I went to lovevolution this weekend in San Francisco and it was crazy. For those of you who have never been its definitely a must. However, it made me finally realize where my game is hurting the most. It was an epiphany that came to me after a couple of days after the event.
I have trouble relating to women. I got a lot in common with guys. I like working out, I like getting intoxicated, I like checking out chicks asses, and im really big on video games. The girls that i want to go after and i dont seem to connect. The only thing we have in common is sex.
This is what i figured out this weekend. Every girl that i went into and started talking to i got rejected. Almost all the girls i just went up with and danced with no talking took me so much further. I actually made out with 5 different girls and fingered one when i didn't open my mouth. (and no my breath didn't stink i checked)
Not trying to brag, but i have always been told i had attractive qualities. I look good and keep up my hygeine. I speak well (grammatically with no stutter), when im not too drunk or high. All my successes with women can be pointed at that however. Which is sad.
An example of my blundering Conversational Skills =D: (If i don't look for some humor it would be a lot harder to deal with)
My buddy had started talking to these girls, and he motions me over. So i go over and he is talking to one of the girls and i start talking to the other one. This is as exact as i can get it because i was semi-drunk at the time.
Me: hi whats your name
Girl: (I don't remember)
Me: oh thats a cool name. are you and your friend from around here.
Girl: Yeah we both go to berkely
(Me running out of things to talk about, now that i think about it i should have brought up a school rivalry of berkely or somthing)
Me: So what does your shirt say
Girl: Oh its in Jewish
Me: Well what does it say?
Girl: Well i went to a jewish summer camp and it means blah blah blah, which represents the age groups of the different summer groups.
Me: Thats cool....
This is where things became awkward and my buddy jumped back into the conversation, asking what her shirt meant >.<, he was able to flip it though he is a lot better at talking to girls than i am....
I haven't had very many women friends in my life. Almost all of them have been guys over the years, this is mostly due to when i had a much more severe case of talking to girls. Its still there now just a lot smaller. I have no sisters or girl cousins growing up. I have a pretty good relationship with my mother, but that didn't probably help much. In fact the only girl i really spent any time with was my high school girlfriend and our relationship was mostly physical with her believing she was in love with me.
I am tired of this... I feel like i could be doing so much better... I realize that you guys may not know of a way to help, but at least identifying the problem for myself could assist me. Maybe i need to memorize scripts? I have been doing everything freestyle so far and it hasn't helped...
It is also highly possible that I am capable of noticing more about girls than i realize, but my shyness takes over without me realizing it. I usually feel very confident though until i realize that i don't have **** to talk to them about. Then all my shyness and insecurities bubble and i can't even successfully do the one thing im good at with girls which is being physical...
Sorry if this post seems long or a rant. I just want this fixed now(even though this may not be possible). Its gone on for too long. However, i have to give myself some credit it has gotten a lot better over the last two years. Im just reluctant to wait another two years to develop past this.
I have trouble relating to women. I got a lot in common with guys. I like working out, I like getting intoxicated, I like checking out chicks asses, and im really big on video games. The girls that i want to go after and i dont seem to connect. The only thing we have in common is sex.
This is what i figured out this weekend. Every girl that i went into and started talking to i got rejected. Almost all the girls i just went up with and danced with no talking took me so much further. I actually made out with 5 different girls and fingered one when i didn't open my mouth. (and no my breath didn't stink i checked)
Not trying to brag, but i have always been told i had attractive qualities. I look good and keep up my hygeine. I speak well (grammatically with no stutter), when im not too drunk or high. All my successes with women can be pointed at that however. Which is sad.
An example of my blundering Conversational Skills =D: (If i don't look for some humor it would be a lot harder to deal with)
My buddy had started talking to these girls, and he motions me over. So i go over and he is talking to one of the girls and i start talking to the other one. This is as exact as i can get it because i was semi-drunk at the time.
Me: hi whats your name
Girl: (I don't remember)
Me: oh thats a cool name. are you and your friend from around here.
Girl: Yeah we both go to berkely
(Me running out of things to talk about, now that i think about it i should have brought up a school rivalry of berkely or somthing)
Me: So what does your shirt say
Girl: Oh its in Jewish
Me: Well what does it say?
Girl: Well i went to a jewish summer camp and it means blah blah blah, which represents the age groups of the different summer groups.
Me: Thats cool....
This is where things became awkward and my buddy jumped back into the conversation, asking what her shirt meant >.<, he was able to flip it though he is a lot better at talking to girls than i am....
I haven't had very many women friends in my life. Almost all of them have been guys over the years, this is mostly due to when i had a much more severe case of talking to girls. Its still there now just a lot smaller. I have no sisters or girl cousins growing up. I have a pretty good relationship with my mother, but that didn't probably help much. In fact the only girl i really spent any time with was my high school girlfriend and our relationship was mostly physical with her believing she was in love with me.
I am tired of this... I feel like i could be doing so much better... I realize that you guys may not know of a way to help, but at least identifying the problem for myself could assist me. Maybe i need to memorize scripts? I have been doing everything freestyle so far and it hasn't helped...
It is also highly possible that I am capable of noticing more about girls than i realize, but my shyness takes over without me realizing it. I usually feel very confident though until i realize that i don't have **** to talk to them about. Then all my shyness and insecurities bubble and i can't even successfully do the one thing im good at with girls which is being physical...
Sorry if this post seems long or a rant. I just want this fixed now(even though this may not be possible). Its gone on for too long. However, i have to give myself some credit it has gotten a lot better over the last two years. Im just reluctant to wait another two years to develop past this.