"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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JSH

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Lol, ****ed up big time, at that party, i had a girl so much all over me that my m8s are all saying i pulled her, but i never consumated it. I was just too lethargic.

Then i went down to Oxford for my interview, it was wicked, i made loads of friends and had real fun. I partied hard and played hard, and did a tiny bit of being interviewed.

Although now i feel so fu(ked up, having spent such a long time away and up till 2 every morning and then up latest at 8. But i could not sleep as i had too many mixed drinks involving coke. I do not think that i have had more sleep than that for about a month now. Im so crazy, nearly the holidays though.

Well i picked up about 5 girls and did not kiss a single one of them, i turned myself off two of them, one of them lost interest in me picking her up (and then getting pissed off my head) and two others pretty much were pissed with me when i left (the day they were leaving) as i never kissed any of them or hell even tried to get that far.

I kept feeling, ah well lets get laid here, then at least something good came out of it and its perfect if i can say i got laid there. So i half heartedly tried, but my heart wasnt in it. It felt more like a chore, so i just drank and pissed around with my friends instead.#

Plus points; left not feeling too bad, with lots of new friends, some new phone numbers (girls) and had a real good time.

However; i think i have to lay off the booze, i can take it (i think) and was pretty much in a better condition than everyone else despite drinking more. But it just took away my sex drive, even when one of the girls was rubbing up against my crotch, i just could not be bothered. That might have been a side effect of my exhaustion.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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JSH

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I dont think any of you lot care; but i called my headmaster a **** today. Pretty much he was standing there talking to two parents, i waved at him and said goodbye you ****, walked off. My m8s thought i was talking to one of them, but i looked at the head as i said it. :D, that felt good, the bastard has not done anything for me since he joined last year. In fact i do not know one good thing that he has done, since he came, has he done anything.
 

Cloud-uk

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Heh heh, good. I've managed to keep on good terms with my teachers, but if they don't do their job right you should tell them so.

Glad to hear Oxford was good! Two of my mates came back, must have gone the same time as you, saying it was boring as- nothing to do. I was sitting there thinking...well why the hell didn't you make something happen!?! Any reccomendations for pubs & clubs? I'm off on sunday.

The 'I can't be arsed' thing is a total *****. I've been so knackered this week with drama and coursework that I have just had no desire to make an effort. Shame about the missed oppertunities though.
 

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Well, merton's college bar was serving interviewees, i dont think the others were. Find someone in merton and go to their bar. Go to one of the many offlicenses eg. Oddbins, Sainsburys locals, then go to your colleges JCR and drink.

There is a very nice pub called "the Bear" which served me, wine bars were quite good at serving me. However, most places operated a one ID, one drink policy, ie you need to have IDs for everyone that comes out with you.

Try and avoid the studenty looking places, as its holidays, so there are very few students there, meaning that they ID everyone; you really need an Oxford ID card to their student drink prices, so its a bit pointless. In addition, they know that it is interviewee week, so the strict ones will be on the lookout.

Either go to the really grubby locals (where there might be a little bit of trouble, as the Oxford locals h8 the university students) or go to the smarter looking wine bars (where i wasnt even IDd as i looked old enough).

As you can tell, i did quite a bit of research and also spoke to my m8s who were done there. Whatever happens, have fun.
 

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Oh yeah, and i have a date now, no idea what im gonna do, i think go for a coffee. It was her birthday yesterday so im thinking i should have got her a present; actually my presence is enough of a present.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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JSH

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Had a coffee, went for a wander with her, while she did not shut me down, it felt awkward as i dont think she is that experienced (probably never even kissed a guy). Damn it, i just felt like such a b4stard. She was already saying next time i see you though, i must have made a good enough impression.

Totally forgot it was her birthday, ill meet up with her before christmas and buy her a little nick nack/ necklace when im with her, so she can remember me. Plus i can gauge interest, if she turns up next time wearing it, then ill know im in there.

Hell next time ill get the kiss, i reckon i coulda got it today, but as i said i felt like a b4stard.

It was good but not awesome, anyway im visitin a girl tommorrow (who i think wants to be my booty call). Might meet up with that one again.
 

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so many 2day, what the **** am i on.

I just watched Scarface again, Tony Montana manages to remind me of myself; he fu(ks up everything that he comes into contact with. He is consumed by the pursuit of money and manages to kill or drive away everyone who cares about himself. Although my gohones are not quite as cracked and warped as his. (and i would never break rule no. 2, messing with my own supply)

I met up with today, very nice girl, very nice and blonde and pretty, can even put up with me. Then we chilled for two hours, i didnt even fu(king hold her hand, i had no guts, i was crawling like a worm in the garden. Then i missed my train, arriving home late and letting down my parents.

Was on the phone to my booty call, who owes me, now shes fu(king meeting up with a flame. She keeps going on about how i have hurt her, i was on the phone to her, she was going on about what id done to her and how she felt i was using her. I never even fu(king did anything to her. She was offended that i was not bothered that she was meeting up with him, i was a bit pissed but ill live. Especially since she offered me first and i hadnt replied.

Hell im slightly jealous, acted like i wasnt and now she h8s me. Suppose its all my fault. Fu(k it all. I feel like Montana at the end when he dares them to do their worst.

Now im kinda depressed, in a state of catharsis, my most common state.
 

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Hey, she had a change of heart, she rang me while i was out and was "im all alone, you wanna come over and watch the big game". No, im busy.

Then texted me to go to pub later. I was too busy.

Tough sh1t for her. Feels so good to know that i can get a girl creaming herself down a phone trying to get me to come over and relieve her.
 

JSH

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Don't get behind on my work, the further behind i get, the more i have to catch up.
 

JSH

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WORST POSSIBLE THING

****ed up this weekend, seems to be a staple of my life.

Also the WORST POSSIBLE THING HAPPENED, i got an offer from oxford, but its AAAs, ie I have to work.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Cloud-uk

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Mate that's great news! So what if you have to work. At least you have the oppertunity.
 

JSH

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PPE, its good as its another opportunity, but its more pressure that i dont need
 

JSH

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Well, that weekend, i did kind of **** up (but pulled two teachers at another school in quick succession) - i was away for a wedding.
Also chatted up an off duty police woman - i know im dreadful, i was under age in an over 21s bar.

Im not doing enough revision, time to pull the finger out. I have to revise.

Although i was away friday to monday, i have been spending far too much time and money in the pub. I am pleased that I have managed to buy everyone Christmas presents and have them wrapped (except for the small effect of me losing my mums, i hid it so well).

Spent about £100 in the pub in the last week, its ridiculous, im too generous, i buy my m8s drinks too much. Its not even from buying girls drinks, that includes about two drinks for girls - most on spirits for myself. I hate it, i have to drink everyone under the table, its competitiveness for me. My New Year's Resolution is going to be not to take drinking so competitively. The way its going, the only way ill stop a shots competition is when my liver packs in.

Oh yeah led to a pull on Tuseday night; i was playing around with her body all night and kissed her, but then she had to go. "My kiss wasn't that bad was it, darling", she was getting given a lift back. But damn it, shoulda started kissing her earlier that evening. Anyway she made me promise to meet up. Carpe Diem - seize the F***in day, i have to start sooner. She was mine, i just wasnt arsed about it.

She keeps calling me arrogant, i think i have to stop trying to persuade girls im not, i have my most success, when they think im arrogant. Something that brought home to me how far iv come, is when a girl i know went through my phone book and called out random girls names and i was like yeah did her, picked her up at x, pulled her, shes well buff. I felt like such a player.

I think i have to tone down the social proofing of myself about me though, especially about girls to other girls. Its the ones i dont prove myself to that are the most interested in me, the others think that they are just going to be added to a list. Which actually isnt true, there are good reasons why most of them did not turn into longer term prospects.

Keep meeting up with this girl accidently (she lives on my road) whose made me promise to go out with her on friday. I also promised to meet up with another gal before Xmas. This is crazy. See if i can meet up with all three in one day.

There is also a booty call possible somewhere there. Im so confused, lets sort out my life.


AND I STILL HAVE TO DO A HELL OF A LOT OF REVISION
 

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Update

Now i dont know if any of you lot are gonna bother to read this, but it makes me feel good so bear with me.

Well, i didnt meet up with either of the other two before christmas. HAPPY NEW YEAR btw

The Girl i mentioned pulling in my last post ^, well we had liked each other from the moment we had first met, on a school trip. I had actually pushed her back over a table and lent on top, i had felt she had wanted me to kiss her, but i was scared, so i didnt. Later I had thrown her to her mattress, she was sleeping downstairs and everyone else had gone away. She had pulled me down on top of her and nothing had happened. I was just too scared, i wanted the girl to make the move. I found out when i met up with her after that, that i had gone on so much about another girl, that she thought i had a girlfriend.

That is something that commonly happens, girls assume i have a girlfriend and get turned off me/ move onto my friends, even if i was the one that went and picked them up. I hate that, then later they are confused when i tell them why did you leave me, oh i thought you had a gf. Mayb at times i can be too confident and too social proofed with other girls, is that possible. Iv twice been asked; why dont you got a girlfriend. Its really weird.

Well i had fun with that girl, it took us about 3 hours to do the 20 min walk back to her house. That was cool, although i started to go into school playing fields, she made some comments about getting muddy and then told me shed show me the proper climbing place. I was so pissed i forgot about it when we were closer to it and i think she was so busy with her hands that she forgot. So damn it i didnt get laid, but hey.


Anyway, the real reason for this post is that i am dissappointed in myself, i passed up so many opportunities for a pull on Friday. At a gathering which i started to organise and then delegated to a friend as i was slightly scared of phoning up and inviting out lots of people.

I saw two fit girls come in and then leave immediately, i had to phone a girl to try to get her to come down for a m8, so i went outside after them. They were counting their money, got some ec, made me feel cool, especially as i was on the phone, asking for a girl. First DAMN: i wish i had gone then and offered to buy them a drink (even though i hate doing that).

I went back in, followed quickly by them. I was at the bar buying drinks, i got long EC from the fittest one, they were sitting at table on the other side, having been joined by soome friends, with a big bottle of wine. My ****y, m8, ginger1 was a little dissapointed as he wanted to buy them drinks. DAMN 2: i shoulda gone up and said something along the lines of "I think you are pretty cute too".

LAter when i was back at the bar they came up to where my m8s were playing pool and started chatting/flirting, trying to get involved. Of the 12 of us, 3 were really going for it. I was slightly cut out as i had been at the bar and therefore missed the intro.

I kinda got involved and started talking, but as there were so many guys, they really talked to the ones that they knew the names of, three of my m8s. Like they set learning those three names as their targets; im better looking than all of them, that pissed me off.

I got into the second fittest one there when her and the fittest one went to the bar with my close m8 ginger one. I came up with him and started talking, he then reassured me in front of them that he was not buying them drinks, cos i had warned him not to be so stupid with his money earlier. But did it in such a way, it was obvious i was a spoil sport.

Started talking to the 2 HB when we left and ended up talking to ages, i bought her a drink later when i got bored and had had like 3. Then my female m8s came in (who i had invited but had been busy).

I went over and talked to one of them, who i think is well buff and she told me that the girls had lied to us and were actually two years younger. Ahh well, then most of the girls started to go, including the one i talked to, they all left, she said bye to most of my m8s. Not me, though, mayb i was too deep in convo, DAMN 3, i didnt even get her number. Although i think she said shed come back there next week to see me.

Anyway half hearedly hit on one of the ones that was left: ginger1 ended up getting off with her. My heart wasnt in it, she had a pot belly. Another one of my m8s got off with a short fit one. They were both well up for it.

Went on and got pissed at a late night place where i got asked by my m8s boss to go and sort out someone for him who was staring at him. Turned it into a joke with the other bloke, i think his boss was trying to make me into a fool.

Stayed in my m8s house, he lived 1/2 an hour walk, feel so sorry for the guy, his mum was off her face drunk, i didnt even see her. He said shes like it every day. He overshadowed by his older brother, im trying to help him with girls, because i can pick up, its mainly the negative things that go in here. Stayed in hs older bros room (hes away). Ironic as he h8s me as i used to tease him about his gf, she was the girl i talked about at the top (they split up) and he h8s me even more cos i got off with her and he still lusts after her.

Then i had to turn up at school looking all hungover and smashed in my smokey (atmosphere) pub clothes with wax down one leg (someone spilt a candle in the late night place). My Coach (im captain) did not look happy, but my bro had brought my suit (we have to travel smartly) so he cheered up, especially when i showed i could still think.

Went away, played well, we won 3-2, i think i was at fault for our second concession, although we did well against a biased ref. About 8 mins before the end, i went down and buggered up my ankle. 5 hours later, A & E told me iv pulled the three ligaments in it.

Well i have to eat less as im unable to do vigourous sports for two weeks on average. I also need to try to painfully walk on it as it heals best that way. That screwed up my sports DAMN 4

Sorry that this is not real helpful for you guys, but it is for me. Ill post some advice next time.

ahh well life goes on
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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JSH

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Or no, i wont. Im currently reading Mathew Pinsent's autobiography; A lifetime in a race.

Now apart from the fact that i think the title should skip out the a, iv decided that i want to make the university/varsity rowing team, wherever i end up going.

To that end, iv decided i have to become fitter, starting now, even though i have a bust ankle.
 

JSH

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Originally posted by JSH
Or no, i wont. Im currently reading Mathew Pinsent's autobiography; A lifetime in a race.

Now apart from the fact that i think the title should skip out the a, iv decided that i want to make the university/varsity rowing team, wherever i end up going.

To that end, iv decided i have to become fitter, starting now, even though i have a bust ankle.
Well, i went to the gym in sports today and really pushed myself (for how fit i am now and how bust the ankle is).

I did 3 * 1000m ergs and lots of weights: however that was more to get back into the habit.

In addition, i found out that i made a £15 book token; by giving some girl in the year below a piece of homework from last year.
It came top in her class and she was given the token. Lol, im amused. Damn though as it means that my teacher actually thinks i do good work, not cos she fancies me.

My eating habits have gone to hell, cos i am so depressed at the moment. Im trying to get them back on track as well. They are becomming more ingrained in me though.

My work is not getting done, i have to do some now as i am going out 2morro evening. I hate this, why am i not more organised and why cant my teachers set it to us when i didnt have things like resits to worry about.

Roll with the punches

Nik
 

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Well, im nearly through a major piece of work, im impressed by myself.

Im also glad that at least 16 of you clicked on this thread: you are allowed to leave comments; even if they are just telling me to shut up
 

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Lots of accidental clicks on this thread.

Ah well, today my diet was shot to sh1t but its fine, its my off day. Anyway im going out to the opera tonight, but i need to get an essay done for 2morro. This is why i should get my work done before its due in. Damn it.

LESSON OF THE DAY: do your work before its due in


This is something that im always doing. I need to try so hard to get it back on track.
 

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Well, reading www.playboylifestyle.com or rather looking at it after being linked over, i saw something that his natural wing, Shark said, that resonated with me.

This was that he says things that the girls want to hear, tells them they are beautiful and whispers sweet nothings in their ears. I realised that this was what i had been doing when i was successful with girls, especially when id be nice and then be ****y and Funny or neg hit them without realising what i was doing. This put them in their place after i had been very nice to them.

So i showed that i was aware of them, that i wouldnt take any disrespect from them and that i knew what they wanted.

I thought it was an interesting topic.

Ah well, keep browsing boyos.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

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