"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Moving Forward . .

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Forty0ztoFreedom

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Well I've been AFC-ing about this girl for a couple of weeks and bothering you all with pathetic threads.

I am calling tommorow for a second date. Forgetting all the analyzing I've done (believing things I have no proof on based on fear). Forgetting the fear. No more am I going to "gauge interest." Only "action" and moving forward.

Even if it looked/looks like this was un-salvageable, even if it crashes & burns, I have nothing to lose. This is a step forward, IMO, even if I get turned down. It will still be a step forward, rather than cutting & running based on fear of being hurt. (rationalizing it as cutting off contact b/c she "disrespected me" . . I am not a DJ yet, I can't pretend to be)

Also, I made a thread about a fear of moving out. Today I decided I am. Its time to grow up. Its official, I am going to be on my own. I may even start DJ Boot-camp soon . . BTW, I love the DJ bible but noticed some questionable comments about it here. Has it become cliche and outdated or something?

This is the LAST thread I start on this girl, unless its a successful report on a second date. I promise this to myself. Tomorrow is my, ahem, her, last chance.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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playainthemaking

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hey man i just wanted to add something since i had the same issue in some ways. Dont think about her and just move on and do something else. If you have nothing going on in your life or no ohter women thats when you get hit with the feelings. Feelings are bad for the first few months or weeks depends.

PS I keep hearing about dj boot camp can u explain. there needs to be a SoSuave dictionary lol.
 
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Forty0ztoFreedom

Senior Don Juan
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Well maybe a more experienced member can answer your question better but I believe its just a series of tasks set over a certain time designed to get us used to getting out there and trying to get chicks.

As for my scenario, a perfectly predictable outcome. She's with a "friend" out to dinner. I assume its some dude. She's going on the trip and won't be available the next 2 saturdays. I ask, "How bout the next Saturday?" She gives a hesitated "possibly" and asks if she could get back to me. I say sure, "See you around." And hang up.

Game over, I'm guessing. I am right to "next" this girl right, and not just flying off the handle?
 
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