"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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"moving too fast" - anti slut defense or low interest?

paulwis

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Ok so I've been on two dates with this one girl. We get along extremely well and everything just clicks. All we've done is kiss... the first date was a couple of deep pecks and the second date were longer kisses, in which SHE initiated the usage of A LOT of tongue. She texted me saying she really wanted to talk to me on IM. I had never talked to her on IM before but she made it sound really important so I went on for a little bit to talk about whatever it was. Once we got to what she actually wanted to talk about, she said that we hardly know each other, and would much rather be friends first before we get into anything serious and not get our hopes up. She also mentioned out of the blue that she had recently broken up with her boyfriend. I don't know how long ago, but I will ask tonight I guess. I told her we shouldn't be talking about this over IM, that we should save it for when we hang out tonight. I agree that we hardly know each other at this point, but isn't that what the dating process is for in the first place... I want to make it perfectly clear to her that I am not looking for another friend, especially with the hopes of having it become more. Bad idea :down: . I don't know if she is simply low interest or if she is uncomfortable being intimate with me at this point since we don't really know each other well. How should I go about the date tonight? My goal is to keep it going the way it was. It's not like I'm pushing sex or anything.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Poonani Maker

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She's trying to get you to chase. Fvck her. There are other fish in the sea.
 

j0n024

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I agree tell her that your dates are a way of you guy's getting to know each other better I mean spending time togethor helps you find stuff out about each other doesnt it? It seems to me she is trying to push you away because her ex is trying to get back with her and maybe you were just the rebound who knows all I know is you shouldnt let this affect you that much but stay in control of the relationship ok and good luck update.
 

Bible_Belt

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How should I go about the date tonight? My goal is to keep it going the way it was. It's not like I'm pushing sex or anything.

I agree, except you actually can push sex. Don't rape the girl, but there's nothing wrong with being aggressive. Use actions not words. With your words, agree emphatically when she says the ljbf bs. Salesman call it 'acknowledge and ignore.' You just keep on going like she never said anything. She wants sex as much as you do, all you have to do is overcome her psychological and social ASD conditioning.

If you get shot down in flames, don't show anger or frustration. Just stop taking her calls for a few days. After you pull back, you can try her again. If you are spinning other plates as you should be, there is nothing wrong with going beck to a woman who has rejected you, as long as she has been properly punished for that rejection by withholding you attention and making her come crawling back.
 

paulwis

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UPDATE:
We went to eat, talked about it - the conversation went exactly my way the whole time, she agreed with everything. Things went super and we made out at the end. Isn't that a happy ending :D

oh, and she said I was the best kisser she's had. double :D
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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paulwis

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haha, why do you two come to this exact same conclusion?
 

IceCream

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(One) she wanted to talk to you on IM, then talks about just wanting to be friends. She's "dated" you twice and already she wants to be just friends?

(Two) She says she recently broke up with her "ex"-boyfriend, and yet has been "seeing" you. She also claims she doesnt know you well enough to be in a relationship.

(Three) I can go on-and on explaining how she's just making excuses because she either found something, or someone better, or she's back to her ex.

Conclusion, she lost interest in you.

LJBF (Lets just be friends), checkmate.

Do yourself a favor and find someone else, if she tries to crawl back into a relationship with you (make sure its more than friends this time), then you can decide, if she doesn't, then atleast you've moved on. All in all it seems like you've been used for a rebound.
 
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Typical of today's hors! What the hell is wrong with these chicks!!! She goes down your throat and then through IM, tells you to chill!! No bytch, you chill - I'm being a man!!!
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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