"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
needadvice with that one
- Thread starter Toreador
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
razors_edge
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- Oct 27, 2005
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Man oh man. Toreador, look here and try to understand something. You want to come across as being nice and chivalrous by worrying for her. But do you realize how insanely illogical that is?
First of all, you clearly do not believe that she got herself into trouble and couldn't return your calls and messages. Second, you think she's this special someone. Here's the shyt though. This special someone isn't returning your calls and messages. Okay. Let's say by some freak of nature she was in trouble. She's not gonna go beserk over you for not worrying about her. How the hell are you supposed to when she doesn't even tell you about it?
The fact that you find this silence from her an issue is a clear indication that you should move on from her. You've already done what you can to show your interest. There's no doubt that she is aware of your interests. And now she's ignoring you. Just say "Fvck it".
Hi, You are very symphatic to me and I would like to meet you again, but only as friends, I cant imagine something else.
I wrote her back that I wan`t to call her this evenig to speak with her.
my bottom lines are:
- on the first date there was attraction from her big time
-she revealed that she is intereseted
- I wan't an explanation from her about her change of mind (maybe to learn of mistakes)
-maybe we should start again, but slower
any suggestions?
PS: I realize now, that I messed up with her because of my previous short messages, this was the reason.
this sux.
one last question and please answer:
Where my messages really this bad? cos different girls said that they would have appreciated these 2 messages from a guy.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
It's not because of your messages man. If it were because of them, I'm telling you know that a girl that could decide whether a guy is worthy of her by 'reading' the messages he sends her is a total waste of time.
This is something you must learn man. That you should be able to do whatever crap shyt you feel like doing and girls still want you. Of course there are situations where you're doing your crap shyt which girls generally get repulsed by. But those are things that are serious. Such as hobbies, interests, personality, behaviour.
So the question you should be asking yourself is, "what is wrong with my behaviour or personality?". And the answer is that you are diving too deep into shyt. No one is going to understand why the hell you choose to do it. Some might feel pity, others might be disgusted or repulsed.
It's going to be tough to get an explanation from her. It's really not worth the time and effort trying to pry that truth from her. If you want to start over with her, she has to initiate it. If she chooses to initiate it, she will choose to do so because you are worth it.
So Toreador, are you really worth it? Are you really all that great that she should give you another opportunity to sample her intimacy?
I'm usually not so hard on people, but what you are doing is something I fully understand and I know it is extremely destructive. I did it once and I never got the girl back. I chose not to do it with my future girls and I never got the girl either. Which means what you're doing now is not going to have an ounce of influence over the outcome of her decisions.
Maybe when you've tried all this with many girls and you've personally experienced how it doesn't lead to where you would like it to go, then you will understand. I'm just trying to give you a heads up on it all.
Yes you screwed up. You fall head over hells for her too quickly and by doing so you place her on the pedestal and became too needy by messaging her too much too soon. Girls don't like guys who come off that way you must not repeat this mistake again. Never place the girl first. Make sure she knows you have a life and you can have fun without her. Consider this experience a lesson learned and move on. Delete her #. If you fail to take advice, you should not ask for them.