"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Need some good advice, I think i ruined it.

gimmeyofonenumba

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She is a co-worker, but like i said in another topic i think its cool cause she works on a whole different floor and im leaving in 2 weeks. My intent was to take this kinda thing slow and ask for a phone # or a date after real good rapport was est.

Anyways I walked in and on the way up the stairs she happened to be there, she lit up when she saw me, I made a funny statement made her laugh and got to work.

I was there all day and was very tired as i was leaving she was still there, but i just wasnt in the mood to really talk, but i felt i had to say something, so i said hey blah blah "you look tired". It like set her off, She replied with something like "you shouldnt say that to a girl you'll make them feel ugly" but said it in a tone like she was about to burst into tears. I was real pissed to even hear this since i didnt feel like talking in the 1st place. I said something like "well i feel tired" and i just walked away.

-honestly, i cant imagine myself talking to her again without her being pissed or something, what yall think? Should i say anything in particular if i ever see her again?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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AmIAFC

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I hear ya.

The co-worker I smashed did something that pissed me off and I made a very nasty remark before I left her alone. I called her back up the next day to apologize for my actions -- apologizing for something you know was wrong doesn't make you a chump -- and she lit up. She wants to go to the movies and have a drink.

Whether I LJBF'd myself or whatever is irrelevant, because I sexed that and plus I think she's a cool/genuine person who I like to be around.

I don't think you said or did anything wrong. Give it time, and maybe she'll come around and realize how silly she was being.
 

gimmeyofonenumba

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Alright, So you think i should apologize? i feel like i did something wrong, but dont really have anything to apologize for i mean seriously, I barely even know her, its unsual for emotions to be this high early on. I dont wanna wait for her to come around, and the way she seems to be, I dont think she ever will.
 

AmIAFC

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Originally posted by gimmeyofonenumba
Alright, So you think i should apologize? i feel like i did something wrong, but dont really have anything to apologize for i mean seriously, I barely even know her, its unsual for emotions to be this high early on. I dont wanna wait for her to come around, and the way she seems to be, I dont think she ever will.
No, assess the situation carefully. I really think she was being ridiculous, because you didn't say anything negative about her, nor was it your intention to do so. I think she knows that.
 

flexion_

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Get her phone number and start this over when you aren't working there anymore. Call her up and ask her out in 2 weeks.

The whole "work" atmosphere is affecting things. Its not hard to wait two weeks.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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