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My GF wants to arrange a threesome FOR me...

jnMissouri

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New relationship after a recent breakup with a different girl. The girl is hot, put together, well-off, etc. Long story short, laying in bed, she asked me my sexual fantasy. I told her. I asked her why she asked, she said to make sure she pleases me. Next morning after we wake up she said she is going to arrange it for me on a trip in a few months [she clearly thought about it since she didn't say it until the next morning]. Said I can choose to have her involved or two other girls. I asked her why she would do this, allow me to be with other women and even arrange it for me. She said she wants to make sure I'm pleased and she'd rather know about it since she arranged it rather than me doing things behind her back.

I didn't say no. I wasn't sure if it was a test. I don't think it was since I didn't say no exactly and she didn't try to say she now knows I want other women, aha, caught you, etc.

I've periodically joked with her about a threesome with her and her friends or her sister (married). Literally was just teasing her. Not sure what to make of this.

My takeaways are:

1) High interest (she also handed me nearly 1K worth of gifts as part of my holiday gifts, she has more but she wanted me to have these now to wear for her).
2) For her it's about our connection and relationship not sex (as is the case with most women). She'd rather see me happy with other women on the side than me leaving for another woman. I think.
3) It COULD be a test, but we've texted and talked since then and spent an entire day together the day she mentioned this plan. Her interest and initiation of communication is as high as ever. There's no indication that she's upset I'm even entertaining the idea.

Part of me feels like this sounds interesting. Part of me thinks, we're a couple, I shouldn't do this to her. I've had affairs in the past while in relationships and it's not something I wanted to do again, especially with her. But is it cheating if she's arranging it? OK with it? I mean sure, I'd love to have a threesome. With my girl and another girl or two other girls. But if I had to choose between that and my girl, if doing such a thing would cause us issues in the future, I'd choose my girl. I certainly would NOT be ok with the idea of HER being with other guys...
 
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2Rocky

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I dare you to ask her...."Does this mean YOU want to do a threesome with 2 guys as a Fair turnabout?"
 

jnMissouri

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I dare you to ask her...."Does this mean YOU want to do a threesome with 2 guys as a Fair turnabout?"
Fair question. So, I'm 99% sure the answer is no. Not only because she's not the type but because she's told me before if I want to go date other women NOW early on (on a break) I CAN. I asked her why. She said she'd rather be hurt now than really hurt in the future if I wanted to leave for another woman. She told me she wants me to be sure about her. I asked her if that means that if I date other women now, would that mean she would date other men. She said no.

Either way I had told her I wasn't interested. I was dating other women anyways when I met her.
 

RickTheToad

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New relationship after a recent breakup with a different girl. The girl is hot, put together, well-off, etc. Long story short, laying in bed, she asked me my sexual fantasy. I told her. I asked her why she asked, she said to make sure she pleases me. Next morning after we wake up she said she is going to arrange it for me on a trip in a few months [she clearly thought about it since she didn't say it until the next morning]. Said I can choose to have her involved or two other girls. I asked her why she would do this, allow me to be with other women and even arrange it for me. She said she wants to make sure I'm pleased and she'd rather know about it since she arranged it rather than me doing things behind her back.

I didn't say no. I wasn't sure if it was a test. I don't think it was since I didn't say no exactly and she didn't try to say she now knows I want other women, aha, caught you, etc.

I've periodically joked with her about a threesome with her and her friends or her sister (married). Literally was just teasing her. Not sure what to make of this.

My takeaways are:

1) High interest (she also handed me nearly 1K worth of gifts as part of my holiday gifts, she has more but she wanted me to have these now to wear for her).
2) For her it's about our connection and relationship not sex (as is the case with most women). She'd rather see me happy with other women on the side than me leaving for another woman. I think.
3) It COULD be a test, but we've texted and talked since then and spent an entire day together the day she mentioned this plan. Her interest and initiation of communication is as high as ever. There's no indication that she's upset I'm even entertaining the idea.

Part of me feels like this sounds interesting. Part of me thinks, we're a couple, I shouldn't do this to her. I've had affairs in the past while in relationships and it's not something I wanted to do again, especially with her. But is it cheating if she's arranging it? OK with it? I mean sure, I'd love to have a threesome. With my girl and another girl or two other girls. But if I had to choose between that and my girl, if doing such a thing would cause us issues in the future, I'd choose my girl. I certainly would NOT be ok with the idea of HER being with other guys...
Pass on it. Because, as Rollo Tomassi said, she's going to use that against you later on when she wants to do a three some... With another dude.
 

Plinco

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New relationship after a recent breakup with a different girl. The girl is hot, put together, well-off, etc. Long story short, laying in bed, she asked me my sexual fantasy. I told her. I asked her why she asked, she said to make sure she pleases me. Next morning after we wake up she said she is going to arrange it for me on a trip in a few months [she clearly thought about it since she didn't say it until the next morning]. Said I can choose to have her involved or two other girls. I asked her why she would do this, allow me to be with other women and even arrange it for me. She said she wants to make sure I'm pleased and she'd rather know about it since she arranged it rather than me doing things behind her back.

I didn't say no. I wasn't sure if it was a test. I don't think it was since I didn't say no exactly and she didn't try to say she now knows I want other women, aha, caught you, etc.

I've periodically joked with her about a threesome with her and her friends or her sister (married). Literally was just teasing her. Not sure what to make of this.

My takeaways are:

1) High interest (she also handed me nearly 1K worth of gifts as part of my holiday gifts, she has more but she wanted me to have these now to wear for her).
2) For her it's about our connection and relationship not sex (as is the case with most women). She'd rather see me happy with other women on the side than me leaving for another woman. I think.
3) It COULD be a test, but we've texted and talked since then and spent an entire day together the day she mentioned this plan. Her interest and initiation of communication is as high as ever. There's no indication that she's upset I'm even entertaining the idea.

Part of me feels like this sounds interesting. Part of me thinks, we're a couple, I shouldn't do this to her. I've had affairs in the past while in relationships and it's not something I wanted to do again, especially with her. But is it cheating if she's arranging it? OK with it? I mean sure, I'd love to have a threesome. With my girl and another girl or two other girls. But if I had to choose between that and my girl, if doing such a thing would cause us issues in the future, I'd choose my girl. I certainly would NOT be ok with the idea of HER being with other guys...
How old is she? How experienced is she?

I get the impression that she's going to use this in a way to control you or get something from you down the line.
 

TheProspect

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Pass on it. Because, as Rollo Tomassi said, she's going to use that against you later on when she wants to do a three some... With another dude.
This.

She may tell you otherwise right now, but down the line she may feel differently about it, and it will cause an issue should she want a MMF threesome down the road and you decline. She will use this MFF threesome against you in her mind and she will resent you for not allowing her to have one.

Just because it’s your fantasy, and your GF is offering for it to manifest, doesn’t mean it has to happen. If you wanted to sleep with other women, or wanted to have a threesome, I would have just remained non-exclusive…

If you wouldn’t be okay with your chick sucking and fvcking other d!cks, I wouldn’t take her up on her offer…. The potential can of worms that can open down the line by accepting it is not worth it.

If I wanted a no-strings attached threesome with a lower risk of causing problems in my relationship, I probably would just cheat and hire two high end escorts lol… but I haven’t banged an escort yet, so if I was in your situation, I would just pass on the offer.

However, if you don’t see things working out with this chick long-term, or if you ever plan on dumping her in the near future, then by all means — take her up on that threesome!
 

SmoothSmooth

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She could be BPD
Had the exact same thing from a girl who later turned out to be BPD
 

metalwater

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no babe, You are with me, that's just for you and me, the others will have to stand in line and not get a turn for now.

if it's a sht test you pass it by not agreeing. if it's not a sht test she doesn't understand bonding or doesn't care and is not LTR material, or it is a reason to rationalize cheating on you now or in the future. remember women OFTEN do not tell the truth, even if they like you.
 

Willie Naylor

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Pass on it. Because, as Rollo Tomassi said, she's going to use that against you later on when she wants to do a three some... With another dude.
I'd tell her to go ahead and set it up.

Down the line, when she wants her 3some with another guy, say No.

That's that.
 

Willie Naylor

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Doesn't work like that dude. She'll prob. do it anyway, just not tell you.
This has no bearing on what his decision now should be.

Go ahead and have the 3way. If she cheats on him later, well, he'll still have had this experience.
 

RickTheToad

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This has no bearing on what his decision now should be.

Go ahead and have the 3way. If she cheats on him later, well, he'll still have had this experience.
I guess. If he has no qualms in losing her, then he should go for it. However, the devil is indeed in the details.
 

Willie Naylor

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I guess. If he has no qualms in losing her, then he should go for it. However, the devil is indeed in the details.
If a chick wants to cheat on you, she's gonna cheat on you.

Nothing you do, or don't do, is going to stop her.
 

joesbigship

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New relationship after a recent breakup with a different girl. The girl is hot, put together, well-off, etc. Long story short, laying in bed,
Why is anyone taking missouri even halfway seriously? He's obviously copy/pasting his fictional dating stories from just a couple of weeks ago. Clearly, he's very bored in his retirement, smh.

There are no hot women in missouri anyway. Unless you consider Rosie O Donnell hot. Probably beexcellent's dupe account.

Since my twenties with my 9 and 10 gf's they always had male orbiters, besties, etc. Trying to cut them out has never worked. Some became an issue, but largely in hindsight, because of the girl (IMO).

My new gf is Asian, for some reason I trust her in a way I've never trusted any woman. It took longer to bed her, she has a low body count despite her 10 looks, etc.

So we're laying in bed one Sunday
 
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Barrister

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This is literally always a trap for the reasons some other posters have already given. If you have any desire to maintain an actual LTR with this women you refuse. If you don't give a sh1t then go for it. Understand though that this essentially guarantees the relationship is not going to last.

In all honesty though, the fact she is even offering it is not a good sign for your LTR prospects with her. So I hope you don't feel overly invested with her.
 

Modern Man Advice

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New relationship after a recent breakup with a different girl. The girl is hot, put together, well-off, etc. Long story short, laying in bed, she asked me my sexual fantasy. I told her. I asked her why she asked, she said to make sure she pleases me. Next morning after we wake up she said she is going to arrange it for me on a trip in a few months [she clearly thought about it since she didn't say it until the next morning]. Said I can choose to have her involved or two other girls. I asked her why she would do this, allow me to be with other women and even arrange it for me. She said she wants to make sure I'm pleased and she'd rather know about it since she arranged it rather than me doing things behind her back.

I didn't say no. I wasn't sure if it was a test. I don't think it was since I didn't say no exactly and she didn't try to say she now knows I want other women, aha, caught you, etc.

I've periodically joked with her about a threesome with her and her friends or her sister (married). Literally was just teasing her. Not sure what to make of this.

My takeaways are:

1) High interest (she also handed me nearly 1K worth of gifts as part of my holiday gifts, she has more but she wanted me to have these now to wear for her).
2) For her it's about our connection and relationship not sex (as is the case with most women). She'd rather see me happy with other women on the side than me leaving for another woman. I think.
3) It COULD be a test, but we've texted and talked since then and spent an entire day together the day she mentioned this plan. Her interest and initiation of communication is as high as ever. There's no indication that she's upset I'm even entertaining the idea.

Part of me feels like this sounds interesting. Part of me thinks, we're a couple, I shouldn't do this to her. I've had affairs in the past while in relationships and it's not something I wanted to do again, especially with her. But is it cheating if she's arranging it? OK with it? I mean sure, I'd love to have a threesome. With my girl and another girl or two other girls. But if I had to choose between that and my girl, if doing such a thing would cause us issues in the future, I'd choose my girl. I certainly would NOT be ok with the idea of HER being with other guys...
While it is quite tempting, this can go so many ways. Many which will be against you.

First off, you referred to her as your "gf". Unless you believe in open relationships and polygamy, this is simply detrimental to the LTR. She doesn't sound LTR material as @Barrister said.

But if on the other hand this is simply a plate or girl you're "seeing" and do not care about, then you can cross that fantasy off your check list and move on. Meaning, get it off your system now that you are practically single.


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