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Need A Man's Advice. Is he still into his ex or being paranoid?

tiziki

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This is my first time on this site but I really needed a guy's opinion.

Sorry for the wall of text in advance!

I was set up with my friends SO’s friend. We met about towards late October. The issue is, upon finding out, my friend told me he likes about every other picture his ex has posted. My friend told me that they broke up in early October. I do know she broke up with him and tried to reconcile a week later, he said no. That he was happy and had moved on within that week they were broken up. That same night and following day he sent her about 6 or 7 messages. He was saying how her breaking up with him really messed with his head and how he wanted to stay but felt like he couldn't. Then later told her he was struggling with the breakup and she said she was too. Also, they had also discussed marriage and kids.

It wasn’t until recently that my friend’s SO really spilled the beans about their breakup- none of which my friend knew prior to setting me up. My friend is under the impression that he tried to make her jealous (I don’t agree). He snapped a video of his food and then showed the girl he was on a date then posted it on social media. He did this was a few weeks after telling her that he was struggling. I don't believe showing off your date on social media means you're trying to make someone jealous though. If anything I think he was just trying to signal to his for her to move on.

Anywho, she sent him a message saying she was hurt but loved him enough to be happy for him to be moving on. He replied with a “?”, and she said I’m referring to your new date. He told her how he loved her very much but they just had a lot of issues. Then sent her another message saying it’s not wise to give out information about what may or may not be going on his dating life. She said she wasn’t asking but wished him all the best. He then liked her picture a few days later and I was told he was looking at her social media. This happened in November. He liked a picture she posted a few weeks ago. My friend also told me now in December he will do things like ignore her Snapchat but will look at her friend’s Snapchat.

Recently his mother was put into hospice. I was with him and he had his messages up and I saw he told her, “thanks for the card”. So apparently she sent him some sympathy card or something.

  1. If he was still interested in her he would’ve said more than thanks for the card right?

  2. Also, if he was interested he wouldn’t do things like ignore her Snapchat and look at her friend’s Snapchat, he would just look at it pretty frequently like he did last month right?
 
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AJ84

Guest
This is my first time on this site but I really needed a guy's opinion.

Sorry for the wall of text in advance!

I was set up with my friends SO’s friend. We met about towards late October. The issue is, upon finding out, my friend told me he likes about every other picture his ex has posted. My friend told me that they broke up in early October. I do know she broke up with him and tried to reconcile a week later, he said no. That he was happy and had moved on within that week they were broken up. That same night and following day he sent her about 6 or 7 messages. He was saying how her breaking up with him really messed with his head and how he wanted to stay but felt like he couldn't. Then later told her he was struggling with the breakup and she said she was too. Also, they had also discussed marriage and kids.

It wasn’t until recently that my friend’s SO really spilled the beans about their breakup- none of which my friend knew prior to setting me up. My friend is under the impression that he tried to make her jealous (I don’t agree). He snapped a video of his food and then showed the girl he was on a date then posted it on social media. He did this was a few weeks after telling her that he was struggling. I don't believe showing off your date on social media means you're trying to make someone jealous though. If anything I think he was just trying to signal to his for her to move on.

Anywho, she sent him a message saying she was hurt but loved him enough to be happy for him to be moving on. He replied with a “?”, and she said I’m referring to your new date. He told her how he loved her very much but they just had a lot of issues. Then sent her another message saying it’s not wise to give out information about what may or may not be going on his dating life. She said she wasn’t asking but wished him all the best. He then liked her picture a few days later and I was told he was looking at her social media. This happened in November. He liked a picture she posted a few weeks ago. My friend also told me now in December he will do things like ignore her Snapchat but will look at her friend’s Snapchat.

Recently his mother was put into hospice. I was with him and he had his messages up and I saw he told her, “thanks for the card”. So apparently she sent him some sympathy card or something.

  1. If he was still interested in her he would’ve said more than thanks for the card right?

  2. Also, if he was interested he wouldn’t do things like ignore her Snapchat and look at her friend’s Snapchat, he would just look at it pretty frequently like he did last month right?
Not a guy but I don’t think it will matter. He’s not over her. Look at it from face value, rather than trying to filter the obvious into something that you want to believe. Move on to a guy who isn’t hung up on another girl.
 

tiziki

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Not a guy but I don’t think it will matter. He’s not over her. Look at it from face value, rather than trying to filter the obvious into something that you want to believe. Move on to a guy who isn’t hung up on another girl.
How is he still hung up?

Wouldn't he have said more than thanks to the card? Also, why is he now avoiding her social media? Aren't those signs he's moving on?
 
A

AJ84

Guest
How is he still hung up?

Wouldn't he have said more than thanks to the card? Also, why is he now avoiding her social media? Aren't those signs he's moving on?
I thought about that too but he is creeping on his ex’s friends social media, which, to me, just seems like an indirect way of creeping on the ex’a social media.
You’re posting here wondering about his behaviour so you already have a gut feeling that something is off. You probably like the guy so of course want to believe that it isn’t what you feel it is.
It’s usually just best to go with that feeling but let’s see what the guys advise because there are some here who can give great insight from a guy’s perspective.
 

lizardking82

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You're possibly the rebound. Doesn't seem like a good situation to be involved in right now.
 

Desdinova

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How is he still hung up?

Wouldn't he have said more than thanks to the card?
You can nit pick his actions and over-analyze anything you want, but he'd rather be fvcking his ex instead of you.

You can continue competing if you want. Women like doing that. Just don't expect him to keep you around if him and his ex want to "patch things up".
 

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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You can nit pick his actions and over-analyze anything you want, but he'd rather be fvcking his ex instead of you.

You can continue competing if you want. Women like doing that. Just don't expect him to keep you around if him and his ex want to "patch things up".
OP, the above quote pretty much sums it up. If his ex comes back begging hard, he WILL take her back. It sucks but ya the truth. Most people suck with emotions, especially heartbreak and love. Do what you think is best. If you decide to leave, I’d say to make sure that it doesn’t ruin your friendship with anyone else. I don’t think it will, but just something to keep in mind.
 

sazc

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Oh holy hell....

The situation is causing you angst and drama WHY continue it?!

Your supposed to want to be with someone that you are happy with, sometime who makes you feel good being involved with. Cut him loose.
 

Chev.Chelios

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yup, I've been in that same spot.

if your really interested in going deep with what's really going in his read Robert glover, and the rational male beta male posts. explains what he's doing more better then I can.

he's a angry beta male with a screwed up head, his ex pissed him off somehow and he broke up with her out of ego, he's still into her but he's acting like the aloof player that wants to make her jealous and get back at her, yet he still has deep feelings and wants to reconcile. it's a severe mind fvckery that guys rarely have the ability to get out of.
 

tiziki

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yup, I've been in that same spot.

if your really interested in going deep with what's really going in his read Robert glover, and the rational male beta male posts. explains what he's doing more better then I can.

he's a angry beta male with a screwed up head, his ex pissed him off somehow and he broke up with her out of ego, he's still into her but he's acting like the aloof player that wants to make her jealous and get back at her, yet he still has deep feelings and wants to reconcile. it's a severe mind fvckery that guys rarely have the ability to get out of.

Hmm interesting. He tried to make her jealous a month ago though. He hasn't done anything or said anything except the thank you to the card since a month ago. If he still wanted his ex wouldn't he have said more than thanks or have tried to reconcile with her by now?
 

dude99

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this has to be a troll or some desperate guy. i remember seeing a similar post recently about a guy trying to get back some girl he only knew for a few weeks. all the same questions
I thought i was having deja vu when i read the story as well
 

Chev.Chelios

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from my experience personally, unless your a dude with no emotional baggage going into a relationship it's always set up to fail, sure he can be into you but its for the wrong reasons.

hurt beta males are stuck in a loop of quite desperation with zero masculine presence.

the correct response you should hear from a guy with an ex is "yeah we loved each other very much but it just didn't work out"

not these weird tactics in getting revenge.

you should look into yourself to being attracted by such guys in that mental state, woman with issues will get into such relationships because their into guys that are emotionaly unavailable like their fathers were.
 

Trump

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this has to be a troll or some desperate guy.
This is exactly why I doubt all the top players in here sleep with beautiful hot women.

If they believe and reply to this, any hot women in 2017, heck, any OK looking women, would make their head spin in 17 seconds. But they are all players that know how to say the right things and can sleep with beautiful women with their eyes closed.

:rolleyes:
 
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