"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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My shink's hamster

backbreaker

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So I had a meeting with my shrink yesterday. I see her once every 2 weeks. We got on the subject of men and women or what not and she was telling me that men think they know what women want but they don't, beucase well my boyfriend has a pot belly and he's so confident. I was like well **** woman you're 50 lol. no offense. i mean,s he's actually not ugly at all, and i have a thing for women who dress up business like and she likes to wear really expensive **** me pumps, but she's still 50 lol. and she looks 50. she's not one of those 50 year olds that looks 35 or ****, she's 50. of course your boyfriend has a pot belly you old **** lol.

now she trying to make it sound like that's what she wanted all along
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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logicallefty

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She knows that women's heads are fvvcked up and knows you know that. So she is trying to tear down your confidence and make you doubt yourself because the more men that know what you know, the less power women have as a whole.
 

dasein

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Hope you aren't paying much. That sounds like a crappy shrink.
 

Cejay

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I briefly dated a shrink.

It was one of the worst relationships ever. She was highly insecure, jealous, clingy, wouldn't respect my alone time, needed constant attention or she freaked out and sent nasty texts, on and on.

CJ.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Bokanovsky

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I'm glad that you are finally getting professional help, which you clearly need. Unfortunately, it seems like you are getting it from the wrong source. A 50-year-old broad that wears "fvck me pumps" and talks about her boyfriend and "what women want"? Are you seriously paying money for that? Just find some bored housewife at the mall and chat her up. She'd talk about that sh!t all day for free.
 

backbreaker

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Yeah but you're mom isn't available so I dont' have a choice lol
 

Alvafe

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backbreaker said:
Yeah but you're mom isn't available so I dont' have a choice lol

oh but i'm sure you're is


serious mom calling? are you so lacking of arguments to have to use this?

only thing I can question here is why post this? venting? that is ok, but why you see this shrink to have this kind of talk? did you try to talk with other?
 

Peaks&Valleys

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How old is her boyfriend?
 

backbreaker

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Peaks&Valleys said:
How old is her boyfriend?
she showed me a pic if i had to guess late 30's early 40's

been going to this woman for 3 years we have a pretty good report and we shoot the **** sometimes
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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logicallefty

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Bokanovsky said:
I'm glad that you are finally getting professional help, which you clearly need. Unfortunately, it seems like you are getting it from the wrong source. A 50-year-old broad that wears "fvck me pumps" and talks about her boyfriend and "what women want"? Are you seriously paying money for that? Just find some bored housewife at the mall and chat her up. She'd talk about that sh!t all day for free.
Where in the f\_/ck did this come from? What did backbreaker do to you to make you think he "clearly needs" professional help? He is one of the *few* happily married men on this site maybe we can all learn a thing or two from him.

I swear the maturity level on here is going downhill fast. WTF????

Bokanovsky, why don't you go pick on the high schoolers in the HS forum. You are clearly acting like one.
 

zekko

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BB, I do have to wonder why you are seeing a therapist/psychologist/psychiatrist/whatever. I know you've talked about it before, but I forgot. I can't imagine paying someone to talk to them for three years, even if I did believe in shrinks (which I don't). Maybe you're becoming too Californian :rolleyes:
 

evan12

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zekko said:
BB, I do have to wonder why you are seeing a therapist/psychologist/psychiatrist/whatever. I know you've talked about it before, but I forgot. I can't imagine paying someone to talk to them for three years, even if I did believe in shrinks (which I don't). Maybe you're becoming too Californian :rolleyes:
I thought BB is the most happy person in this forum, did I miss something during my absent from this forums ?
 

Bokanovsky

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logicallefty said:
He is one of the *few* happily married men on this site maybe we can all learn a thing or two from him.
Either you're a little naive or you haven't read enough of his posts. BB has been trolling this board for over a decade. He's not even a real person - at least not the person he pretends to be on this board. He's been exposed as a fraud by Burroughs and others on a number of occasions. Do a search before you start jumping out of your skin white-knighting for BB.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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speed dawg

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Can we finally close the book on backbreaker and ban his fairy @ss? If this post, then his subsequent follow ups, haven't proven that he's nothing more than a pimple on this site's asscrack, then nothing will. I'm really just not sure about the moderators' agendas over the past few months/years. Why is this self-absorbed tool allowed to remain?
 

logicallefty

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To all of you Detectives on this site like Bokanovsky and speed_dawg who have done an FBI level background checks on backbreaker, please list/articulate your accusations against him? I and I'm sure many others are curious. Truth be told I haven't background checked him or any poster on SS. I take what people post at face value. Please enlighten us with your investigation. Maybe we can all learn something.
 

zekko

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evan12 said:
I thought BB is the most happy person in this forum, did I miss something during my absent from this forums ?
I think the shrink visits have something to do with his previous drug use. Still, I can't imagine going to sessions like that for three years unless I was court ordered to do so. And even then I'd be looking for ways to get out of it. Doesn't sound like much fun to me.
 

taiyuu_otoko

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zekko said:
I can't imagine going to sessions like that for three years unless I was court ordered to do so. And even then I'd be looking for ways to get out of it. Doesn't sound like much fun to me.
Shrinks operate a lot like the government. They "solve" problems, but in doing so they create/unearth more "problems" that require more problem solving, which create more problems...ad infinitum.

If you've got the cash or insurance, and you're willing to pay, I imagine most shrinks would be glad to keep you coming for a good while.

Just imagine of other businesses operated that way. Like if you took your car in to get it fixed, and he fixed on problem, and purposely created another so you'd keep coming back.

Obviously if people had a specific problem they wanted to fix (like a leaky radiator hose) and the psych kept bring out more junk, they would go somewhere else.

Must be something else going on. (In the general shrink-patient relationship).

Need for validation? Need for approval? Need for emotional maintenance?

I used to teach English in Japan, and a lot of adult students didn't study because they wanted to learn English, they just wanted somebody to talk to on a regular basis, that they knew would always be there and never reject them.

That kind of stability could be comforting to a LOT of people.
 

Die Hard

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Seriously, guys... Just don't read BB's posts if they annoy you, it's that simple.

As I see it, people can start threads for several reasons:

1. To seek advice
2. To give advice
3. To think out loud, write down their thoughts like one does in a diary.

Many of BB's threads fall into the third category. These threads are like rhetorical questions, it seems like the writer is asking for a response but he really isn't. You don't have to read them and you don't have to reply to them, no one is forcing you to do either...

Furthermore, the guy gives good advice here and there and sometimes has interesting thoughts to share. Read and absorb anything that's helpful from his posts and ignore anything that annoys you from his posts, no need to get all worked up!
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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