Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
LovelyLady said:Thought I'd share some info on Feminism as a political movement for those who may not know...
In Western culture there are three main timeframes of Feminism :
The first was Victorian/Edwardian/20's.
It's beginning is usually marked with Sojourner Truth's famous Ain't I Woman? speech. It extends through obtaining the right for women to own and inherit property, and enter in to legal contracts. This period ended with women getting the right to vote in 1919. (There was early addressing of economic and reproductive rights at this time - but not much actual change regarding these occured during this first period).
The second period was the 60's and 70's.
Women's rights to control their reproductive destinies were addressed by feminists with the pursuit for access to birth control, abortions, and access to affordable pre-natal care (and to have female health/reproductive needs be covered by insurance companys). Legal protection/recourse regarding pay inequity, sexual harrassment in the work place and domestic violence were also addressed.
The third movement is 90's to now.
The Feminist movement is working on addressing forced prostitution, child prostitution, genital mutilation (aka female circumsion) and rape. This movement is starting to address the concerns of women outside of the Western World.
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However, philosophically, there are two main divisions that have existed within Feminism. (But both sub-groups remain united in addressing the aforementioned causes.)
With the first sub-group, the belief that the differences in the sexes are bioligically based, are acceptable, and need to be honored by equality with the differences respected.
The second sub-group believes that the differences in the genders are due to social conditioning and therefore need to be eliminated.
It is this second philosophical sub-group that has much social/relational impact on our culture.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
True, but read the Book of Pook to get a good idea of what anti-feminists are saying. Or better, Pook's blog: dapook.blogspot.com. His recent "Radicalism of Vilar" posts get quite nicely to the point.potato said:I grew up in the 70's when feminism was coming into its own. Mostly it was about setting women free from having to define themselves by the men in their lives. It was about birth control and pursuing careers. I really don't see it as a problem and certainly don't know what all the right wingers complain about all the time.
It takes a wimpy man to worry about competition from women.