I started this thread 11 years ago.
And now I'm posting an update 6 years after the last post.
A lot of things have changed, to say the least.
In the last 6 or so years, I have traveled half the world and slept with dozens of women from virtually every continent. Pretty much all the sexual fantasies I've ever had came true. I re-read this thread just now and I can hardly recognize myself in my writing. It's been a struggle for sure, but things have worked out better than I could ever imagine on this front. They really, really did. I almost forgot how ****ty the place was where I came from.
I've started my own business around the time I made the last post and it is really growing into something. It's not making me rich yet, but it makes me happy, and no-one's telling me what to do. Satisfaction is here, and I'm confident the money will follow eventually.
Life has brought its triumphs and tragedies as life does, but I managed to make the most of it and have an overall good experience. I have managed to stay on the right path most of the time and it has lead to good things.
And the girl I talked about in that previous post? I'm marrying her soon. I can't wait to start the next chapter in life with her, and I can't believe I want to settle down because hooking up with random women is boring to me at this point. I'm looking forward to the prospect of starting a family and having children. This might sound horrible to you now as you read this, but you need to understand that being in your early 30s brings a different outlook on life than being in your late teens (when I started this thread). You'll probably understand when you get there, even though I'm well aware that that makes me sound like an old ****. That's fine.
To stay in-line with the format I established a while back:
Takeaway/things I've learned in this whole process
Things I wish I had heard/seen when I started this
- Be in good physical shape. It's achievable by everyone who's willing to work for it.
- The people who say that's not true and wussies who aren't willing to put in the work. You can do this. But you got to want it, and be willing to hurt and sweat for it. Several times a week.
- There's no excuse for a young guy to be out of shape. I'm in my early 30s at this point and I still manage to be super fit. If you're in your early 20s, you can do this way more easily.
- Go to NerdFitness.com and read everything on there. No need to get into the paid stuff. The free articles tell you all the basic things you need to know. Google and Bing will help you find the rest if you want to get deeper into it.
- Join a boxing/jiu jitsu/krav maga/mma gym. Go there 3 times a week. You'll be amazed what it will do to your body and your character.
- In my personal experience; paleo diet + martial arts will lead to having the body of a Greek God.
- If you're afraid of martial arts, that's a sign it's exactly for you
- Hard work leads to results
- Sometimes not the results you were initially looking for, but results regardless
- This is true for every endeavor
- You will fail
- Fail again
- Then something great will happen
- Then you'll fail again
- And again
- And again
- And ****ing AGAIN!
- When you really feel you want to quit, that's the universe/god/whatever you believe in testing you
- Life is not fair. This is a fact. Accept it because it will always be true no matter what. Don't b1tch about it and move on when it happens to you (and it inevitably will, at multiple points).
- Say on the path. When you feel defeated, that's the exact moment where you need to be strong and push on
- And then things will slowly change
- And you'll still fail
- But it won't matter so much anymore
- And girls will notice that
- You'll develop a different aura around you that's very attractive to women
- It is something that needs to be earned, like respect
- And you'll only earn it by failing a million times, and staying on the path despite of that
- There's a big chance that the things you learned from failing will be useful at a completely unexpected moment, sometimes years later. It's a tired cliche, but there is truth in failing your way to success. So embrace it, don't be afraid of it.
- The final takeaway of this 11-year-old thread should be: Work hard and good things will come to you eventually, regardless what you pursue.
- Be an interesting person first and the rest will follow. Including girls you couldn't even dream about.
- Stick to it. If I can do it, so can you.
If I were aware of this wisdom back when I was struggling with this issue, I'm confident I'd "gotten" it a lot sooner. I still managed to find my way out of my problems, but it took a long time. The things these men discuss in these youtube clips are pure gold nuggets of wisdom. I believe things would had fallen into place a lot sooner if I were aware of it.
Sit down, don't do anything else, and listen to this. It will more than likely change your view on everything. And If you like what you see in these, go down the rabbit hole from there. There's a ton of very profound wisdom to be found here.
If you have any questions about anything at all, I'll be more than happy to answer them.
I'll check into this thread every now and then.