Heres the situation: Ive been with my GF for over a year now. We live together currently, shes in grad school studying plant molecular biology and Im working for Wells Fargo. I have a bachelors and shes getting her masters. Now here is where I dont know what to do. She might be done this December with school and will be getting a job soon. Her job will most likely be higher pay than what I am currently doing. But I am looking to become a financial advisor which probably pulls in more money. But im not counting on it. In my line of work I could get a job anywhere in the US most likely with her its a lot more specific in where she could probably work. My thinking is that she will probably put her job first due to the fact of the masters degree and pay she has and will get. Im willing to move with her cause I think I could get a job wherever she lands. Does this seem fine? I also dont know if I should bring it up or if she should. let me know thanks
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Need some sound advice with someone with experience
- Thread starter MKS82
- Start date
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Dash Riprock
Master Don Juan
"My thinking is that she will probably put her job first due to the fact of the masters degree and pay she has and will get. "
If this is a LTGF with even more LT potential, talk about your goals. Ask her what her LT career goals are and how they fit in with how she sees your relationship playing out. Just listen! Peel the onion then and ask her "how", "why", etc. Just act curious. Ask open-ended questions. Get as much info as possible to save yourself a HUGE headache down the road. I work with people ALL THE TIME who get serious and don't do this, then they end up a$$ r4ped in court.
Make sure you're both on the same page so there isn't a rude awakening 3 yrs from now when you're married with a kid and she pulls the "career move" issue on you.
Define your "deal breakers." Is moving one of them? It would be for me. People can still surprise you a lot after 1 yr. in a relationship.
If this is a LTGF with even more LT potential, talk about your goals. Ask her what her LT career goals are and how they fit in with how she sees your relationship playing out. Just listen! Peel the onion then and ask her "how", "why", etc. Just act curious. Ask open-ended questions. Get as much info as possible to save yourself a HUGE headache down the road. I work with people ALL THE TIME who get serious and don't do this, then they end up a$$ r4ped in court.
Make sure you're both on the same page so there isn't a rude awakening 3 yrs from now when you're married with a kid and she pulls the "career move" issue on you.
Define your "deal breakers." Is moving one of them? It would be for me. People can still surprise you a lot after 1 yr. in a relationship.
NewMan
Master Don Juan
Are you going to stay at home and look after the kids?
Thought not. Concentrate on your career.
Thought not. Concentrate on your career.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.