"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Need Urgent Help!

ink_wizard

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Hey fellas,

I am in a really bad situation at the moment. I am in a long distance relationship with a girl from another country. We have been dating for nearly 3 months now and are both totally in love with each other and are planning to visit each other before the years end. I am crazy about this girl despite her living on the other side of the world, we skype heaps and message each other constantly all day everyday.

Heres the problem, two weeks ago i cheated on her with another girl whose suppose to be my "friend". We were at a party together and she was flirting with me and next thing has it we started making out......i feel extremely guilty and ashamed for letting it get to that. She has promised not to tell my gf but she has stopped contacting me since our date which is weird because usually she always contacts me and is now all of a sudden friends with my gf on facebook which has weirded me out...i dont know what to make of this and i hope she doesnt open up her mouth....

i cant bring myself to tell my gf because the kiss meant nothing to me and if she ever found out it would totally break her heart....this is why i cant tell her but should i??? do you think i should be worried here or should i just shut up and suck it up and hope she never finds out? PLEASE HELP! im going crazy here.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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PeakIV

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With all due respect these long distance relationship things are tough to stick to at the best of times.

Not wanting to be disspespectful but how do you know she is not going through the same dllema?
 

ink_wizard

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PeakIV said:
With all due respect these long distance relationship things are tough to stick to at the best of times.

Not wanting to be disspespectful but how do you know she is not going through the same dllema?
because i dont think she is the type to do that to me. she is crazily inlove with me and all her friends know it (i speak to them) and she even wants to marry me....anything is possible i guess but i highly doubt she'd cheat on me....
 

ink_wizard

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PairPlusRoyalFlush said:
Why would you tell her? Did she ask?
because im scared the girl i made out with might spill the beans to her..... an no she hasnt asked.
 

PeakIV

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play it by ear that's all you can do...My motto is - if in doubt deny everything...
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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ink_wizard

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yes i agree, although before i made out with this girl i did send her some flirty text messages and yes i know that was foolish of me i was lonely and my sex drive got the better of me but hopefully she hasnt saved these and if she has im screwed cos she'll use this as evidence.....
 

Atom Smasher

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Ink Wizard, how old are you? You should put it in your profile.

Like Peak says you need to play this one by ear. Your anxiety is the price you pay for betraying trust. All you can do is let it rest and see what happens.

Long distance relationships are rarely worth it. The anxiety level is always high, and you end up having the most severe oneitis for someone who isn't even around. Very bad formula for a man's well-being.
 

ink_wizard

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Atom Smasher said:
Ink Wizard, how old are you? You should put it in your profile.

Like Peak says you need to play this one by ear. Your anxiety is the price you pay for betraying trust. All you can do is let it rest and see what happens.

Long distance relationships are rarely worth it. The anxiety level is always high, and you end up having the most severe oneitis for someone who isn't even around. Very bad formula for a man's well-being.
im 24 and shes 21. and yes i am playing it by ear but i dont want to lose this girl, i like her alot. im considering just denying the whole thing :confused:
 
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