are things that are serious. Such as hobbies, interests, personality, behaviour.
So the question you should be asking yourself is, "what is wrong with my behaviour or personality?". And the answer is that you are diving too deep into shyt. No one is going to understand why the hell you choose to do it. Some might feel pity, others might be disgusted or repulsed.
It's going to be tough to get an explanation from her. It's really not worth the time and effort trying to pry that truth from her. If you want to start over with her, she has to initiate it. If she chooses to initiate it, she will choose to do so because you are worth it.
So Toreador, are you really worth it? Are you really all that great that she should give you another opportunity to sample her intimacy?
I'm usually not so hard on people, but what you are doing is something I fully understand and I know it is extremely destructive. I did it once and I never got the girl back. I chose not to do it with my future girls and I never got the girl either. Which means what you're doing now is not going to have an ounce of influence over the outcome of her decisions.
Maybe when you've tried all this with many girls and you've personally experienced how it doesn't lead to where you would like it to go, then you will understand. I'm just trying to give you a heads up on it all.
Yes you screwed up. You fall head over hells for her too quickly and by doing so you place her on the pedestal and became too needy by messaging her too much too soon. Girls don't like guys who come off that way you must not repeat this mistake again. Never place the girl first. Make sure she knows you have a life and you can have fun without her. Consider this experience a lesson learned and move on. Delete her #. If you fail to take advice, you should not ask for them.