Need a kick!

[DonJuanit0]

I've been with this girl for about 1 year and a half, though we made it official 1 month ago! The thing is, She disrespects me! And what I mean is, she doesn't show me the same things I do! I'm not being AFC or anything but for instance, she prefers to meet with her friends instead of me (I'm not being paranoid, if she could spend the whole week with her friends she would propably meet with me for 1 day)! I am always the first to suggest to get together! She doesn't sweet talk to me at all! The thing is, when I go nc she always calls me! She has told me that she's been in a LTR for years now and she wants her freedom but also she wants to be with me! I'm sure she doesn't cheat, I've told her that if she doesn't want this to continue, cause that's what I get from her actions we could simply brake up! She just refused and kept acting this way!

I simply don't know if I have the strength to break up yet, day by day I get even more stronger but I don't know yet! It hurts being with her but I'm afraid of the pain when I tell her to brake up! And I know by experience she will try to get back together with me!

She wants me but doesn't show it... At all...

 

[cola]

1 Be ready to leave her at any time. Your self respect is more important than the relationship. Allowing yourself to be mistreated damages your respect for yourself over time which is unhealthy for a plethera of reasons.

2. Set boundaries. Tell her what will not[B/] be tolerated. By not tolerated I mean non compliance results in a withdrawal of affection/attention and further f^ckery will result in breakup

3. Get a hobby. Find something to keep you occupied so you dont care what she is doing or who she is with.

4. She should know how replaceable she is. Don't rub it in her face but let it be known that you can and will drop her like wet baloney if she doednt shape up.

5. If after steps 1-3 you still are having problems leave her. Not fake temper tantrum leave her I mean really leave her. She will respect you more for not tolerating her bs. Have some fun and in a year or two who knows maybe she will.have grown up. But dont count on it just find the next one and follow one thru three from fhe startw

 

[theMac]

Remember the rule

She could be calling you the prince of her *****, overlord of all orgasms and the big **** champion of the world, but what does she do? Drop you, and go out with her friends.

If your relationship was a silent movie, what impression would you get from it?

Remember Rollo Tomassi's Cardinal Rule of Relationships

"In any relationship, the person with the most power is the one who needs the other the least."

 

[DonJuanit0]

She's disordered

Tell me about it!

Cola thanks for the advices I will follow them although I knew everything... I just can't decide to start! I will...

 

[rum]

this could carry on for another 40 years or another 2 days.

my assessment is that she does care about you...but it's on the cusp of caring and not. You don't seem so crazy about her either

Basically she is setting all the boundaries and this relationship is on her terms only. You've called her bluff by going NC for a few times and she's crawled back.

Her keeping you at arms length is worrying, but you seem only mildly irritated over it, not bawling in a corner

 

[DonJuanit0]

We broke up anyway, yesterday! I told her to.. We argued again about how we treat each other and I told her I've fallen very low to her eyes and a LTR can't hold like this so it's better to break up! She then called me and kinda tried to convince me that she was breaking up with me and not me, I hanged up and she sent me a message I didn't reply, 3 hours later she sent a message again saying how rude I am and staff in which I didn't reply either!

 

[DonJuanabe]

Sounds like, in her heart, she already had broken up with you but didn't have what it takes to say it to your face. Whenever you went NC she didn't like it because it put you in control, thus she got in touch with you but note her ACTIONS didn't change. So when you initiated the expressed breakup she of course was upset because she feels you got the upper hand even though she hadn't been into you anyway, and she does not like that.

Take this to heart: whenever you know the girl is pulling all the strings of the relationship it is time to get out -- it means she at best tolerates you and that will go down hill in no time. A girl who likes you (or loves you) will want you to lead the relationship and she will be happy to spend time with you.