My girl friend.... ?

[slaog]

I have a girl as a friend who is in a relationship. She's looking to branch swing... we have met a few times and she has given me confusing signals. She says things like we're only friends etc and although we dated she insists we're just friends. I met her online and she doesn't have too many friends.

She knows I'm interested in her and after a long talk we decided we shouldn't meet anymore but next day she suggested meeting up sometimes... just as friends. She mentioned going for weekends away too.

She also told me there are lots of men who want to date her and she also said she's looking for love so naturally I'm thinking she likes me but don't know how much. I told her I'm interested in her and also showed her I'm willing to walk away even if it was hard for me to do and I think this has gained me more respect.

At the start she said she didn't think I'd contact her again because i didn't show much interest which is nonsence... she must be a female AFC to think like that.


Anybody have any thoughts or experiance any similar situations? Should I go by her words or actions. I personally always say actions but maybe she does want to be friends??

 

[Jeffst1980]

Impossible to know for sure without more details on the two of you---i.e. when you dated in relation to her relationship, if you made out with her, if you had sex with her, etc.--but here's my hunch:

She's pulling the "let's meet up as friends" play out of the playbook knowing FULL well that you two will hook up. Of course, she can't outright say that (and neither should you), so this "friends" business gives her a way of saying it "just happened" without taking responsibility. After all, you were "just friends!"

In a TRUE LJBF rejection, a woman usually doesn't want to hang out as friends--it's too awkward and she would feel uncomfortable spending time one on one with a guy that pines for her. LJBF is a REJECTION, not a counter offer. The woman you're dealing with seems to legitimately want to spend time with you--otherwise, she wouldn't bring it up. There clearly is some attraction at play.

She doesn't sound like she's got her s#it together, though, and it would appear that she's a blatant cheater. Personally, I would refuse to do anything with her until she gets that boyfriend out of the picture. Girls like this love the ego boost and drama fix they get from two men fighting over them, but it just complicates things for the new guy.

 

[slaog]

Yeah that sounds accurate!

I'll keep her as a plate... I'm not interested in a relationship with her anymore. She knows that and if something happens it happens. I'll spin other plates too

 

[Hooligan Harry]

Sounds like an AW.

 

[NewMan]

don't worry about whats coming out of her mouth - the way she acts will tell you where you stand.

stop talking so much with her and "just do it"