"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Need some advice fast (newbie)

KillingTime

Senior Don Juan
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Hey sup guys, im totally new to this DJ stuff so just keep that in mind. Alright long story short: Ive been talking to this girl for quite some time, about 2 years i think, started out as just friends but in the past couple of months there has been LOTS of constant flirting (btw this girl is my very first attempt at NOT being a nice guy) about a week ago she told me she had feelings for me and stuff, that was cool to hear... now yesterday she told me she was having second thoughts, she says she has trouble getting close to people (prolly true, she's only had one bf and she's 17, never kissed a guy or anything) and it looks like she's just having alot of trouble dealing with a relationship. So now I got the dreaded "i love you as a friend" line (how this happened, i don't know.. i wasn't nice!) she told me how every now and then she gets these really strong feelings for me and just acts on them (the constant flirting) but she seems so confused and it's like she's trying so hard to push the feelings away, and trying to drag me into the friend zone... well I don't ever want to get dragged into it ever again, happened too many times before. What's done is done, but what should I do now? She's like "i love you so much" and stuff, In the past I would have probably been begging her to go out with me or something, no way im ever doing that bs again. Ive been thinking maybe I should start hanging out with her best friend and see if that gets her jealous and acts as a wake-up call or something. Any ideas or advice? Thanks in advance
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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VIVAlasVEGASBaby

Senior Don Juan
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Don't **** with her by playing the jealous card. That is the most insecure AFC thing you could do. It'll ruin your relationship with her, with her friend, and the girl's relationship with her friend (all in the big picture). It's pretty obvious you like this girl, but you need to realize that she's pretty flakey (at least from the description you gave us).

The best advice i could give you is this; Act the same as you always have around her, but shift your focus elsewhere. Find a new chick and make a new friend; hell, try and make 5 new friends. Spend less time with her, only without the intentions of making her jealous. Basically move on and meet new people, if she really does like you, she'll come around.

That's probably not the advice you wanted to hear, but if you want to take a step closer to being a DJ, then do the impossible and NEXT her.
 

KillingTime

Senior Don Juan
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Thanks for the tip man, thats cool and i'm totally open to anything, im definately going to start hangin out with a couple of other girls and see how she reacts to that. I just mentioned her best friend b/c we talk a lot online and are pretty good friends, figured I could start hanging out with her a bit just as a friend (since we are) but i'm still learning this stuff so i'll take your word on that one. Yea i guess it's obvious, i really like this girl but I really want to prove to her that i'm NOT some nice guy that she can **** around with.... she seems so incredibly innocent and I really doubt she has much game but i'm not going to take the chance and just give in to her crap.
 

VIVAlasVEGASBaby

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I completely know the feeling. You can trust me on that one. Sometimes "proving" your manliness is a bit of a joke. I know you want to show her what a great guy you are and how much you have to offer, but sometimes people just can't see it. Sometimes the greatest thing you can do is just walk away, not to prove your manhood to her, but to prove it to yourself.

There's something better around every corner anyways :D
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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