Need some advice..

[SoSuaveDude]

Okay, so this girl goes to my church, and we were quite intimate last year, but in the past few months, her interest level has died down, and i can tell she's tried other guys. However, last week she spontaneously approached me and says that she bout me valentines day gifts and wants me to come over sometime during the week. She claimed she would cook for me etc. At this point im thinking she has a personality disorder lol, but i tread with low expectations anyway.

We schedule a day, and i text her the day of the "date" and she's responsive and whatnot. However, as time passes, she does not call me and tell me that she's out of school so i can get her like she mutually agreed to, so i give her a ring twice and there's no response. She apparently flaked on me. Sunday comes and I see her at church. She rushes to talk to me and tell me that she was kicked out of her dorm due to a financial hold. "I say oh really, well why didn't you call me and tell me what was up. I literally made arrangements for us?" I said you practically stood me, and she said "i guess."

Then she says sorry and that we can still hang out with her if I want to. The way she words this makes it seem like i'm a "burden" to her and her schedule. Like she has no interest in getting together and it's an inconvenience. It was hard, but I refuse and say we don't have to, and she goes on her way. After service she tries to hover around me, but i remain nonchalant about her presence.

Did i do the right thing, or do you guys think i should have given her another try? Might be me, but i refuse to become a lenient pushover who she fails to respect. Can't make her feel like she owns me. She seems like a confirmed attention wh0re based on our past intimacy imo.

And also, how can i fully move on considering that i'll see her in church? Is there anyway I can make her feel like she missed out on something great? I ask this, because I currently feel like she "won," but I want the last laugh lol. thanks brahs.

 

[Johnnyventana]

You're obviously going to need to stop going to church!

I like how you rebuffed her. Wait for it... You'll be rewarded.

 

[SoSuaveDude]

bump!

 

[SoSuaveDude]

Last bump, I would seriously appreciate any other opinions.

 

[Johnnyventana]

The thing about AWs is that if you display that you like them, they go cold. And when they think they are losing their grip on you, they go hot or clingy, as you wrote of above. All of a sudden they are all about you. Repeat.

It is a pendulum. It swings from one extreme to the other. It never settles in the middle. You are trying to find a way to make it settle in the middle. It ain't gonna happen.

Some chicks are just throw-aways. No matter how hot. All of us need to accept that. If you're only interested in hitting it. Then your on the right path. You shot her down and she was all about you. She is not however, relationship material.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

I would have told her that it was no problem that she flaked. You had better things to do regardless. "When your trying to hang out with me just hit my phone up and come to the crib if I'm not busy.'

Then delete her number and act aloof. If she doesn't really want to hang out with you then your good to go. If she does though then your good to go too.

 

[SoSuaveDude]

The thing about AWs is that if you display that you like them, they go cold. And when they think they are losing their grip on you, they go hot or clingy, as you wrote of above. All of a sudden they are all about you. Repeat.

It is a pendulum. It swings from one extreme to the other. It never settles in the middle. You are trying to find a way to make it settle in the middle. It ain't gonna happen.

Some chicks are just throw-aways. No matter how hot. All of us need to accept that. If you're only interested in hitting it. Then your on the right path. You shot her down and she was all about you. She is not however, relationship material.

Yeah, she's clearly an AW. I really do want to hit it, but i'm just going to keep a rather non-interested frame and see where it goes!

 

[SoSuaveDude]

Oh lawd! she texted me today and acted flirty and whatnot. I responded and stayed casual with her though. Any tips to get a quick lay from her and then boot? She said i could potentially be her "love" someday. LOL what an AW...