Justaguy254254
Don Juan
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iqqi said:
I will do so.
Might make for an interesting story someday... heh
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Need some help pretty quickly regarding my LTR...
- Thread starter Justaguy254254
- Start date
I will do so.
Might make for an interesting story someday... heh"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Justaguy254254
Don Juan
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mintxx said:
Good point. It is funny how things like that happen... How there sometimes seem to be very subtle "strings" that sometimes attach us...but only when we least expect it.
Justaguy254254
Don Juan
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Just a little update, I thought this would be interesting to share.
I called and left a message on the phone. I felt I had additional things to say. Now don't get all worried guys, I did this for my own reasons again. I didn't get all mushy or beg for her back or supplicate in any way. I spoke very calmly, and I was utterly confident in my tone of voice and felt completely at ease.
I said that I was still happy with my decision to break up with her, again putting the control of things in my court. All of this was my decision, of course, and I let her know it again. I also wanted to say a few other things. I said:
1) I learned a lot from my time with her, and she learned a lot from me. Overall everything was a net positive in my life and hers.
2) We were able to talk about it reasonably and there was no shouting or screaming match.
3) I said life is full of possibilities, and I was very excited about the future and I would be out making my own destiny.
4) Like before I wish you the best of luck but I am not going to contact you again because it's not a good idea. If you want to talk again someday in the future that is your decision.
And so it goes, I hung up. A few minutes later her mom ends up texting me...she heard the message...and said she was glad I called since she and my former gf were talking about me last night. She expressed the hope that we'd keep in contact. Obviously, she's old enough to know that I'm awesome and better than the vast majority of guys. She's always liked me from the beginning. Anyway, I didn't bother replying to the texts.
Soon after that, my ex gf calls and leaves a message. Tells me she really liked what I had to say and I can call back if i want... and she hoped to hear from me soon. Obviously, I didn't call back.
So that is where things are. I think I've done just about as well as I can do. Seems clear that she is still thinking about me, but I'm not gonna wait around. Time to see other chicks.
I called and left a message on the phone. I felt I had additional things to say. Now don't get all worried guys, I did this for my own reasons again. I didn't get all mushy or beg for her back or supplicate in any way. I spoke very calmly, and I was utterly confident in my tone of voice and felt completely at ease.
I said that I was still happy with my decision to break up with her, again putting the control of things in my court. All of this was my decision, of course, and I let her know it again. I also wanted to say a few other things. I said:
1) I learned a lot from my time with her, and she learned a lot from me. Overall everything was a net positive in my life and hers.
2) We were able to talk about it reasonably and there was no shouting or screaming match.
3) I said life is full of possibilities, and I was very excited about the future and I would be out making my own destiny.
4) Like before I wish you the best of luck but I am not going to contact you again because it's not a good idea. If you want to talk again someday in the future that is your decision.
And so it goes, I hung up. A few minutes later her mom ends up texting me...she heard the message...and said she was glad I called since she and my former gf were talking about me last night. She expressed the hope that we'd keep in contact. Obviously, she's old enough to know that I'm awesome and better than the vast majority of guys. She's always liked me from the beginning. Anyway, I didn't bother replying to the texts.
Soon after that, my ex gf calls and leaves a message. Tells me she really liked what I had to say and I can call back if i want... and she hoped to hear from me soon. Obviously, I didn't call back.
So that is where things are. I think I've done just about as well as I can do. Seems clear that she is still thinking about me, but I'm not gonna wait around. Time to see other chicks.
iqqi
Master Don Juan
You are never supposed to do that.
Are you going to do it again a week from now, if you don't hear from her?
Are you going to do it again a week from now, if you don't hear from her?
Justaguy254254
Don Juan
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I did what I wanted to do, it was something I did for myself. No worries.iqqi said:
I am not going to contact her again.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
MacAvoy
Banned
Wow, I'm actually impressed with something iqqi said.iqqi said:
But to the OP, you've got your closure man, now you can truly move on. I agree w/ iqqi that you shouldn't have done it, but I understand why you did it. Granted it was AFC, but you got off relatively scott free, you got respect from her circle and she returned the msg politely. END OF STORY.
Let the next chapter in your life begin. Move on now.