"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Need advice- plate asking reno' help

The Diver

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Backround:
Two years ago I spend few month with this girl. She looked for LTR ,so we split up.
We hooked up again few month ago and we are spending together one night every fortnight, which mostly at her place.

Now here is the thing:
She renovating her place , and b'cos some of my work involving renovations , she asked my help with few things. She was happy to pay me , but I didn't feel comfortable taking money from her, so I told her she can invite me for a nice restaurant instead.

I have my own rule that I'm not mixing business with pleasure, and I intended helping her as one off, but just now she asked me again if I can help her with few more small jobs in her place.

I don't want to fall into this pattern with any woman I'm involving with, and I really don't want to "help" her again, (which in this case she will take a tradesperson )

How you suggest I should respond her request for "help" again?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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The Diver

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Well, it"s looks like no one have been in the same situation like that .

I sticked to my rule and told her I'll be happy to help her out but I prefer not mixing business with pleasure ,and therefore will charge her from now on . She was positively about it and said she'll be happy to pay me for my works.

It's actually feel good sticking to my principal, keeping clear bundrey, and not getting "soft" with her, finding myself doing "small chores" around her place,,,
 

Dingo

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Your testicles don't shrink when you help girlfriends/women. Just don't slip into White Knight territory...

Help her with the small jobs. Doing projects together is a fun good way to know each other.
 

MrWood

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just tell her she can make dinner for you helping, but if she gets out of line you will slap her ass and no promises of kiss/sex wont happen
 

Trump

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How you suggest I should respond her request for "help" again?
"Lets not mix business with pleasure. If something isn't fixed the way you like it could ruin us and I greatly value our relationship"

You have to phrase it so she thinks you are on HER side and she jumps at the opportunity to call someone else because she thinks its to her benefit.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Spaz

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I see nothing wrong in helping women or men for that matter.

As long as I can afford to do it and within my area of expertise or business then I'll do it. Not a big deal. I can afford to be magnanimous from time to time.
 
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