"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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need advice nowwww

fuko2007

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just texted the girl ive been seeing for a while we just got back togther and asked if she wanted to do some thing later. She said she was going to try and go to dinner with this guy friend since she had been putting it off for a while but said we could later if i wanted to. I know her and this guy have slept togther before.

What should i say back? was thinking of something along the lines of Ok ...sounds like your busy ill do something else and catch up with u later. but what else can i say>
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Uncharted

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What do you mean you are "back together"? If she's going to dinner with some guy then you aren't together. At least to me you're not.

If you're just casually dating her, I would call her up and just say hey let's go out (the same day she said she might have plans). If she says "well I dunno maybe after" then just say something like

"well if you're too busy, then maybe we shouldn't"

Wait for her reaction. If she recommends another day then you're good. If she is vague, she is messing with you.

By the way, if when you said "back together" you are bf/gf you need to talk to her about seeing other men. Because I wouldn't put up with that.
 

fuko2007

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Uncharted said:
What do you mean you are "back together"? If she's going to dinner with some guy then you aren't together. At least to me you're not.

If you're just casually dating her, I would call her up and just say hey let's go out (the same day she said she might have plans). If she says "well I dunno maybe after" then just say something like

"well if you're too busy, then maybe we shouldn't"

Wait for her reaction. If she recommends another day then you're good. If she is vague, she is messing with you.

By the way, if when you said "back together" you are bf/gf you need to talk to her about seeing other men. Because I wouldn't put up with that.
yeh your right. we have been like this for a year and a half. its complicated. she can go have dinner with guy friends bc of personal matters in their lives and they want to talk etc but if i go out im the bad guy. I mean its treated like a relationship towards me but if i treat it like one towards her she wigs out
 

SamTheHobit

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The only thing you can do here is to tell her to go fvck herself.
 

Uncharted

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It sounds like you are really caught up on this one chick (one-itis). Maybe let her go for a while and date other girls? If you are always hounding after her for a relationship then you might come across as needy.

Best-case scenario you meet a hotter/nicer chick and start dating her. Then you'll forget all about this one. It's happened to me about 6 times before - trust me finding new pu55y is the best medicine.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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JohnChops

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No more keyboard jockeying . Action is the place.
SamTheHobit said:
The only thing you can do here is to tell her to go fvck herself.
As much I usually disagree with Sam on everything, I agree with him on this. I was in your shoes once. Why keep being on and off with a girl for YEARS when you're getting nothing out of it besides being led on. Drop her. Of course you don't need to tell her anything just be a ghost.
 

pdx1138

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Thats good advice, you should go ghost.

I had a so called relationship like this once and it sucked.

go ghost.
 

self-respect

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fuko2007 said:
yeh your right. we have been like this for a year and a half. its complicated. she can go have dinner with guy friends bc of personal matters in their lives and they want to talk etc but if i go out im the bad guy. I mean its treated like a relationship towards me but if i treat it like one towards her she wigs out
Quasi-relationship. She's using you. Not interested. Been through it. Get out of "complicated" stuff. Life should be simple.
 

fuko2007

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thanks guys lots of good advice and it seems that everyone is saying the same thing. Ive gone ghost on her before and didnt talk to her for 2 or three months but thats when she started to treat it like a relationship but say we are not in one. Anyway i think ill take yalls advice and just spin plates for the time being. im only 24 so why get hung up in a semi LTR that sucks right? As far as ghosting again i think ill just distance myself slowly etc. but ill keep updateing things.
 

buzzin_frog

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fuko2007 said:
just texted the girl ive been seeing for a while we just got back togther
Looks like she is "getting together" with another guy instead


fuko2007 said:
and asked if she wanted to do some thing later. She said she was going to try and go to dinner with this guy friend since she had been putting it off for a while
So she chooses another guy over you. Sounds like a great start to "getting back together"

fuko2007 said:
but said we could later if i wanted to. I know her and this guy have slept togther before.
If you wanted to? Shouldn't she want to do something with you since you are "back together"? What do you think they are going to do after dinner? This proves right there that she has no interest in you.

fuko2007 said:
What should i say back? was thinking of something along the lines of Ok ...sounds like your busy ill do something else and catch up with u later. but what else can i say>
You should go out with another girl. Then you should tell her to fvck off. That is what you should tell her. Can you handle that? She will be busy fvcking him, not you. Why would you let a girl do that to you if you are "together"? Makes no sense at all. You let her treat you like a b!tch while you just take it. Don't let a woman treat you this way!! Ever!!

This is why women treat men the way they do because these "men" allow themselves to be treated like a b!tch and they just take it.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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