My recent experiences and lessons learned

6ix9ine

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Part 1:

Had this fwb for half a year who in my eyes is like an 8 lookswise (really rare for me to **** someone like that). It was her idea to be fwbs, I wanted to explore having a ltr.
She looks whorish, I liked that. Also we got along well, was pretty cool. Let's call her girl1.
That fwb situation made me chase other women, I rlly didn't want her to be the only girl I see, bc I knew I'd get oneitis otherwise.

I inhaled all "game" **** that I saw on YouTube and went nofap, that got me really motivated to ****. Some of my friends thought I was retarded bc I was only talking about girls all the time. Srsly I think some of them don't want to hang out as much anymore bc they couldn't relate with me anymore.
I even made out with that one tinder date, who was the date of a friend of mine in front of his eyes. Then I fingered this mediocre looking girl in front of her eyes (was a wild party).

I ****ed like 12 other chicks during that time. To me that's a lot.
Some of them ugly some of them hot, some of them average, some of them prostitutes lol.
I even banged this one girl that I thought I could never bang, that I thought was out of my league. I found out she was pretty crazy and that rlly turned me off.
She looksmaxed pretty hard with silicone tits, makeup and insane outfits.

Befriending some girls and then ****ing some of their friends or friends of their friends or instagram followers, that worked too.

During that time I got to know 2 girls that I thought would be gr8 gf material, but we just had a first date and a kiss and then they ghosted me.

There was this 17 year old girl, I came on her titties on the first date, however, I didn't enter her ***** because she was a virgin. She said it was her first time doing stuff like that. Omg she was so ****ing nervous and **** when saying bye she was so scared that I wouldn't call back anymore.

Then there was this 19 year old girl, the sex was soooo amazing!! But it was just so boring to talk to her. She told me I'm manipulative, don't listen, live in my own bubble and like don't really respond much to what she's saying. Tbh I just thought she was boring to talk to, I was on mushrooms some of the time and I resented her a little bc I was just her second choice, long story.

Then there were these other two 18 year old girls who were interested in me (i'm 31m but look like 25, genetics). I was making out with them and massaging their tits (not at the same time). But they wouldn't gimme their hole (Again, not at the same time). Believe it or not, that made me feel like I fell in love with them and made me think of them constantly¿? That was weird and I learned that infatuation is:

infatuation, attachment = interest + investment + scarcity + how bad you need someone because u're unhappy

The more you invest, the more you feel attached. When someone ****s with your mind, like rejects you or somehow triggers you, does you wrong what happens is you may start to think about that person or situation constantly. And that makes you think you fell in love/you became attached, but that's not love, it is obsessing and wanting to fix "oh my god, i'm overtly not loved, not accepted".

However, if a person is too scarce, at one point infatuation/attachment just turns into resentment and you start detaching. And you get your pain body triggered and getting all the feels of not being enough and not being accepted for who you are and being sad and lonely. Omg that can really send you in a downward spiral and temporarily **** up all aspects of your life, your whole energy is wasted on coping.

Anyway, what ended up happening is I dumped all girls out of my life, even my favourite girl1 that i've been seeing since half a year. Even though she invited me to her birthday, whatever I don't care.

Because I realized I was just getting too ****ed up mentally. Getting breadcrumbs of attention and intimacy, highs and lows, rejections, I put too much focus on women and not enough focus on me and my balance and mental health.
"Dumping" girl1 hurt me a lot and I was basically a depressed potato for a whole month. But also I'm really proud of myself.

Usually in past (real) relationships I was the one to ***** and complain and hope for things to get better, only to realize they never would. While my energy was drained so low and then she would just dump me and I would just be a depressed wreck.
 
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6ix9ine

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Part 2:
  • Nowadays I got a list of qualities that a girl should meet for her to be girlfriend material, omg who can even match this
  • Nowadays I'm more sure of my ability to dump a girl that's no good for me, even when I'm emotionally attached to her
  • Nowadays I'm not nervous anymore when I talk to an attractive girl on a date
  • Nowadays I think I know my limits, I just won't ever effortlessly, constantly pull extremely hot, willing girls. You gotta be some kind of super-sexy-looking guy or celebrity with good game to do that. Like, imagine you were a 10/10 guy and then just get the Tinder *****s and **** a new girl every day. I don't even get matches on Tinder at all. This one extremely good looking guy that a friend matched on Tinder. Her and me and him were on this home-party and they almost didn't talk AT ALL, he still ended up banging her on the loft bed for everybody to hear.
  • Nowadays I'm not scared or hesitant to escalate to kissing and ****ing anymore, btw I should like tone it down in this regard and just take it more slowly, not every woman is a ***** that wants to be banged as quickly as possible
  • Nowadays I don't feel like I've missed out on not having had sex with enough women (I'm at 40 laycount now)
  • Nowadays I don't feel like having sex is something super super special. To me what's more special is having a great connection AND having sex or having sex with a girl that is super hot.
  • I realize getting validation and sex from women, it can be a drug-like-high that can make you feel like you're a total boss. And trying to get to know women and banging them it is kind of like gambling, you never know what's coming and the chance of "winning" keeps you hooked. However, the low is real and it can be really low.
  • People who claim being in a relationship is cool and look down on people who have casual sex, that's BS. There's phases in your life where you prefer one thing, and then there's phases where you prefer the other thing, there's no right or wrong. But yea, don't collect them std's too much.
  • Learning how to deal with rejection is sooo crucial. It's just painful, and also as women you're not getting rejected as much cause you're more on the passive side, you're being approached generally. Kinda unfair. The book "The power of now" yeah that helped me deal with rejection/breakups and holidays and meeting a real friend 1on1, being in nature, meeting ur family, and just being sad and lonely and going through the feelings
  • Invest in yourself first
  • Having friends that are girls, that's cool, you can clearly see how it works on the other side. And you can see their issues and how they really are, they're kind of retarded, just like us, but maybe worse haha. How would you expect someone like that to always act reasonably??!
  • If you don't see a girl as potential GF material and just want to bang her, don't waste months writing back and forth, only to find out after meeting her in a different city that she doesn't want to ****, she just kind of needed attention bc her mother is absent and her father is fleeing from the police
  • Game is real when you're not totally ugly. One of my friends is short and kinda ugly and drinks every day, the other one is just a little of short and bald. Both have ****ed a lot, the kinda ugly one like 50, and the other one he won't tell me how many. The kinda ugly one laughs a lot and is also super-confident (without any reason) and super non-needy, is great at giving a girl attention and then withdrawing it. I think he drinks and makes the girls drunk and then they **** but mostly the girls don't ever want to go for round 2. Some of the girls he ****ed were rlly goodlooking omg, made me really question myself, like what am I doing wrong. And yea also a couple of years ago I met this guy who lives with his parents and just played League of Legends all the time and he claimed a laycount of 50, but I think mostly dorky weird nerdy girls like him.
  • In the end it's just going for it: Get to know somehow, meet, talk, touch and kiss, ask to go home together, ****. Voilá, no RSD hours long videos needed
  • A few nights ago I talked to this taxi driver, who claimed a laycount of 100 in only one year when he was younger. He was a professional soccer player, lived in a dormitory. Said he was tall, good looking, sporty, big mouth, was telling the girls fairy stories. Now here he is (probably 50-55m) driving me in a taxi, he's been married since 10 years. Idk about you but when I'm kinda old I don't want to drive around people in a taxi, I would want to chill with my other rich friends on an island and smoke pot and pay some bitches to suck my viagra-****
  • There's people in your social circle who will look at you as being a looser because you tie your self worth to ****ing bitches or just because you **** a lot of bitches, you're a male slut and SOME women will look down on you or like make fun of you, don't take you seriously anymore
  • Your time watching PUA stuff may be better spent on watching relationship-related youtube videos, just try it and see if that feels like more value
Last week a new girl and I ****ed raw-dog in the bathroom in a club. And this 18 year old virgin with F-sized titties was at my place, gave me a back massage, but didn't want to kiss nor have sex. She told me she's a sociopath with no friends and somehow I didn't care because we got along really well and her tits are amazing.

I feel really retarded: This huge part of my thinking revolves around trying to find the best woman possible and turning myself into the most attractive version of myself possible. It's retarded when you think about how much of my ego is tied to this. And how much I'm willing to do for this (looksmaxing and approaching).

When the real problems out there are global warming and hunger and wars and whoa there are so many more important things that need attention.
But no, here I am just thinking about getting the best ***** possible.

Thanks for reading and treasure your reciprocal friendships
And remember: There are many ways of ****ing up your life, I hope you can live a peaceful life of balanced out activies and interests :). Any comments welcome
 

mrgoodstuff

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Part 1:

Had this fwb for half a year who in my eyes is like an 8 lookswise (really rare for me to **** someone like that). It was her idea to be fwbs, I wanted to explore having a ltr.
She looks whorish, I liked that. Also we got along well, was pretty cool. Let's call her girl1.
That fwb situation made me chase other women, I rlly didn't want her to be the only girl I see, bc I knew I'd get oneitis otherwise.

I inhaled all "game" **** that I saw on YouTube and went nofap, that got me really motivated to ****. Some of my friends thought I was retarded bc I was only talking about girls all the time. Srsly I think some of them don't want to hang out as much anymore bc they couldn't relate with me anymore.
I even made out with that one tinder date, who was the date of a friend of mine in front of his eyes. Then I fingered this mediocre looking girl in front of her eyes (was a wild party).

I ****ed like 12 other chicks during that time. To me that's a lot.
Some of them ugly some of them hot, some of them average, some of them prostitutes lol.
I even banged this one girl that I thought I could never bang, that I thought was out of my league. I found out she was pretty crazy and that rlly turned me off.
She looksmaxed pretty hard with silicone tits, makeup and insane outfits.

Befriending some girls and then ****ing some of their friends or friends of their friends or instagram followers, that worked too.

During that time I got to know 2 girls that I thought would be gr8 gf material, but we just had a first date and a kiss and then they ghosted me.

There was this 17 year old girl, I came on her titties on the first date, however, I didn't enter her ***** because she was a virgin. She said it was her first time doing stuff like that. Omg she was so ****ing nervous and **** when saying bye she was so scared that I wouldn't call back anymore.

Then there was this 19 year old girl, the sex was soooo amazing!! But it was just so boring to talk to her. She told me I'm manipulative, don't listen, live in my own bubble and like don't really respond much to what she's saying. Tbh I just thought she was boring to talk to, I was on mushrooms some of the time and I resented her a little bc I was just her second choice, long story.

Then there were these other two 18 year old girls who were interested in me (i'm 31m but look like 25, genetics). I was making out with them and massaging their tits (not at the same time). But they wouldn't gimme their hole (Again, not at the same time). Believe it or not, that made me feel like I fell in love with them and made me think of them constantly¿? That was weird and I learned that infatuation is:

infatuation, attachment = interest + investment + scarcity + how bad you need someone because u're unhappy

The more you invest, the more you feel attached. When someone ****s with your mind, like rejects you or somehow triggers you, does you wrong what happens is you may start to think about that person or situation constantly. And that makes you think you fell in love/you became attached, but that's not love, it is obsessing and wanting to fix "oh my god, i'm overtly not loved, not accepted".

However, if a person is too scarce, at one point infatuation/attachment just turns into resentment and you start detaching. And you get your pain body triggered and getting all the feels of not being enough and not being accepted for who you are and being sad and lonely. Omg that can really send you in a downward spiral and temporarily **** up all aspects of your life, your whole energy is wasted on coping.

Anyway, what ended up happening is I dumped all girls out of my life, even my favourite girl1 that i've been seeing since half a year. Even though she invited me to her birthday, whatever I don't care.

Because I realized I was just getting too ****ed up mentally. Getting breadcrumbs of attention and intimacy, highs and lows, rejections, I put too much focus on women and not enough focus on me and my balance and mental health.
"Dumping" girl1 hurt me a lot and I was basically a depressed potato for a whole month. But also I'm really proud of myself.

Usually in past (real) relationships I was the one to ***** and complain and hope for things to get better, only to realize they never would. While my energy was drained so low and then she would just dump me and I would just be a depressed wreck.
The alternative is being more selfish more into yourself. Females feeling the way you used to. Feeling not enough.
 

6ix9ine

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Yea wait for part 2 bro, the lessons learned, I posted it as a reply to this topic, but it is awaiting moderator approval. o_O
 

lamath

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Learning from past experience and self reflection is crucial.

thanks for sharing
 
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Julian

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i just read all this. i can rellate fully. the lows can be really low. the whole relationship dynamic with the pain of rejection, looksmaxxing. oneitis etc. I think you wrote a really solid post that ties it altogether. if anything its actually a sad case study on what the modern male goes through. not in the self pity form of thinking but in the way we have been brought up. to think being a male slut with no kids and just lives for themselves is the end all be all. it reminds me of a meme i saw that showed some rich looking dude in a suit an benz standing alone and then the next pic was some alpha looking dude with a beautiful wife holding some kids and a shotgun or some **** looking patriotic and nuclear family as all fuk. and i get everyone has different priorities...

but the most fulfilled ive been was when i had a girl who loved me for me and was down for me on all fronts for about 4 years and then I fked it up. she wanted a marriage and family and she deserved it but i wanted that bachelor playboy lifestyle and its been an empty road thus far. i pray to God i didnt blow it forever because in our society today people just look miserable and lonely. i experience bouts of loneliness and im a decently popular aesthetic guy with the car, clothes, body, job etc. so i can only imagine how it is how for the lower level males out there. sad **** man.

i ended up going through some very dark stages of sexual depravity and have come full circle to just wanting some real connections and relationships. sex has replaced loved and its fked up
 

6ix9ine

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Bro thank you for your words, I really feel this.
Sad to hear about the girl who you fvcked it up with. I'm sure you'll find another one. What good will it do to you to think otherwise?

As far as I can tell, the uglier men nowadays just don't fvck around that much and just settle down with some other ugly chick and they try to stay together for life and just get along. They just get together with someone out of companionship and not because she looks like a model/pornstar.

I'm a decent guy as well, my apartment is pretty cool, I have nice clothes, some cool friends, I even make 10k$ a month lol.

>i ended up going through some very dark stages of sexual depravity and have come full circle to just wanting some real connections and relationships. sex has replaced loved and its fked up

Yea, i can relate. At least now you and me won't feel like we missed out on the bachelor playboy lifestyle.
I mean women, they do it too, right. Riding the **** carousel and then at one point they have enough of it. We just ride the ***** carousel and have enough of it at one point.
Oh wait, here is the next trap: Expecting a relationship to make you feel whole.
Really wanting a relationship and kind of needing it to feel complete, that can really set you up for staying in a relationship that is toxic for you.

We humans always strive to get something and once we arrive there, after a certain point, we will find ways to become unhappy again and we'll want to go for the next thing. I'm not saying don't go for what you want, but me I have to constantly remind myself that theoretically everything is cool.
I mean I make a lot of money, I live in a major European city in a central apartment, constantly traveling, I have so much free time it is insane, I have some cool friends, I have a few real-supportive friends, I ****ed a lotta girls, I get invited to cool exclusive parties. I think most people in the world would want to have my lifestyle, but I still manage to feel lonely or sad at times. And you know what, maybe that's ok. Maybe there just is no solution. Maybe you'll find a great relationship again. And then maybe it will go to **** again. And then one day we die and maybe all of it was just to procreate and feed humanity. I think humans are just not designed to be content with what we achieve.

I think nowadays, we're often overstimulated. Overstimulated with information, processed food, excitement, fear. And we overstimulate ourselves, we cloud our brains with thoughts about the past, the future, information about pua, red/blue/black/purple pill, mgtow, lms, inceldom, how-to-be-successful information etc. It feeds our anxieties and loneliness and then we feel worse and what do we do, we might consume more of what makes us feel worse.

I think all of this is ok, but only in moderation. I know myself. I think I am like many of you guys here:
I'm the type of guy to go all-in and immerse myself in subjects or activities and then go overboard and when I start to see the downsides I'm like "ahhw fvck it, this is not the real deal, or like ahw this is not the solution to my problems". And then I would either hang on to it way too long or abandon it completely.
But no, can you see how this is retarded?

Julian, I guess casual sex or deprived sex is great, just too much of it can be bad for us.
Same thing with nofap. Yea nofap is great, but how about just fapping once a week.

Nowadays, I'm doing sh1t or walking around outside and I try to think things like:

"Oh, there is a tree. I'm walking. I'm walking right now."
"I'm walking, this car is red."

Like I can't shut off my thoughts that fvck me up, thinking about things that happened with girls in the past or might happen in the future. So I just try to think of really simple things in the present moment. This breaks the cycle of feeding your pain with more painful thoughts, it's what I learned in the book "power of now". The overthinking really depletes you of your energy. This helps a little.

Two days ago I was sick in bed, just binge-watching all Face LMS Videos. I think this manosphere material somehow is kind of addictive.

Some pain will always be part of our lives, no matter how many goals we reach, or how present we are and I guess that's ok.

What do we really want? Do we want a lot of amazing bitches to fvck just like in porn videos? We may not have expected the drawbacks of trying to pursue this. Or do we just want peace of mind? Maybe we want something in the middle or just like a relationship with someone who is accepting of us, yea. Where it is more about a healthy relationship, companionship and accepting. And less about ego-validation.
Until you feel like you want to bang as many *****s as possible again. xD

Good luck <3
 

Julian

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@6ix9ine yeah man living in the moment is definitely key...i feel like we as men have been programmed and sold a dream. And so have women. It is what it is. Heartbreak and pain is part of life infact i dare say life is suffering to a degree in one way or the other. Cant know the sweet without the bitter.
 
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6ix9ine

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@Julian yea man!!

@Solomon No, I'm in Berlin, Germany. Yea people have told me on occasion that I am kind of shallow. Oh, interesting. You have a book about your experiences. Can I purchase the pdf somewhere? Or is the only way to sign up for a free trial on that website?

@Spaz A summary for you:
I tried to bang a lot of girls, banged some. Had a great time, felt high and boosted ego.
Then had pretty bad times, dealing with rejections and breaking up with fwb and feelings of emptiness and felt really low.
Feeling disillusioned, like trying to bang a lotta girls, woah that won't rlly make me happy long term. (duhh)

Now feeling ok and trying to balance myself with exercises in being present and hanging out with real friends.

Realized I was overdoing this and it really threw me off balance in the end.
Realized chasing women and getting their validation can be addictive and can feel a bit like drug and maybe shouldn't be the main focus of your life for extended periods of time :D.
Realized while this phase had its drawbacks I did learn a lot!
Realized I should invest more in myself and wellbeing / mental health instead.
Realized overthinking rlly kills the fun in all of this.

:*
Thx a lot for your responses


namaste
I think I'll go for serial monogamy, maxing my SMV also while in a relationship. And being more ruthless with my standards -> dumping faster.
 
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Solomon

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@Julian yea man!!

@Solomon No, I'm in Berlin, Germany. Yea people have told me on occasion that I am kind of shallow. Oh, interesting. You have a book about your experiences. Can I purchase the pdf somewhere? Or is the only way to sign up for a free trial on that website?

@Spaz A summary for you:
I tried to bang a lot of girls, banged some. Had a great time, felt high and boosted ego.
Then had pretty bad times, dealing with rejections and breaking up with fwb and feelings of emptiness and felt really low.
Feeling disillusioned, like trying to bang a lotta girls, woah that won't rlly make me happy long term. (duhh)

Now feeling ok and trying to balance myself with exercises in being present and hanging out with real friends.

Realized I was overdoing this and it really threw me off balance in the end.
Realized chasing women and getting their validation can be addictive and can feel a bit like drug and maybe shouldn't be the main focus of your life for extended periods of time :D.
Realized while this phase had its drawbacks I did learn a lot!
Realized I should invest more in myself and wellbeing / mental health instead.
Realized overthinking rlly kills the fun in all of this.

:*
Thx a lot for your responses


namaste
I think I'll go for serial monogamy, maxing my SMV also while in a relationship. And being more ruthless with my standards -> dumping faster.
The book is free OP

Wie geht es dir meine deutche bruder?

WOW i didn't it was that bad in Deutchland now, the way you described it, I thought you were talking about LA, but it's no secret deutche madchen move hella fast, maybe even faster than american women.

I lived in Deutchland for awhile, great place to slay...well it was 16 years ago don't know about now
 

Spaz

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@Spaz A summary for you:
I tried to bang a lot of girls, banged some. Had a great time, felt high and boosted ego.
Then had pretty bad times, dealing with rejections and breaking up with fwb and feelings of emptiness and felt really low.
Feeling disillusioned, like trying to bang a lotta girls, woah that won't rlly make me happy long term. (duhh)

Now feeling ok and trying to balance myself with exercises in being present and hanging out with real friends.

Realized I was overdoing this and it really threw me off balance in the end.
Realized chasing women and getting their validation can be addictive and can feel a bit like drug and maybe shouldn't be the main focus of your life for extended periods of time :D.
Realized while this phase had its drawbacks I did learn a lot!
Realized I should invest more in myself and wellbeing / mental health instead.
Realized overthinking rlly kills the fun in all of this.

:*
Thx a lot for your responses


namaste
I think I'll go for serial monogamy, maxing my SMV also while in a relationship. And being more ruthless with my standards -> dumping faster.
This is the 2nd thread I'm reading that has the word validation, the other was on the science thread from a self proclaimed alpha.

When you use the word validation in any sentence it shows ur state of mind.

The state of mind of a man who is struggling to come to terms with who he is right now.

Basically it's a feminine trait, that need to be validated because women are inherently deeply insecure since their only true ability or genius is manipulation.

A man on the other hand have a higher purpose because he has ability or potential to exceed far into the realm of the impossible and make it possible.

Find that purpose.

1st know ur inherent personality then use ur inherent gifts to propel yourself into greatness.

When you're achieved even a modicum of greatness, you'll realise that women are like a hobby or a part time job whilst ur full time job has attaining greatness within ur purpose.

Again, find that purpose.
 
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